To think the exclamation mark is overused and misused?

[WhatsTheExclamationFor]

This isn't a full grammar nazi situation - I'm not perfect so not bothered about grammar, as long as I can understand what's being said.

What bothers me a bit is how people use the exclamation mark. What's with all the shouting or emphasising statements? Isn't that largely what the symbol is for? But people often use it in place of full stop or as a passive aggressive signal or just because they can. It can be confusing when chatting with someone and you're not sure if something is wrong and they're showing it through '!' after every word or they simply felt like using it. It's worse if they've not been using it and suddenly it's there.

"Hello, how are you?"
"I'm fine!"

"Hope the issue was sorted! Let me know how it goes!"

"I've enjoyed my house and I'm glad we moved!!!"

"I'll let the plumber know!"

All in casual conversation with no need to exclaim anything and no other signs of any issues. Am I missing the point of the !, which requires more effort to find on the keyboard than the full stop?

What's the exclamation mark (!) for?

I think I’m guilty of overpunctuating. I’m weirdly hyper-conscious of how tone can be missed/misconstrued in written conversation, so often use it to convey an upbeat manner.

I'm afraid I love an exclamation mark (!)

I think it depends on the context. You can usually tell when someone's using it to show excitement, which I think is a good part of it.

That was to @breathe

Very guilty of this. I tend to use it as a full stop as I worry that full stops sometimes seem a bit blunt to me. (Had to really stop myself adding one to the end of that sentence)

I think it's because we are so reliant on digital communication these days that we are careful to not sound too severe, because we lack the other cues of body language, tone, etc.

There are lots of memes floating around about the over-use of exclamation marks in emails to make sure people don't think you're mad at them! (yes that was on purpose)

There are also some interesting gendered implications - women do it more than men, for example. This article touches on them:

www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20190606-the-danger-of-overusing-exclamation-marks

The only place I'd have used an exclamation mark in your examples would be after 'goes.' And this is as a rom com author who lives for exclamation marks!!

To me there is a difference between 'I am fine ' and 'I am fine!. The latter implies there may be reason why I may not be fine. For e.g., I witness me fall etc. With the exclamation mark I am telling you that contrary to what it may have looked like, I am fine.
Of course some people overuse exclamation marks but without context it us hard to say if i agree with your examples.
I have a colleague who overuses punctuation and comes across as quite confrontational as result.

What!!!

Haha. To be honest, having seen it used in place of full stop so many times, full stop does sometimes seem slightly formal, when I use it.

I suppose I only have issues with it when it gets confusing and I can't tell what the person is trying to convey with it.

I know what you mean. Also see 'lol' being used as if it is a full stop more and more.

@drumst1ck

YANBU. It can make the person come across as really really hyper 😁

It's the same with too many questions marks?????

It makes people sound impatient or really irritable.

I think it's important to try to convey the tone of what you're saying over text messages.

I like an exclamation mark when it’s used correctly.

@kurentovanje

I think it's because we are so reliant on digital communication these days that we are careful to not sound too severe, because we lack the other cues of body language, tone, etc.

There are lots of memes floating around about the over-use of exclamation marks in emails to make sure people don't think you're mad at them! (yes that was on purpose)

That's interesting. Haven't come across the meme but will check it out. Also interesting that people see ! as less aggressive. It's usually the other way round for me and it can come across quite aggressive but now makes sense as to why many people use it.

[quote kurentovanje]There are also some interesting gendered implications - women do it more than men, for example. This article touches on them:

www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20190606-the-danger-of-overusing-exclamation-marks[/quote]
Yes, I've mainly observed the overuse and misuse of it in women circles, much like xx, compared to men.

Will look at the link, thanks.

I use far too many!!

I have occasionally seen a post on Facebook where someone is remembering the death of another person - parent, friend or someone who mattered to them. They write something like:
“Missing you. Can’t believe it’s been a year!”

That exclamation mark seems so out of place. How can people use it in serious contexts.

Yabu! I think it makes me sound upbeat!!

Yes! !! that's me!!!! it even annoys me!!! I just can't stop!! I don't know the rules!!

@onekeyatatime Yes that's what I mean. In this case, it's a habitual "I'm fine!" which can be said when something is wrong and when it isn't. No other reason or sign of an issue and conversations go well mostly but often you can be left wondering how to tell the difference.

You're left trying to decode previous and after sentences to work out the context of the exclamation marks.

Omg I so get you! It really can be confusing can’t it??! 🤣

I think it’s really just so people don’t get taken as being too abrupt by text. It’s more of a trying to be friendly thing I guess. Have you ever text someone old/that doesn’t use text speak very often and found that they use full stops a lot? It can come across quite abrupt. I think the exclamation marks are just people going the opposite way, they’re trying to show they are happy/being friendly.

I've had to stop using it... my boss thought I was being passive aggressive!!! FFS!!!!!