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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be expected to clean poo skid marks from my kids toilet???

69 replies

Mylittlepea · 01/04/2021 21:03

ALL THE BLOODY TIME????

Clearly I need to get out more (but.......Wink) I lost it today with a big shouty rant........the DC have a family bathroom that generally me & DH don’t use so I know my DD15 or DS10 had a massive dump in this toilet without cleaning up with the loo brush & bleach afterwards. It’s like they sit sideways or something and deliberately aim at the side of the bowl instead of the water.

This is a daily occurrence and neither is owning up to it. I’m on leave from work this week and I’ve been keeping busy sorting the garden, spending time with them but also slaving away like a f**g maid tidying the kitchen, serving up endless meals and snacks and picking up crap as I go. DH is brilliant around the house and has been doing some huge DIY jobs so no worries there.

AIBU to expect the little darlings to help out a bit. The skidmarks have pushed me over the edge so I’m now self medicating with wine....

OP posts:
RightOnTheEdge · 02/04/2021 00:21

That video is awful Sad
Those poor kids. Who talks to little kids like that?
Who could look at their faces afterwards and find it funny?

worriedatthemoment · 02/04/2021 00:23

So how do people clean such marks without a loo brush?

StrawBeretMoose · 02/04/2021 00:59

@mrurddhasabitpart

Strawberetmouse- I'm not wise, but the other two are - send him to get super tampons. If he can't/ won't/ squirms- he's a child and or misogynist. Drop. How does he treat barmaids/ waiters/ waitresses. How you treat those that serve you , is more about you than them. Imo you can learn a lot about how a person treats those that serve them.
Thank you @mrurddhasabitpart well maybe you're wise and you don't know it, you weed out the rubbish ones early on and don't waste your time! I didn't know until I was at uni that men even had a problem buying tampons as my dad bought our sanpro and could cope with the minefield of applicators, wings, not wings, and massive Kotex for night time! A friend asked me to buy some tampons as her boyfriend who worked in a supermarket wouldn't buy them at the end of his shift. Shock

The other one is very true too.

To @RedcurrantPuff don't set the bar so low for the men in your life. Sounds like all 4 of you need to start respecting you. 💐

StrawBeretMoose · 02/04/2021 01:04

@worriedatthemoment

So how do people clean such marks without a loo brush?
Well some people here say they wipe with toilet roll but I don't know what they do if the offending marks are actually at the bottom of the toilet under the water, no way would I put my hand in.

I remember the state of the toilet in a doctor's surgery one day, multiple skid marks and sweetcorn Envy not envy and apparently no attempt to flush it. I kind of thought maybe they were really sick but it was grim. If they weren't I just don't know how people think that's okay. And then realise maybe their parents never tell them to clean the bloody loo!

RobboCop · 02/04/2021 01:09

This reply has been deleted

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mathanxiety · 02/04/2021 02:58

@worriedatthemoment - I'm guessing they reach in with a wad of TP and wipe whatever they can off the side of the loo into the water?

I have a loo brush though, so this is only a guess.

maddiemookins16mum · 02/04/2021 05:39

If they aren’t already ‘helping out a bit’ by 15 and 10, then the words rod and own back spring to mind. If you don’t want to be treated like a maid, don’t act like one.

CuthbertDibbleandGrubb · 02/04/2021 06:52

Forty of you have no standards or are training your children to be snowflakes. OP of course using a toilet brush should be expected.

The only thing I would add is that if you are giving into pester power and having visits to McDonalds or other such fast food places, you are making things worse.

blubberball · 02/04/2021 07:03

I make my boys clean it up.

My youngest has disabilities and incontinence, and sometimes I can't keep up with the mess. When it's stripping beds, cleaning carpets, the 5th or 6th shower of the day.... But I still get him to clean the toilet when he's made a mess, or at least help.

BarbaraofSeville · 02/04/2021 07:15

I think if I had a 10 YO and a 15 YO who had use of a bathroom I never had to use, I'd just tell them it was there responsibility, leave them to it and never go in there.

If they don't know how to clean, there will be endless videos on Youtube, that they're invariably never off, to show them how.

Downunderduchess · 02/04/2021 07:41

They are definitely old enough to do some household chores, starting with cleaning their own toilet.

JerryMoreIceCream · 02/04/2021 07:56

When my children first potty trained they were taught to check the toilet post use, every time, then it gets them into the habit. So use, seat down, flush, then check.

If there is shit marks then the flush helps to wet it and they use a wad of toilet roll to clean it off, yes even below the water line. However, they were also taught to put some toilet roll into the toilet first to stop water splashing up when pooing which does stop the below water line issue.

Then they thoroughly wash their hands, like they are preparing for surgery. They are now 18 and 15, their bathroom is their responsibility to clean, not mine I don't use it and neither does Dh.

In the past when they were younger, any wee left on the seat I made them alternate cleaning it up. I said I didn't care who left it there, one of them was cleaning it.

They also do a "bathroom check" every Sunday where they check if they need to bring in more shampoo, soap and get more toilet roll from the main stash. They are both boys. I want them to be good housemates/husbands when they are older.

But OP don't clean that shit yourself, they both have to do it. All these children who leave shit marks are hopefully never on a playdate where they leave their shit in someone else's toilet. The only exception to the clean it yourself rule is public toilets.

Temp023 · 02/04/2021 07:59

Meh, 2 second scrub, bit of bleach. I don’t sweat it.
I guess both DDs will be cleaning their own loos soon enough!

oblada · 02/04/2021 08:07

15 and 10 is plenty old enough to know better!
My kids are 9, 6 and 4 and all of them at least attempt to clean up after themselves. No issue with my 9yrs old. My 6yrs old occasionally forgets. My 4yrs old need supervision doing it. But all of them try at least!
I'd leave their loo for them to clean tbh.

SempreSuiGeneris · 02/04/2021 08:27

I would be very surprised if the average 10 year old is capable of not only using a toilet brush to remove skid marks but then subsequently making sure the brush is clean before replacing it in its holder without dripping it all over the floor.

The ramifications of them sticking their hands down the bowl if they don't have a brush are worse.

Also not a huge fan of leaving bleach out for them to slosh around. Before you get to the health hazards consider how many clothes they are likely to accidentally ruin.

My 2 shout at each other if there are skid marks. A repeat flush usually solves the problem but we have side stepped the pitfalls of low flush water saving. My DM's family bathroom toilet takes several flushes to down the average pooh let alone skid marks so they avoid using her toilet as much as possible - good for her but not so much for their digestion if they are staying over.

My lot all have chores including laundry, hoovering, dishes, bath cleaning and bins but I am in charge of toilet hygiene. My standards are too high to delegate on this one area.

KateMidd · 02/04/2021 08:43

YANBU! Moreover, you need to teach them things like this. It's not easy, and I don't say they will do everything immediately, but they should know that they need to learn to clean up after themselves. Because if you miss this moment they'll never know about a toilet brush themselves.

Alannathelioness · 02/04/2021 08:44

This would drive me bonkers. I get so angry when people leave a mess in the toilet. It's totally unnecessary and says you're happy for someone else to literally clean up your shit. I see red.
When my husband's cousin came to stay for a few months (late teens) he asked if there were any house rules. Before I could even speak up my husband said "Clean the toilet every time you use it, skiddies aren't tolerated here". Grin So glad we are on the same page.

I'd be dragging them in (both) every time you walk in and find a mess. If they don't want to be forced to confront their own or each others shit then they will quickly learn to clean up - and they'll start to rib each other about it to.

lifeinlimbo2020 · 02/04/2021 09:19

That Scottish woman is horrible and the video isn't funny. The way she talks to those girls. Imagine what she's like when she's telling them off 😞 if people don't use loo brushes though what do you use to clean the actual marks off the toilet?

Original poster
Mylittlepea · 02/04/2021 12:24

Thanks all, haven’t watched the video but your comments are enough to make me not want to....

I’m in a better mood today Grin

My kids do some jobs like laying the table, clearing the table after dinner, unloading/loading dishwasher, keep their own bedrooms really tidy & free of rubbish, helping load the washing machine etc DD cooks & helps prep dinner occasionally too so it’s not all bad.

We eat a great diet and a takeaway is a rare treat once a month so I’m not concerned about that.

FYI I give the bathroom a thorough clean once a week and then a quick spray & wipe in between so I’m not expecting my kids to crack on with the rubber gloves & bleach btw......but you’ll be pleased to know DD cleaned up after my rant yesterday and DS10 had his loo brush/cleaning training this morning.

Yes all 1st world problems, but isn’t that what MN is for???

Have a good weekend all x Flowers

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