Weird lies you told as a child

[whiskersonkittenss]

In primary school I told people Mark Owen from Take That was my cousin. This was in the height of TT fame and people believed me. Not sure how I got out of bringing him to school to meet everyone

My parents house had a brick built compost heap at the end end of the garden which belonged to our neighbours. I told my friends that my pet guinea pigs lived in there - in a bricked up pit!
I also told some kids on holiday that my name was Katrina.

I can’t remember how it started - I think I’d fallen out with one of my friends - but I told people my real best friend was the daughter of a man who worked for my dad, who went to a very expensive boarding school and used to tell me all about it in the holidays. Well, once I had started, I made up a whole life for her. I decided she was a few years older than me, so got up to all sorts of exciting things because her parents weren’t around to stop her. Everyone at the school used to sneak out and night and go clubbing (I was about 8 when I came up with all this!) I think I admitted it in the end because my friend said she was going to ask my mom if it was all true

Less elaborate, but because I’m part Irish, I took to telling people I’d be born there and we’d only moved a few years ago. I don’t know what I thought Ireland was like, but I made it sound like the Wild West

I can't think of any at all. Am i unusual lol??

I used to tell my friends that I was Scottish and also that I had a rich aunt in America.
I am adopted... and it turned out, when I traced my birth family, that my father is Scottish and most of the extended family are, and there was a well off aunt in America.

Gatekeeper

That I was Jewish...kept that one going for ages and have never admitted it since. Fast forward many years and my daughter at the same age (14) starts telling school and every one that listens that she is Jewish!!!!!
..
Oh I did that, I desperately wanted to be Jewish too.
I also said I was partly black (you couldn't be more pale than I), great grandparent or something.
I said I had kids too.
Certainly said I wasn't a virgin when I was.

My goodness, I was well versed in porky pies as a youngster was I not?

I could blush now at the memory.

I love these 😆.
I remember writing "news" every Monday in primary school (70s). One week I don't think I had much to say so I decided to make my DM sound more racy. I wrote that she had gone out to a restaurant, had had too much to drink and had fallen over on the pavement 😳 - all complete bobbins. When my teacher asked me about it, I said my Mum was a "lady of the night" as I thought this sounded glamourous.
Nowadays, I think this would have gone on CPOMS (child protection alert) but at the time I think the adults took it in their stride. DM was a farmer's wife, well-known in a village where everyone knew your business!

I told my school friends that I was a black belt in Karate (I must have been about 8). One of the boys did actually do karate and he didn’t believe me. He challenged me to bring in my black belt to prove it. The next day I arrived with a belt (a turquoise dressing gown belt), he said ‘it’s a bit fluffy’, I replied with ‘that’s because my karate club is called the Buffalo Karate club’.

I also used to tell people that my mum went to school with Madonna - she’s probably about 15 years older than Madonna and we’re from Hull!

@GinJeanie

I love these 😆. I remember writing "news" every Monday in primary school (70s). One week I don't think I had much to say so I decided to make my DM sound more racy. I wrote that she had gone out to a restaurant, had had too much to drink and had fallen over on the pavement 😳 - all complete bobbins. When my teacher asked me about it, I said my Mum was a "lady of the night" as I thought this sounded glamourous. Nowadays, I think this would have gone on CPOMS (child protection alert) but at the time I think the adults took it in their stride. DM was a farmer's wife, well-known in a village where everyone knew your business!

Did your dm ever find out? That made me laugh and remember I once told people my nan was a shore. I heard it on a film and thought it meant something nice

I remember writing in my 'news' that Donny and Merrill Osmond had bought me and my sister a big bunch of flowers and they sang Crazy Horses in our front room.

That I had a secret family in Hawaii that I could teleport too from a middle spot in my bedroom room

Great Uncle Bulgaria was my uncle

@knackeredcat

That I'd won a bike in a competition and could play the cello - not too outlandish in the scheme of things, but I'm cringing typing this now!

This just reminded me, I told my now dh years ago when we were dating that I used to play the cello in the school orchestra. He surprised me with a beautiful expensive cello for Christmas that year. I must have forgotten to tell him the bit where I couldn't hold the bow in my weak right hand ( leftie) and that I used to just pretend to play and leave the other cellist to actually play the notes. My music teacher was a 98 year old nun and myself and the other cellist used to take lessons together with her. She was obviously half blind and deaf so never noticed that I wasn't actually making contact with the strings. Couldn't even read the music never mind figure out how to play the actual notes.

That I had a phone in my bedroom (true) but throat it had its own extension number (not true obs)

I did actually have my own phone number. My mother got sick of me tying up the line that she had one installed. I used to read the Babysitters Club books around the same time and one of the characters had her own line too. It made me want to set up my own BSC.

We lived in a town house and my bedroom was on the top floor and the kitchen was two floors below, so my mother would ring me when dinner was ready.

I once told everyone that I went up in a hot air balloon. I didn't. I stood chatting to the men who were getting it ready and then went on my merry way.

I also added the middle name Mary to my name for a while because I thought it looked fancier than my (actually very nice) given names.

Oh and I once told some other local kids that I knew how to hot wire a car (I don't). I was overheard and laughed at when I got home.

@whiskersonkittenss - tbh, I can't remember DM being cross. I think she enjoyed the anecdote and shared it many times. Not sure how I'd feel if my DC had done this to me when they were younger!
Did your Nan find out?

I gave myself several middle names over my childhood, having none, but after I got to know my birth mother, I pointed out the lack of one and she finally gave me the one I use now.

I also lied about not being a virgin when I was and gave myself a mysterious made up boyfriend for a while. I seem to remember he had a lime green VW Beetle.
Later, when hitchhiking, I used to give myself a different name and life story for everyone who picked me up. Not sure how successful being French was, but I had fun.

@Whatthechicken

I told my school friends that I was a black belt in Karate (I must have been about 8). One of the boys did actually do karate and he didn’t believe me. He challenged me to bring in my black belt to prove it. The next day I arrived with a belt (a turquoise dressing gown belt), he said ‘it’s a bit fluffy’, I replied with ‘that’s because my karate club is called the Buffalo Karate club’.

@Giggorata

I gave myself several middle names over my childhood, having none, but after I got to know my birth mother, I pointed out the lack of one and she finally gave me the one I use now.

I also lied about not being a virgin when I was and gave myself a mysterious made up boyfriend for a while. I seem to remember he had a lime green VW Beetle.
Later, when hitchhiking, I used to give myself a different name and life story for everyone who picked me up. Not sure how successful being French was, but I had fun.

I did all of that too! I always said afterwards that my parents were too mean to give me more than one name. Also met birth mother but didn't get another name from her and she liked my name which was on my original birth certificate.

Not being a virgin and an invented boyfriend, hitchhiking, etc.....are you me?