To be very worried how I’m going to work in the school holidays?

[Cherrymentos19]

Single parent
Returning to work
My children are at private schools - so great during term time as wonderful before and after school activities

However the holidays are outrageously long!

Easter break... 3.5 weeks

Summer holidays... 9 weeks!

Half terms are generally 2 weeks.

I have no support locally. The children’s father will not be on hand in any meaningful way, and absolutely no point pursuing that point - because zero chance of change. Zero.

So what do people do?!

I worked in a school until my youngest was old enough to not need holiday clubs. That was the only way we could work it and I've got another half. You have my sympathies, OP, it seems like an impossible task.

If you have a spare room, get an au pair. Book them into holiday clubs if possible. Ask if grandparents can have them for a few nights mid week here and there.

Bloody useless men who don't take responsibility for their children's needs! You shouldn't have to cope with this alone.

From around age 16 my DD and her friend worked for a local family with 4 children during the holidays to provide care. It worked very well.

You do what everyone else does! Anyone who works and has kids has this issue.

Grandparents, siblings (can you share childcare?) relatives.
Get a job at a school, TA, Admin, or train to be a teacher.
Use holiday.
Get a job where you can take unpaid leave
Pay for childcare, children's clubs in the holidays, take your holidays when the children's clubs aren't running

OP - We use a mixture of annual leave and holiday clubs for my eldest and will continue to do so when youngest starts in September.

It might be worth having a look at other private schools, as they may run holiday clubs. I've had to use local private schools holiday clubs, as DD's school holidays are similar to your DC's holidays.

How old are your children? Can you ask on your local Facebook page about clubs etc in your area. Ours is really helpful, you might be able to advertise on there too for someone to look after them for the times you can't.

How old are your kids, OP-that would probably help refine the answers a bit.

Do you have any available family who might help? Do you know anyone with similar age children you could suggest a swapping arrangement with like a pp above? What sort of hours would you need childcare for?

If you’re in Yorkshire I have ideas if you want to message me?

Otherwise look at local nurseries, a lot have holiday clubs.

Also childminders.

Ask your school for suggestions.

Contact local council family information service and ask where your nearest provision is.

Contact friends who may have university students looking for holiday work. If you find a nice one then they can take to park and make a lunch for them over the holidays. It wouldn’t cost a lot to pay for them to do a paediatric first aid course first for your own peace of mind.

I think it’s unfair to assume the OP is loaded because her kids go to a private school. My best friend saved and saved most of her 20s to fund her first child going to private school, she wanted to give him the best fighting chance in life and she’s only sending him for the primary part as she simply won’t afford to do the second part but he’s a doing so well and it will give him a good shot at a grammar school too.

OP I'm not sure what the point about bursaries means? I can see you're saying that you don't pay full fees but presumably you pay some fees and other more expensive costs? So you are in a wealthy position relative to most? I remember being very cross with a school-friend mum who was recommending we try and get a scholarship for our eldest and saying "they can be up to 75%". I wanted to shake her and ask who she thought would pay the other 25% then? the assumption that we were able to was so arrogant.

Anyway, that aside, I think you might need to just explore local holiday clubs. They will run according to state school holidays so you will then have the option of either taking your AL to cover the extra bits of holiday (not a bad idea as places you might like to visit will be less crowded then) or using the private school clubs for those extra weeks.

Or, what we did was child-care swops with friends. That might be less do-able in a private school as with my friends we were all trying to make ends meet so equally glad to have free options even if a day looking after someone else's kids is hard work. I guess that given the wealth around at any private school other parents may be less interested? Might be worth considering and talking to people about though.

94% of people avoid this problem by sending their children to state school. There is still a challenge for holiday care but the holidays are much shorter and many people I know manage a mix of annual leave, family help, paid clubs and swaps with friends.

Of the 6% or so who send to private school, the majority will have relatively high incomes and can afford either a SAHP or various forms of paid childcare. Few private schools offer 100% bursaries, its exceptionally rare, so almost anyone with children at a private school is unlikely to be on a truly low income. Of the remainder some will have family help or a partner so extra annual leave.

You may find that paid holiday clubs covering the full extent of private school holidays isn't common due to the relatively low demand for it. A childminder or nanny might be better. Look into unpaid parental leave which could give you a couple of extra weeks.

In my son's later primary school years I used a childminder.
This allowed me more flexibility than the sports camps and also gave him more of a 'being at home' feel during the holidays than being shuttled off to camps.

I am a single parent working full time and managed with a mix of
childminder, holiday sports camps and the odd day here and there when friends would invite him over.

He's older now thank goodness (12) so it's A LOT easier.

You said no room for an au pair but do the children have separate rooms? Could they maybe share over the summer to allow you to get someone in? Depends on age and gender I guess, live-out is probably a better bet.

@Cherrymentos19How old are your children OP? How much childcare do they need?

Could you see if a student wanted to come round to supervise them it would probably cheaper than holiday clubs? You could ask at a local college for students where they do childcare courses?

It’s a juggle for most working parents when they are young but people find solutions. Will you be working out the house full time OP?

I take a a couple of weeks unpaid leave. I use holiday clubs, my children don’t like the regular ones but will tolerate sports/drama/specific activity ones. These often finish earlier at 3pm so I pay a local student to pick them up and take them home. Once a little older they can stay overnight at PGL type camps.

@Designingheaven My best friend saved and saved most of her 20s to fund her first child going to private school, she wanted to give him the best fighting chance in life and she’s only sending him for the primary part

Has she got other children then?

Holiday clubs. We connect with DD's friends we also use them so there is a friend there with her. Share drop/offs and pick ups makes settling in easier too as they run in together.

Also working from home occasionally and letting them have movie/gaming days.

Can your family come and stay with you in the holidays to help out?

Where I work its not unnusual to see peoples kids at work during the holidays. Not lots of days - that would be taking the piss, but for the occassional day when you cant find anything else its accepted. Sort if an unnoficial "bring your child to work day" (and have them sit quietly in the corner). I can remember my dad bringing us to work as a child and oddly it was a treat. But it does depend on where you work...

@Lancrelady80

A child in my class has parents who work long hours in the tourist and hospitality sector over the summer. She has an extended summer holiday staying with retired grandparents in another part of the country. They see the cousins, get out and about and she has a fantastic time.

Oh this would be so lovely Unfortunately no grandparents

If I were you, I’d take my leave in the bits when state schools aren’t off but yours are. Then you won’t clash so much with others and can visit places (after COVID) when they’re quiet.

Then in the normal school hols holiday clubs will be open and you can use those. Should be affordable if you can afford private school. These probably won’t be open in your additional hols so another reason to take your leave then.

I try to keep ALL my leave for school hols, which my exh sadly doesn’t....

@StephenBelafonte

Can your family come and stay with you in the holidays to help out?

No family

Yy to specific activity camps as a poster said.

A drama club saved my skin by being open — and also fun - in 2020.

Seriously OP 🤦🏻‍♀️ What do you think other working parents do?
We pay for nannies, babysitters, holiday clubs and take time off. If you can afford a private school, you can afford childcare or holiday clubs.