AIBU to be pissed off about constant comments about my cooking?

[9ofpentangles]

Tonight, dinner went a bit wrong and, first, DH complained the potatoes were hard then my Dd and ds.Even though they were, I got annoyed because a) I hate cooking and b) it's every night that someone complains. I get moaned at for cooking the same old stuff so I have been trying different things. Problem is, the first few times often go a bit wrong for me as I am not a natural cook or it msy be a case ofsomeonejust not liking it.

DDs comment particularly stung as she said I didn't care. I admit I had a bit of a strop andshoved everything in the oven again and I might have muttered ihate fucking cooking

To be fair, though, dh is home just before 5 so could cook but doesn't want to come in and start cooking

Plenty of people get home much later than that and manage to cook dinner. I'm sure he won't die if he cooks a couple of nights a week.

@missbridgerton

DH tried to critique my food once. His plate and its contents went into the bin with such force that it broke the plate............ Oddly enough, he's never done it again. Especially as he can't even boil an egg.

Next time, remove the food, scoop into the bin, then sit back down and carry on eating yours. And do it each and every time, they'll soon cotton on. It's incredibly rude of them all, no matter what their ages are.

I've done this, too.

Not DH (his mother was the worst cook I've ever encountered so even the muck I churn out is manna from heaven to him), but the kids have criticised. I dumped their dinners (they weren't babies - they were in their teens) and let them get on with it.

It was either eat what I cooked (and not whinge about it) or open a tin of spaghetti hoops. Guess what they did?

My DS, now an adult, is a superb cook. Adult DD would live on tinned soup and monster munch. Like her mother (me) she hates cooking with a passion.

Nah, wouldn't have it. How destroyed would your kids be if they cooked for you and you reacted like that. You're a human! This is just about common decency.

To be fair, though, dh is home just before 5 so could cook but doesn't want to come in and start cooking.

When's his birthday? Buy him a slow cooker.

Hi op hate it myself. Seems to be my role as home for now. Teens either wont eat it or some issue with it. No point a rota as they out working all day. Husb is as bad. My daughter ate it burgers and oven chips. I love fish they dont. Tired spag bol as u doing seperate stuff then

@mbosnz

How old are they?

You could write a strongly worded resignation letter, citing your dissatisfaction at the lack of contribution and appreciation, meaning that someone else now had to take over the cooking, whether they liked it or not.

Agreed. The next person to complain cooks for a week. After that, everyone takes their turn at doing the catering. That includes all the planning, which I consider is more than 50% of the task.

-To be fair, though, dh is home just before 5 so could cook but doesn't want to come in and start cooking
So why should you?

When I was a child I laughed at Wendy Craig in Butterflies. Now I am Wendy Craig!

YADNBU!

I loathe this expectation that just because you are a woman and a Mum then you need to be the one who feeds everyone every night.

I don't like cooking so the meals we get if I am responsible for feeding us are

• pork loin steaks and green beans - everything goes in the oven on a tray at gas 6 for 25 minutes

• chicken breasts and tenderstem broccoli - everything goes in the oven on a tray at gas 6 for 25 minutes

• hot dogs or burgers - they go on a tray in the oven at gas 5 for 30 minutes

You get the gist 😂 if anyone complains they don't eat it and they cook the next meal. If they want me to cook they get something that can go on a tray and be shoved in the oven to cook for the same amount of time at the same temperature with no faff and limited washing up.

With your DH leading by example it's hardly surprising that they have joined in the comments!

I'd cook tomorrow... Bring your portion in and eat it, when they ask where theirs is I'd just say something like "don't worry, I got the unsubtle hints from you all last night, so you don't have to worry about eating my cooking in future"

Shock factor can work wonders, as can them them having to get in the kitchen to cook!

In the future I'd definitely be getting DH cooking more as it should be more of a team effort, and DC cooking for various reasons like -
Responsibility
Life lessons
Being part of a family means all mucking in
Understanding the work that's gone into a meal and how they'd then feel if someone made nasty remarks

I'd give them a night a week to cook, ask them to do a list of what they need so it can be bought on the weekly shop. It's not a punishment for their behaviour, it's something they should be doing anyway at their age and will help them in the future

At 12 and 16 they can cook once per week each and see how they feel about the criticism. Almost no one wants to cook after a day at work or school but people need to eat so it’s either supermarket stuff reheated, takeaway or someone cooks and having a uterus doesn’t make it a joy. Stir fry, frittata, slow cooker food, there’s loads of things that don’t take ages in the evening.

I feel your pain. I hate cooking too.

My advice is to stop cooking potatoes! Cook pasta, rice (can throw most veg in the same pan for 10 mins boiling), 2 minute polenta, risotto. Find some simple recipes and follow them. We have a kids cook book, super simple but tastes good and the kids can join in and help.

really? One single comment about my cooking and i'd never cook again. nobody would dare!!!

Do up a Rota system now so you all cook every 4th day, regardless of it being a weekday/weekend. I hate cooking, am not great at it but nobody would dare criticise it. I'd definitely down tools if they did.

How about a Mary Berry cookbook? There are several that might fit the bill - Foolproof Cooking / Everyday / Quick Cooking / Simple Comforts.

I once served my kids pasta with peas and sweetcorn every day for two weeks after they complained about my cooking. It took about a week before they even noticed they were getting the same thing every night.

12 and 16? I was prepping food at that age. My dm and df both worked. We’d prep the food before they got home from work and went to the shops for bread, milk, top ups, otherwise we wouldn’t get any pocket money or treat.
No dinner tomorrow and if they ask ‘dog shit on toast is for dinner’.

I thought the kids would be young but 12 and 16?! That would be the last meal from me they would see for a long time. Why cant they cook? Utube will help them if you can't.

YABU not to have a rota. Cooking is a life skill and you will be doing the kids a favour to say they each cook a meal one night a week. After all in a couple of years the 16 year old could be away from home and looking after themselves so the practise will be good.

Encourage them to plan for their night. Reasonable ingredients requirements to be submitted in good time for the weekly shop. They might actually enjoy it.

Then you and DH do two nights each. He is in before 5 do no reason not to. The remaining night - takeaway? Joint effort? Take turns?

Job done. If everyone is having their turn at cooking for the family I would imagine they will be less likely to criticise other people's efforts