To think that I might as well give up job hunting?

[MakkaPakka84]

A bit of background: I came back from maternity leave exactly a year ago. For a variety of reasons (threat of redundancy, sidelining, mobbing) I started looking for another job in a relevant field. But the world went upside down and Covid happened. I have been to five interviews, but didn't get any of the jobs for various reasons (internal candidates, candidates with slightly more experience, etc). The feedback for most of the interviews, however, was glowing and a couple of managers strongly encouraged me to keep trying at the same level.

The truth is, I am exhausted and borderline depressed at this point. I have an almost 2-year-old and when I am not working in my actual job, I am either parenting, job hunting, or preparing for interviews. I spent most of last week putting together a presentation that, despite being excellent for graphics and content, still didn't get me the job.

I feel at crossroads. I would love to move on, but it's just not happening. Perhaps I should give up for the time being and focus on other things? I have considered getting pregnant again and giving my daughter a sibling, but part of me worries that I will never bounce back if I do that (one year of maternity leave, two of pandemic, and another maternity leave...)

Really torn and depressed :(

You're doing better than me because at the moment I am putting off even applying because I am too scared of being rejected!

I would recommend researching and joining a recruitment agency, as they will do a lot of the hard work finding potential jobs and also give you advice on your CV, how to approach interviews etc. Also I had a bit of work mentoring recently and that helped clear my thoughts in terms of what I actually wanted to do, I'm very much at a crossroads too. But finding a recruitment agency is my plan once I have psyched myself up enough. Good luck and don't give up!

LinkedIn is full of people saying they’ve applied for 100s and 100s of jobs and those are ones without a job and a stronger motivation than you to need one. Either make the most of where you are or accept that it’s a very fierce job market out there right now.

@Neighneigh I have found recruitment agencies extremely unhelpful. I think it really depends on the sector you are in - my friend, who works in finance, had a good experience with some recruiters, but I never did for more creative roles. I signed up with two or three agencies and no joy so far - relevant positions on their website are not shared with me, and unsuitable ones are - what a mess!

@Jangle33 I realise I am in a very fortunate position with such high unemployment and a fierce job market out there. I would take the "applied for 100s and 100s of jobs" articles with a pinch of salt though. I once read of a guy who applied for 50 jobs in the same day - he can't have possibly researched the roles and tailored his cover letters accordingly!

@MakkaPakka84 I'm sorry to hear that about agencies, perhaps I've been out of it too long. Are you in the creative sector then? Yonks ago there were some really good ones in London, I found them very helpful. Prospectus got me my last job in London before we moved out.

@Neighneigh marketing/comms/fundraising. I guess it's very much down to the individual recruiters. My finance friend swears by agencies!

You never know how close you are to achieving a goal if you give up now - don't - you'll thank yourself later as it'll be much harder x

I went on what feels like hundreds (realistically more like 7 or so) interviews to get my current job and like you, after everyone, glowing feedback... 'but'.. someone else was always better. And it is soul destroying really because there's not much you can do about that if you're not given specifics of what you can work on to make sure that you are the best next time. And I know it's a cliche to say but just as I was about to give up, I finally got there; I had 3 interviews back to back within a week and the other two told me no and I was going to cancel this interview because I couldn't really face gearing no again but I made myself go and I finally got that job.
My colleague from the previous role is also interested in moving in the same direction that I have done. She's more experienced in our previous job than I was and she was no doubt at all, better than I was. She hasn't managed to get this job yet; she's been on more interviews than I did and when a colleague left my current role she applied for that and she didn't get this one either. Now I know full well that if I was going up against her directly, I would not come out on top. So what I believe is that it really is just a case of keeping going and doing everything YOU can, but accepting that there may always be someone better than you also competing and there's nothing you can do about that. Actually getting the job is as much about 'right place, right time' as it is anything else. But no one will just hand you a job; if you don't try and you don't put yourself out there then no one will ever say yes.

@MakkaPakka84 I'm in very similar fields, do have a look at Prospectus. I live in Yorkshire now but was going to ring them and say now that we all know we don't need to be in the office, is there any chance I can go back on their books.

Also my friend runs a big fundraising FB group, she's at the Red Cross, I'll dig out the name as it could be interesting to monitor?

If you are getting to interviews and getting good feedback from them, it's just a matter of time until one of them becomes an offer. There's clearly no problem with your materials or your skills; it's just going to take a few shots to be the right candidate in the right place at the right time.

That said, if mentally you need a break and you're okay where you are, take one. Give yourself permission to absolutely do nothing on jobhunting, save responding to queries that you've already sent, for two weeks and see how you feel.

You only need one job. So keep trying.

@ScarfaceCwaw very good advice, thanks. It's easy to feel demoralised and forget that in happier, non Covid-times, I would have probably been able to move on. What I am finding really hard is getting back to square one every single time. Often a single application entails two or three stages, presentations, etc.: it's a lot of work put in, when you have to do it again and again and again.

On a more personal note, I am also worried about having wasted an entire year. I am not exactly young anymore, and ideally I would have liked to start trying for another baby in a year or two. So part of me also worries about finally getting a great job, and then either having to disappoint them, or putting off ttc until it's too late.

Don't ever put your life off for a job. I TTCed my first when I didn't even have a job! (I'm not saying j recommend that, especially right now, and WOW when I look back it was a risk, but I got away with it!) I accepted a new job when I was 12 weeks pregnant and started at 16 weeks. They were surprised when I told them, but it all worked out fine. A skilled hire is a long term investment. I know it's not so easy to balance jobs and babies, but you'll be able to work it all out somehow.

It is a tougher than usual market out there as there are so many good people at a loose end. It sounds like you are doing great to be getting multiple interviews, although I know the process is exhausting. Hang in there.

I absolutely could have written this. I’m in the same situation but with no job to go back to and my maternity leave has ended and any hope of getting a job in my specialised field. I’m in a fortunate position in that I could get a job in a wider field but at a huge pay cut with no guarantee to ever get back to this point. I have no words of wisdom but have taken on board the previous comments and am preparing myself for an interview this afternoon. It’s just so hard to find any motivation. Do keep trying but only when you feel ready and good luck. It will be very hard to start to a new job without any clear headspace.

I completely understand OP, job hunting is soul destroying at the moment.

Despite COVID, I spent pretty much the whole of last year applying for jobs and interviewing. I’d grown to really dislike my current role. I must’ve done about 7 interviews and I was only offered one of them - Sod’s law, the interviewers were awful and the company seemed horrible, so I didn’t go for it. There was one role that I really wanted that I didn’t get, and I was so upset about it. I work in a similar field, marketing/comms.

I decided to take a complete break from it all over Christmas and New Year and I felt so much better for it. I applied for a job in February and accepted an offer a few weeks ago - I start next week

It can and will happen. You’re getting interviews and your feedback is good. Hang in there, and take a break for a few weeks if you need to!

Gosh, can you good people put some more inspiring tales up? I am where OP is now as had to recently decline a job offer due to covid/family caring and cannot muster up any energy for what seems like a mountain to climb only to find a job without bullying/constant stress and poor pay.

I hadn't worked in ten years. Single parent to three children. Have been applying on and off throughout but nothing. Then I got a job a month ago! The irony of having got a job through a pandemic when the country is in economic upheaval, despite having tried and been unsuccessful for so many years is not lost on me!!

I’m in the same boat and a similar field, OP. It’s soul-destroying and demoralising to put so much work into something and get to final interview, repeatedly, then end up back at square one.

All I can say is that if we’re getting to interview, it’s just a numbers game: at some point we’ll get the job. To keep my head up, I do take time out from the application treadmill – it’s such hard work tailoring letters and forms and CVs and extra materials (and I agree someone applying to 50 jobs isn’t doing that!), that every couple of weeks I just hit “pause”: stop checking LinkedIn/Glassdoor/The Dots/etc, stop checking my job alert email account, stop applying. Just a few days self-care then I’m ready to go again.

I started this week with a rejection after final interview, but I’ve got 4 interviews lined up and two applications I’m excited about. If they all go nowhere, I’ll take next week off and do something fun, like drink 800 bottles of wine.

I don’t think it would be the worst idea to have the next baby, though! You can’t put your life on hold. We’re going to start trying for No2 this summer, come hell or high water (I’m ancient and it’s gotta be done). I think in future employers will easily understand a massive job gap around 2020-2022, it’s not like covid and a global recession have gone unnoticed.

@burritofan best of luck for your interviews, 4 in a row - wow! That will take a lot of stamina, but the odds are in your favour

Your advice is really useful, pressing a mental "reset" button will work wonders.

As for baby n. 2, we shall see. As @ScarfaceCwaw was saying, it's unwise to put important life events on hold for a job. I'm ancient too and I don't want to leave a huge gap between DD and the baby - it would be hard to readjust to the baby stage. At the same time, I haven't been in a "proper" office for two years now - it feels very strange and detached, and I would love a bit of normality before starting another maternity leave....

@30scrisis

Mad, isn’t it? I wonder if people are hesitant to commit to anything at the moment? (Not that you didn’t get the job on merit)

@MakkaPakka84 yes, to the advice about not putting life on hold for a job

Aww OP, I feel your pain. I got made redundant last year on top of a relationship breakdown and losing my house/ car and everything.

Luckily got taken back on at a former pub I worked at in my teens but it’s not a job I ever wanted to go back into although I’m grateful I had employment.

I’ve been applying for 100’s of jobs weekly since last august and honestly felt so fed up with my life, not one interview for jobs in my fields and it was making my depression worse. I really felt like giving up on applying as I was fed up but as of this week, the one and only interview I’ve had in the past 100’s of jobs I’ve applied for. I have finally been offered a really good job in my field of expertise and for a really good company!

It’s taken months and months but things are finally looking up. I know it’s difficult but something will come up, just keep trying 😊 x

@RatsolutelyFabulous. Brilliant result - well done

@LadyfromtheBelleEpoque Thank you😊

[quote LadyfromtheBelleEpoque]@30scrisis

Mad, isn’t it? I wonder if people are hesitant to commit to anything at the moment? (Not that you didn’t get the job on merit)[/quote]
No idea at all! I mean I have recent 2:1 degree qualifications which is great and it's in the line of work that I've qualified in. I think my thing may have been that the interview was over teams. My nerves normally take over horrendously so I think this helped. I do think people are scared to move jobs though with the current situation.