To be fecking fecked off with DH's fag hands on remote, phone, dog, my hair
SheDroveA2CV · 19/03/2021 22:35
I've had enough of the fags!!!!! Can't bear it anymore and the "it's a habit" "I'll try to give up" shit. It's driving me fecking insane!!!!!!! The smell. The coughing up every morning. The fag butts in the garden. I put them on a plate. Nothing is working. He just doesn't want to give up. Do I just accept and live with it? I have told him he needs to stop smoking.
dotdotdotdash · 19/03/2021 22:43
Feck off @HennyLenry
I know it's a horrible habit @SheDroveA2CV but he has to do it for himself. Has he ever tried to quit? From personal experience, it takes a few attempts to quit. Fail... fail better etc. Don't try to make him feel bad but keep up the pressure!
Tankflybosswalkjam · 19/03/2021 22:46
You have my sympathies. My ex promised faithfully to give up when we had a baby, ok maybe the next baby, ok at new year, ok when it’s quieter at work, ok when the planets are auspiciously aligned. He never did though. He just likes smoking. And fuck everyone else.
waitingpatientlyforspring · 19/03/2021 22:47
It was always a deal breaker for me. DH was a social smoker when we met but he knew I hated so didn't smoke around me and only his mates. As time went on he saw less of his mates and when smoking in pubs was banned he gave up. I always hated him coming home from a night out, it was disgusting and I know I couldn't have managed if he smoked regularly.
It's difficult to change if you have always accepted it.
HalzTangz · 19/03/2021 22:47
100% agree, my partner knew I smoked when he met me, and all he does is moan (he forgets he's not perfect himself), stench of his farts for a start 🤣🤣
I don't feel people should force others to stop doing something if they knew that person was doing that when they met
QueenBodicea · 19/03/2021 23:06
I feel your pain. We have the most cutest and affectionate of kittens who i love to cuddle but if DP, a smoker, has just been stroking him the poor kitten smells of smoke. Horrid!
Its worse with lockdown as we are both working from home and so we are just exposed to his smoke more. He only smokes in the garden but it seems to blow into the house when he comes back in.
NailsNeedDoing · 20/03/2021 10:49
He’s only telling you that he’ll try to give up because you keep nagging him about it. Clearly, he doesn’t want to give up any time soon.
I’m a smoker and I kind of assume that at some point in life I’ll feel like I want to give up, but for now, I don’t want to, so simply wouldn’t be able to. I’m not sure why you think ‘I’ve told him he needs to stop smoking’ is relevant, people have never been able to give up addictions that they want to continue just because other people have told them they shouldn’t do it.
Merryoldgoat · 20/03/2021 11:17
You cannot change anyone’s behaviour. He doesn’t want to stop smoking so decide if it’s a dealbreaker or not then make your decision, but it’s not acceptable to constantly tell him to stop.
I’m an ex smoker. I stopped as I needed an operation and never started again but I do have the odd cigarette when pissed.
I smoked when I met my DH - he didn’t like it but absolutely accepted it.
murbblurb · 20/03/2021 11:21
even addicts can avoid dropping litter, he's rather a skank, isn't he? He could at least pick up his muck.
if he was a turd-burner when you got together I'm afraid you signed up for this. If you no longer want to (and I wouldn't blame you) then he doesn't have to change but you know what you need to do.
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