Can my 13 year old drop out of School.?

[Schoolissues1]

Hi there,
My son has struggled with school for various reasons and despite having ADHD, even with the support of the school, he just hates it. We've taken on board advice, tips and strategies to help him but we have hit a wall.

He gets extremely anxious, and has started to play truant.

The only thing he loves and excels in is sport.

We can't home school him due to our jobs and other children.

Does anyone know if at this age the can go to an alternative school that focuses more on sport, and just offer a basic curriculum I.e maths and English GCSE.

Or any other options.?

Many thanks

Does he have an EHCP?

He can't just drop out without alternative provision. Have you spoken to the school about what else he or they might be able to do?

You can remove him to homeschool him but he can not just stop going to school. I also would not recommend this until you have explored a few different options.

You need to make an appointment in the first instance with your Senco and Head of Year to discuss your son's anxiety and school refusal and together make a plan of action. There may be things in school they can do to help, including EHCP, to get extra support and/or alternative education. (warning though this is a long process and not quick).

Unless you have the means to access private education?

No, we went private for a psychiatrist in children mental health, who gave him an assessment and her findings was that he had ADHD, but he needed an official assessment. Then Covid happened and we cant afford the next part.

The waiting list is 2yrs plus long unless we go private

If assessment suggested he could cope in mainstream it is unlikely he could go to a special school. If he truants repeatedly he may well end up excluded and at a pru which may not be ideal and tends to lead to lower aspiration and academic qualifications. An ehcp may identify a specific school which might be more suitable but few are actually sport orientated. Are there any local fe colleges with a 14-16 programme?

I don't think there are any schools that focus more on sport with just a basic curriculum. There are a handful of private schools that are sport focused but they are also academic and also very expensive. There are also Pupil Referral Units but sports provision at those is patchy.

Thank you for all your replies. We really have tried all the above.

School cant do no more than they are doing.

Due to a trauma when he was younger, I think he has a lot going on inside his head. Hes had counselling and has therapy sessions at his school.

I feel we have exhausted all options

My son goes to a state school that has a cricket and a football academy and children who wouldn't ordinarily be eligible for a place at the school can get in yo the school through being selected as having talent in these sports. They still have to do the full curriculum though.

If he enjoys sport could his participation be linked to better school attendance?

What's an FE college @lizz?

I dont like sending him in knowing it makes him frustrated, angry and anxious. Hence why I'm looking at other options. But it seems I'm limited.

Further Education college.

Quite often home educated children will access GCSEs through 14-16 provision at an FE college.

Sorry you are going through this,my dd is also school refusing. She is on a reduced timetable, do talk to senco.
She is in a very long wait list for asc assessment with cahms but we have applied for echp and she has got through initial 6 week assessment . You do nit need a diagnosis to apply for echp.
I also applied for DLA for DD and was awarded it, its a painful form to complete but was worth it.
We will use the money to go towards private help fir her while we wait for cahms.
There is an excellent thread on here called something like parents of anxious children/ teens support thread they have provided lots of information and support to me

Hi. Similar situation here. Our son is 15 in June. Forecast level 2 in GCSE's.
Perhaps de register ? are you working from home ? He might like one of the military colleges from 15/16? or maybe a uniformed services course at college ?

Have you looked at local studio schools and university technical colleges near you that he could transfer to at 14? He might prefer taking vocational/technical subjects alongside the core GCSE subjects and the work experience that they offer.

Not sure where you are but here they can leave and go to collage at 14 they still do maths and english but can focus on what subject they want my ds13 has asked todo this. He also us into sports and only day heroes to school happy is p.e day.

@Schoolissues1

I dont like sending him in knowing it makes him frustrated, angry and anxious. Hence why I'm looking at other options. But it seems I'm limited.

Another school would be fine.

• He goes not heroes.

@Sweettea1

Not sure where you are but here they can leave and go to collage at 14 they still do maths and english but can focus on what subject they want my ds13 has asked todo this. He also us into sports and only day heroes to school happy is p.e day.

Where are you?

I was also going to mention seeing if there is a UTC (university technical college) near you. They start at 14, and while they won’t have a sports focus, outside of the core subjects they take a more practical, vocational angle which might suit your son better. Definitely worth looking into.

I was going to say there are some college courses they can start at 14, particularly vocational courses.

Where in the country are you? I work for a small independent alternative education provision that works with children who cannot access school. They provide a holistic 1-1 education for children like your son who are struggling. It is funded by the child’s LEA. They are based in West Sussex but work within quite a large radius.

Utc s had a bad press, are there any left now? Yes I meant Further Education colleges, sometimes their 14-16 courses are offered to students also attending other secondaries or on a stand alone basis. The environment suits some but not all.

There is one UTC not too far from me that has a fantastic reputation. The JCB Academy. But most of them failed miserably to give any kind of decent education.

You may be able to cobble together a solution which works for him via home education. There are many misconceptions about how home ed works. Parents don't have to teach their children, and if they do provide instruction to them it doesn't have to be during the usual school hours. If you are imagining sitting with him at the dining table six hours a day, it doesn't have to be like that. Maybe it could work for you after all.

There are practical and emotional challenges to this in your situation, as it probably wouldn't be good for your son to be alone all day every day, but it is worth considering whether you could come up with something. For example, some parents work different hours from their partner, or do some hours from home, so they can be around for their kids - not necessarily giving their teens their full attention during the day but just being on hand. Grandparents or other relatives might be able to spend time with him for a day a week, say. You could hire a childminder (perhaps even a home educating childminder who also has teens) to take him out places during the day while you are at work. Then do any formal education with him at times when you aren't working; that takes relatively few hours when it is one-to-one and focused on the young person's interests. As others have mentioned, some colleges have part-time or full-time programmes for 14-16 year olds. He can work part-time or volunteer; you do need to comply with child labour laws, of course.

For example, during weekday daytimes my eldest used to do art and music at home, some gaming, some reading, going swimming and meeting up with friends sometimes independently and sometimes with me. Then after school, loads of sports and choirs, as well as quite a range of paid and voluntary work to learn about future careers and acquire some skills. With school out of the equation there is plenty of time for all that. The consequence was a decent CV and set of skills in their area of interest. They originally planned to go straight into work without qualifications, but ended up doing English and maths GCSE aged 19/20 and then to uni.

Harder if you and your partner both work full-time away from home, but it still may be possible to figure something out.