Can my 13 year old drop out of School.?

[Schoolissues1]

Hi there,
My son has struggled with school for various reasons and despite having ADHD, even with the support of the school, he just hates it. We've taken on board advice, tips and strategies to help him but we have hit a wall.

He gets extremely anxious, and has started to play truant.

The only thing he loves and excels in is sport.

We can't home school him due to our jobs and other children.

Does anyone know if at this age the can go to an alternative school that focuses more on sport, and just offer a basic curriculum I.e maths and English GCSE.

Or any other options.?

Many thanks

I know a boy who was a right little shit in school, kicked out of multiple, but he was sent to college early (because he literally ran out of schools to go to) and he settled into college well. You get treated more as an adult rather than a child and he sorted himself out a little. Option?

Army cadets?

There are lots of online schools that offer the chance to gain qualifications or you could focus on one or two subjects per year supported by a tutor allowing him time to participate in other activities

Home education may well be the answer but don't expect to take him out, recreate school at home and have him engaging with his learning within 3 weeks because it won't happen. He's most likely utterly disengaged from learning and would need a lot of time to heal and reengage. I have a 16yr old (dyslexic and strong ASD traits - no dx as he didn't want to have the assessment) who has been home Ed since he was 11. He suffered PTSD from his time in school and has taken a long time to regain his confidence and self esteem. He is now starting to really engage in his future and consider that he's able to and wants to do some qualification. Remember learning is LIFELONG and good mental health is absolutely completely imperative to a successful adulthood - say this as the sibling of someone who had qualifications coming out of their ears but could never hold down a job or relationship due to poor mental health and took their own life aged 38.

Go to educational freedom.org read around home education. Read around unschooling. Remember he has many years to get qualifications if he needs them. Life isn't a race! Good luck!!

School refusal is real, where children refuse to attend then local authorities help.

But home education is also an option.

It will depend where you live as to what facilities you have but there are various options for 14+ (Year 10).
UTC - University Technical College. These start at Yr 10 and students take GCSEs but it's usually more specialised so a smaller curriculum.
Studio Schools - smaller versions of UTC that are usually part of a school or run by a school.
Local College (Further Education College) - normally for 16 -19 year olds but some have schemes especially for 14 year olds. They would have to take English and Maths GCSEs but then less formal/academic options will be available.
You need to contact your local Education Authority to find out what there is in your area.

Due to a trauma when he was younger, I think he has a lot going on inside his head. Hes had counselling and has therapy sessions at his school.

Hey OP this stood out to me. What sort of therapy/counselling has he had/is having? If it is general then it may not be hitting the mark. Trauma needs specialised work. Especially if a few years later it's still impacting the child (or adult).

I'm very much for traditional assessments etc as a first port of call. However, it seems you've done all this and it's not working for your son. So I'd suggest looking at it in alternative ways. I would recommend Bessel van der Kolk's The Body Keeps the Score to help you understand trauma (he was a psychiatrist who headed up the Harvard Trauma Institute so well-informed).

Peter Levine also is good for this and has a book about kids and trauma, but I haven't read it https://www.amazon.co.uk/Trauma-Through-Childs-Eyes-Awakening/dp/1556436300/ref=mpssa115?dchild=1&keywords=peter+levine+books&qid=1616137674&sprefix=peter+levine&sr=8-5

If your son still has a lot going on in his mind from earlier trauma, it's entirely understandable that he's not able to concentrate and enjoy school. Imagine trying to learn new things and do tests when you're very stressed about something else.

Sadly I think you may need to do the reading on this rather than rely on therapists' advice right now, because you're actually a specialist in your son's behaviour.

Also look at trauma-informed classrooms in the US. There were some studies done where teachers changed how they dealt with classrooms in which there was a likelihood of many kids having suffered trauma. The kids went from not concentrating and having low academic outcomes to improving in all fronts. I'm in a rush so cant search right now.

None of this may be appropriate, but there is a reflection of some of these things in what you've said so it might be worth taking a look.

OP Is your DS medicated for ADHD?

@littlewhitestar

Have you looked at local studio schools and university technical colleges near you that he could transfer to at 14? He might prefer taking vocational/technical subjects alongside the core GCSE subjects and the work experience that they offer.

I was going to suggest this too

In my area FE colleges will take 14/15 year old children.