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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed by not being allowed to view a house unless my house is sold.

220 replies

LemonSwan · 15/03/2021 17:08

I found a house I potentially really like, although its very unusual so absolutely have to view it to be able to be certain. It could be a disaster.

Apparently I need to have sold my house to view it!?

Our non negotiable requirements are very unusual and do not come up regularly (c. once every 3 months). I have been looking for a long time and only viewed 3 houses which were discounted because one was riddled with damp smell, another the seller was just pretending to sell (trying to get the agri tie removed), and the other looked bigger in the pictures.

What would you do in my shoes?

Voting:

YABU - Put my house on the market and sell it just so I can view this house which may be a complete non starter.

YANBU - Or just forget it and move on.

OP posts:
Alsohuman · 15/03/2021 22:10

When did you last move @LemonSwan? It’s absolutely standard now.

Original poster
LemonSwan · 15/03/2021 22:12
  1. I have been looking for the last year and seen 3 potential properties, or 4 if you include this one.
OP posts:
GuacamoleParty · 15/03/2021 22:14

Classic posting on AIBU even though you clearly don't want to hear any opinions or comments you disagree with Hmm

Original poster
LemonSwan · 15/03/2021 22:15

I have taken the opinion polls position. Its 52% forget about it and move on which is where I am currently at as well.

OP posts:
MrMucker · 15/03/2021 22:18

@LemonSwan

You must know whether it’s a goer or not from videos, floorplans, photos etc?

We are not really buying for the house per say. Its the land, the drive, the outhouses etc. (have a business which needs to be accommodated). Its the package we are excited about. The house itself is OK, not amazing in the pictures but with a refurbishment could be lovely (possibly slightly small in an ideal world but we cant have it all when we have these other requirements) - if we get a good feeling about the whole thing as a package then we would jump in both feet. But I really cant tell you that unless I went.

TDLR - has everything we require on paper - which is a lot and unusual. House is a bit weird but could be lovely in an exciting quirky way.

You already have form in not being able to understand what is on paper, because you said one viewing didn't work out because it wasn't as big as it looked in the advert. All property adverts give floor plans and measurements, so what it "looks like" is irrelevant. But you went to view it anyway and were then disappointed with the size. How? You were given the measurements.. You don't really sound as if you have a clue what you are doing, and also seem to think that a bit of window shopping for a house does not have to impact on the current residents of that house. You are not a serious buyer and you don't seem to understand how a chain situation works. You sell first, then you view.
cansu · 15/03/2021 22:26

seems ridiculous. Drop a note in explaining with your number.

Original poster
LemonSwan · 15/03/2021 22:26

Haha this is getting ridiculous now. I trained in Architecture MrMucker so I do absolutely know how to read a plan thank you. Not all houses all rooms are created equally.

Right I think I will take the advice of the majority and in the spirit of the day also forget about this thread and move.

Enjoy frothing about the cheek of someone not wanting to potentially start a whole fake chain for the sake of viewing a house.

Brew
OP posts:
RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 15/03/2021 22:28

@Alsohuman

When did you last move *@LemonSwan*? It’s absolutely standard now.
Im tempted to agree that it must depend on the area/agents/homeowner, friends of mine were looking about 5/6 months ago and they didn’t have their house on the market

We looked at a house two weeks ago and we weren’t on the market

GinaJaffacake · 15/03/2021 22:44

When the EA says 'sold' they don't mean that the transaction has completed. They mean 'offer accepted from a procedable buyer'.
@Slippy78, yes, I understand that but if I wait until I’ve got my house under offer then it could take 2,3 or 4wks for me to then find a house I want by which time my sale should be so well advanced that they’d be out of sync.

Slippy78 · 15/03/2021 22:53

I understand that but if I wait until I’ve got my house under offer then it could take 2,3 or 4wks for me to then find a house I want by which time my sale should be so well advanced that they’d be out of sync.
Not if you do things properly. You don't spend any money on mortgages, surveys, valuations etc. until the chain is complete.

cariaaad · 15/03/2021 22:54

I was casually looking but my house wasn't on the market. Saw 2 houses I liked for sale next door to each other. One let me view, the other refused as mine wasn't on the market. I made an offer on the one I saw, had an open day for my house 10 days later, 13 people came on that day and 3 offered.

House sold and moved in 3.5 months later. House next door still not sold.

I guess you might get some people just coming for a nosey but you don't know everyone's circumstances, I knew mine would sell quickly. People who only let you look if you are under offer may well be missing out in my opinion.

CeibaTree · 15/03/2021 23:36

I wonder if the vendors actually want to move if they have instructed their estate agent to be so obstructive? Could be a divorcing couple where one of them doesn't want to move? It is a real pain the the arse to tidy up for a viewing though so maybe they just can't be bothered to do that any more for people not in a position to make an immediate offer.

ConquestEmpireHungerPlague · 15/03/2021 23:49

It's difficult because I can see why sellers/ agents stipulate this but on the other hand you don't want to find a buyer for your house and then mess them around with months of hunting for your own dream house.

Exactly, and it's as if all these people saying they only want 'proceedable' buyers viewing their houses are basically announcing themselves as the most important person in the chain, which hardly bodes well for engaging in a potentially complex transaction with them. I know restricting viewing to people who are under offer is the vogue now, but tbh I would be extremely wary of a seller like this - it would have to be my dream home on paper before I jumped through hoops like that, particularly in the OP's position. If the house in question's been on the market for two years I also think beggars can't be choosers! I like the suggestion upthread to put a note through the door and see what happens.

GinaJaffacake · 16/03/2021 00:11

@Slippy78, no, I disagree. I have only ever agreed to accept an offer from a potential buyer if they’re all set to go. Mortgage in place and willing to book a survey within 7 days. I have always made this a condition of acceptance and once put my house back on the market after 2wks when the buyers hadn’t yet booked a survey. I’ve also pulled out of a purchase when the sellers where faffing around trying to order copies of the buildings regs for an extension. I mean, why wouldn’t you have all that ready before going in the market? No way would I be delaying. If I’m selling I’ve already got all the paperwork needed in a file ready to send to my solicitor the next working day. If I’m buying my mortgage is in place and my solicitor is poised to start searches. I book a survey within a couple of days and keep in constant contact. This is how everyone should buy and sell. There should be no waiting or getting around to sorting mortgage/survey etc. So if I’ve accepted an offer before looking then I’m going to have a mismatch unless I create a delay which if I was my buyer I wouldn’t accept so why should they?

Snookie00 · 16/03/2021 00:35

Come to this really late it have you asked them if you can do an outside viewing of the gardens, land etc and not go in the house? If the interior can be seen on video etc then surely that combined with seeing the land will inform you whether it’s a goer?

GreyhoundG1rl · 16/03/2021 00:49

Even in non Covid times it was quite usual not to engage with people who hadn't even started to market their own house.

RavingAnnie · 16/03/2021 00:52

God I hope this is just because of covid. I'll never be able to move if that continues to be the case. We looked for a year for this house!! No buyers going to hold on that long!

mikulkin · 16/03/2021 01:02

OP there is a third option. Just say to agent that you are not depending on sale of your house and can raise mortgage anyway. Go and look at it, if you like it, you can sell your house in a week as you say and nobody will be upset about your initial lie.
I find it ridiculous that they don’t want to show house or outside area without your house being sold. It is not a usual practice and I would generally avoid such sellers.

SavannahLands · 16/03/2021 01:23

When we bought our house the process required a Deposit as a mark.of good faith that we were able to buy, including having financial checks done, provisional.offer of Mortgage, and that we were sold subject to contract with our own property, with the contract actually signed a couple of weeks or so before, making it a binding sale.. The balance of the monies were actually paid on move in day, known as Completion date.
How things have changed, today it's more a case of exchanging contracts and completing the sale on the same day, no upfront deposit, and a nightmare due to the uncertainty should something to wrong at the final.hour, and having the removals company waiting outside ready to clear the place as soon as the buyers funding drops into your bank account. This also makes good business for the short term rentals and storage industries, should anything go wrong at the final hour, you could find yourself temporarily homeless!

Bythemillpond · 16/03/2021 01:54

I can understand them saying you can only view if you have a buyer for your own house if you were selling a standard property like you own which will sell in a week

Dismissing viewers who own the standard sell in a week house from viewing and finding they might want to buy a quirky property that has been on the market for 2 years is short sighted.

Recently viewed a house in a very nice area that had been on the market for 2 years.

I tried to bid on it but the agent was having none of it and was trying to compare a 1980s semi which needed work with the stone cottages of similar size.
I thought the place was worth around £175,000. It was up for just over £200,000 but the agent said his clients really were hoping for more than asking.
It is still up for sale

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 16/03/2021 07:23

OP Have you spoken to the agent and fully explained your circumstances?

I would e mail them, say you understand the current protocols but you are looking for something very particular that hardly ever comes up. Send them pics of your own house and ask how quickly they think it would sell were you to make an offer, but say you do not wish to waste an EA and potentially buyers time just to get to see a property.

You can’t compare buying in pre-COVID times with now. All EAs are doing this because every viewing carries risk for viewers, vendors abd EAs.

Xmasfairy86 · 16/03/2021 07:41

@RufustheSniggeringReindeer

We are in a similar position in that our house should sell very quickly but houses in the price bracket we are looking for are fairly rare

Yes thats our issue

And ours.

We decided Friday we were going to move. Didn’t even think about putting ours on the market until I spoke to some estate agents about viewing and were told we couldn’t until we were proceed-able. We could take weeks/months to find somewhere!!

MessagesKeepGettingClearer · 16/03/2021 07:52

Have you considered slipping a note in, explaining that you're very interested but that you can't risk putting your house on the market yet as it's only really this house you're interested in? Ask if they'd mind you having a peak at the grounds etc.

They may not mind.

Otherwise you're going to have to adjust your plans if you're ever going to move.

FedNlanders · 16/03/2021 07:55

We rent. Never been asked for proof.

MrsTabithaTwitchit · 16/03/2021 08:00

We are also in the same situation. Our house is pretty saleable and we have no mortgage. We are at the point of having constant hassle from agents wanting us to sell as there is so little on the market. But there is nothing to buy on the market at all , the system is completely broken we really need a new way or buying and selling, it is ridiculous that so many people have to rent in the middle . Friends in California bought and sold in a weekend and moved a few weeks later it all seemed so easy compared to our ridiculous system.