I envy you. You can still sit and watch tv and drink coffee in peace. Enjoy it whilst it lasts.

[MoanyMonday]

This nugget of advice is what a parent in my antenatal group has just told me when I mentioned my 15 month old cannnot walk yet. He's been cruising for about 8 months and crawling since he was 6 months old but because he cannot yet walk I'm apparently spending my days sitting on a sofa drinking coffee and watching netflix. I'm honestly baffled at what she thinks he is doing whilst I do these things.

So given that I'm clearly not knowledgeable on having a toddler who actually toddles am I being unreasonable and woefully naive? I was actually hoping my life would be much easier when he can finally walk. Is it really a million times harder having a walker compared to a child who can crawl at the speed of light, navigate the stairs and competently climb onto and then launch himself off a sofa.

Also any advice as I have clearly been parenting my non walker wrong all this time. What is this magic trick I'm missing for keeping him in one place as I have shows to catch up on and I'd blooming love to not have to wait until he's napping to enjoy a cuppa.

Maybe it's just mine, but early walking meant constant crashing down and falling on things.

Honestly I'd be very impressed if he was as bumped and bruised as he is currently, he looks like he's been in a boxing ring. I'm actually fully expected him to get up and walk one day like he's been doing it for years with little to no wobbling.

Both of mine walked around 15 to 17 months. Both were really hard work until they did due to the endless complaining they did! I'd have found the comment irritating.

The second is now 17 months and is a complete handful, keeps moving things from room to room and climbing everything. But she's happier

And yes as someone said they walk better more quickly at this stage than if they started earlier (I'm sure this won't apply to absolutely everyone).

My DD used a baby walker and that started her walking well. She soon realised she could walk it to wherever she wanted to go and put things on the tray.

She unwittingly hit a nerve, that's all.

All the while saying I’m only seeing one POV.
Make it make sense.

DS1 walked at 23 months (19 months corrected). When he was around 20 months old, and all the other babies in the NCT group were bombing around independently at one of our meet ups (running rather than just walking), I asked one of the other mums how long it had taken her DD to go from standing to unsupported walking. “Oh I don’t know” she says “I can’t remember - it was so long ago!” I was utterly devastated that DS1 was so clearly so far behind the others. And yet I don’t think she meant anything by it at all and certainly didn’t mean to be dismissive or hurtful.

When DS1 was about six months old and still smaller than a newborn, a very friendly lady in the queue in Waitrose asked me about him and I explained briefly that he’d been born 4 months early and had been in NICU for 17 weeks. She replied how fantastic that must have been for me and DH as we’d missed all the sleepless nights! She was just being friendly though. I was so stunned that I wasn’t even offended with that one!

Please don’t take it to heart OP. I’m laughing with you at the thought that you sit around doing nothing all day except drinking coffee and watching TV!

The only woman I would say a comment like that to is a woman who is pregnant!
Otoh when I was pregnant I was sick 24/7 for the entire time until about 2 hours after birth each time. Even the smell of coffee made me throw up, so maybe you shouldn't say it when pregnant.
However I found the early stage of babyhood easy with all of them, so I did have lots of sitting down cuddles.

Definitely better when they walk.

You have to keep more of an eye on them but IME they are in a MUCH better mood as they are so pleased with themselves.

My son in particular was so grumpy in the weeks leading up to walking.

I have a DS who walked at 10 months and DD who started at 16 months. It was certainly easier and less tiring to look after DD - which was lucky as DS was an extremely demanding child - he is still hard work and he's nearly 16 now.

@dropthedeadhorse your friend doesn't realise that toddlers that talk well don't STFU.

OP my DD didn't do that when she could crawl and her personality didn't change as soon as she could walk.

CatkinToadflax I'm very impressed you managed to bite your tongue with the nicu comment I dont think I would have been as restrained.

I shall indeed try not to take it to heart.

My son in particular was so grumpy in the weeks leading up to walking.

DS is an almost permanently grumpy beast. He is content for a few days after learning a new skill and then reverts back to his natural pessimistic self. I'm sincerely hoping he has an extended personality transplant when he does indeed learn to walk as it's clearly been frustrating him for months.

Yes it’s hard having a crawler/early walker. Just as it’s hard having a newborn! It’s hard in a different way. You work around it and find your peace and quiet where you can. Each child is different and comparison is the thief of joy (as they say).

Nothing irks me more than the “just you wait” mum brigade. Like you haven’t got a clue what parenting is until your child starts crawling/weaning/toddling/playing the cello/qualifying for MENSA. My SIL is terrible for it. Bloody irritating. Honestly I think all new mums need to become skilled at selective deafness.

@PeteWicksSexyPirate

Sounds like the other parent was trying to be nice, not put you down

Yup. Pleasant small talk. I almost certainly said similar at some point. I do remember saying I was hoping my subsequent DC were late walkers because I didn't fancy a little tribe of small walking people creating havoc.

I honestly wouldn’t take offence. I always remember DD sitting on her bum every week in baby sensory while all her little NCT pals crawled about getting into mischief. My mum friends used to say they envied me as they were running about while I enjoyed my cuppa.

DD crawled eventually then walked at 16 months, she’s now two and runs terrifyingly fast.

If anyone ever mentioned her not walking yet I used to say “I’m fully confident she’ll be walking into primary school”. It’s so silly I didn’t entertain it.