To change my 7 year old’s school?

[ThornAmongstRoses]

AIBU to consider taking my 7 year out of his school and placing him in another purely because I think the other school is a better one for him?

Me and my husband have had some concerns about our son’s current school and despite raising them twice and being given reassurances by his teacher and HOY, nothing has changed.

There is another school nearby (though not as convenient as his current school) which has a fantastic reputation, I know there’s space in his year group if we were to transfer him, but the thought of taking him away from his friends is hard to make peace with.

Has anyone else moved their child in similar circumstances and it turned out ok?

Me and my husband just don’t know what to do for the best.

And sorry not making him do his homework is a crappy example to set. He can do it it so make him do it.

What extra curricular is he doing? There's loads even in lockdown.. instrument? Art? Beavers etc?
There's loads more ways to challenge a child

Also has the school got a high% of children needing extra help? Is this impacting it?
Ours is repeating a lot of work as despite being a leafy middle class suburb, a lot of parents have struggled to home school when working flat out.
If avoid focusing too much on maths right now and look at developing wider knowledge

I think your expecting too much.everything has massively changed since March last year. It’s like Jenga. Poor teachers are desperately trying to fill the gaps, let alone add more levels for the more academically brighter child.

I think you you’re expecting too much, unfairly actually.

Send him to a private school. I think you’ll fit right in there

He’s just come home with a certificate for doing his 5 and 10 times tables correctly today.

He was doing those time tables 6 months ago yet here they still are, still doing the same thing.

In fact he was doing harder work than that twelve months ago just before the schools first closed.

There’s just no moving forward.

I get there’s a pandemic on but I’m sorry, having children still be doing the exact same level of work they were doing 12 months ago just isn’t right.

He said it took him 27 seconds to answer the 30 questions he was set, (he likes to time himself because he sets himself targets to reach) and that he was then given a book to read whilst he waited for the others to finish

I’m really tempted to do as someone suggested above, and just send in work for him to do at the level he’s capable of. That seems so passive aggressive though.

Your child should be pushed a lot more, he should be getting higher order extension work.

Do extra with him at home, the teacher is a bit out of her depth possible at the minute of she is an NQT she is coping with the new levels of admin that go along with the job as well as her planning.

I see that you have already approached her a couple of times, I'd approach her again and ask if he could be stretched a little more as he is starting to get reluctant to learn as there is a lack of challenge and then if still no change maybe speak to someone else as your concerns aren't being taken on board.

If it is just one teacher I'd try to extend him as much as possible at home and ride it out until he finished this year and the next teacher might be better.

Don't send in your own work, that is a massive dick move and you would immediately cast yourself in a very poor light for future teachers.

I'd also advise try not to project your displeasure about the teacher's lack of competence in front of your son. If kids hear parents being dismissive of other adults they very quickly learn they can too. From what you have shared your son is displaying some traits of this.

Agree with the poster above. Try having another word with his teacher, but I wouldn’t send in your own work. Maths extensions would make more sense than giving him reading every time. It shouldn’t be that difficult to arrange, but maybe the class teacher is struggling at the moment - and the children have only been back in school a week. Is your son streets ahead of all others in the class or might be a small group of children who can work together on maths extensions? This is the sort of thing I’d be asking the teacher.

If the teacher won't give more challenging work, I'd go to the head. If that still doesn't work, then I'd either send in the harder work, or change schools.

Sending in the harder work initially could be seen as a dick move (though if he's reading anyway, why not learn I guess),but if after repeated requests they are still not helping your child learn, then they aren't doing their job properly, and frankly at that point, your son's learning is more important than the teachers feelings.

Just to add, I had this problem throughout school as they didn't teach in enough detail to get above a c at GCSE. I did well because I taught myself (literally, got the curriculum, found what they should have been teaching and did it myself every evening). I hated my school years. I hated that I spent most of my days daydreaming, reading, even blatantly sleeping sometimes. Due a ridiculous amount of (school organised) extra curricular stuff, I missed a year of school at one stage. Wouldn't happen now, but it did in the early 90s. I still was falling asleep with boredom when I returned.

I'm not super bright, but the school was so busy teaching those who were struggling, and trying to keep control in the classroom, that anyone average or above just got ignored.

Every child should feel their mind is being stretched at school. Even in the Covid era. They only get one shot at it.

I have a v young year 2 child one of the youngest in her class. Your son sounds gifted and I think it could be a big mistake to think that things wld have been different anywhere else in the past year. We have lived through a year of total chaos and unprecedented challenges for schools.

They will have children who are staggeringly behind targets. Who are massively socially struggling after lockdown. Children who have lost basic skills.

I honestly think it's unfair to hold much against schools in terms of teaching. And belive me I'm not shy to criticise schools I have a lot to say usually but..god give them a break

Worksheets are often crap. The cirrcoulum can be crap. But the past year has not been a time for children to be stretched and challenged... Come on op the school are trying to just help the kids feel normal again and balance the hugely differing needs.

BTW my June born year 2 is not beyond 5 and 10 times tables

And of course they aren't moving on.. They are ensuring kida aren't falling behind.

I think it's easy to forget the massive impact that this year has had on most children in many many ways. I'm a school governor too and know some of the challenges our primary is having. OP if your child has just bounced back into normal school last week, that great, but most schools were focusing mainly on getting the kids settled again and interacting with friends

......Your son sounds gifted....

Even if he were (which he’s not, he’s just bright) the school should still provide work to his level of ability.

I get the teachers have to focus on those who are struggling, but what about all the other children? Don’t they matter too?

Had your son not missed being with his normal friends? Not missed doing fun group activities? Is he happy otherwise?

I think you need to email and request a meeting with his teacher. It sounds like there has been no progression even when they were in school. He shouldn’t be reading and helping others, he should be getting extension work. If nothing changes, take it up with the head of year or head.

Had your son not missed being with his normal friends? Not missed doing fun group activities? Is he happy otherwise?

Missed his normal friends? What do you mean? And what do you mean about missing fun group activities?

I don’t meant to be be pedantic, I’m just not sure what point you’re making? Or what you’re asking?

@Jumpers268

I have the same problem at my son's school (he's 6). This week they learnt how to count to 20. He knows his prime numbers to 100. He finds the school work incredibly boring but I just try to challenge him at home. I, personally, have no intention of changing primary school as he's made firm friends and I think he would struggle to do that at a new school and I don't think it's worth the risk.

That's insane, my 2 year old can count to 20!

He says he's bored so I would move him, he's not getting much out of it and isn't looking forward to going in.

School isn't just aboiut formal learning is it? At this age particularly (you might find it useful to think that in other European countries year 2 is the START of formal learning - I dno't think it matters at 7 that your child isn't being 'pushed' - as long as he is happy.

You say he is bored but I do think it's very difficult to measure school against normality over the past year - you seem to have no sense that this has been an incredibly unusual year.

When another poster asked - hasn't he missed friends - I think they presumed he'd been at home recently but you said he was in key worker school. From my experience (my own kids were key worker and in school-) it was childcare not hugely educaitonal.

My son was bored of the worksheets they were supervised by a -TA -b-e-c-ause -the poor teacher had to also remote teach all the other kids.

you can't just say they shld have helped stretch him as normal when it's been an emergency situation.

-A teacher friend of mine said there will be three groups - really really struggling who have forgtten everything they knew - midddle ones doing okay and those who essentially benefited during lockdown with lots of parental attention / and or are bright and just coasted on with their leanring - she said all the groups will suffer - but from a teachers point of view sadly your son is really the least of their concerns - when they have year 2 children who will barely be writing after so much time out of school.

This isn't to say you can't push for him to get more inspiration but just be realistic about what schools are dealing with.

The problem with giving your child the work aimed at older year groups is that he will constantly be bored. He needs to be challenged with the breadth and depth of work given, rather than being given more of the same, or work based on the objectives of an older year group. This website is great for maths -

nrich.maths.org/12632

Well I had asked the teacher if when she’s getting the other children to their 2, 5 and 10 times tables, can’t my son just do his 6, 7, 8 and 9 times table etc but obviously that’s not happening (and I didn’t think that was a huge change to ask for or one or one that would particularly add to their workload).

He was being schooled when he was in as a Key Worker child, they were doing the same work in class as those being home schooled were being set.

@ThornAmongstRoses

Had your son not missed being with his normal friends? Not missed doing fun group activities? Is he happy otherwise?

Missed his normal friends? What do you mean? And what do you mean about missing fun group activities?

I don’t meant to be be pedantic, I’m just not sure what point you’re making? Or what you’re asking?

I ask that as you seem to be saying he's bored but nothing about the positives of being back to normal ish school. Mine were in KW school but all the kids home and not had the same work which was consolidation not lots of new stuff. I think most schools did this as hard to do new and stretching stuff in the circumstances. They didn't like KW school by the end as they wanted to see all their mates and do normal group work etc. Our school use a lot of on line resources so kids can do extra if they want

I ask that, as he / you seems to be very focused on a couple of academic aspects but school is so much more than that. Is he doing extra to stretch him other ways? Instrument? Cooking? Practical skills? Sports?

My ds was 8 when we moved and he started a new primary school, it was completely fine.

Tell your husband to get a job at a private boys school and send him.with the discount he would get

The problem is the curriculum for Year 2 is the 2, 5 and 10 anything else is going into the Year 3 and KS2 curriculum.

I think what I and others have asked is is HE happy at the school and you seem to suggest that he is - bored sometimes but that is I think as much of a lockdown learning issue with being in school as a keyworker (a lot of keyworker children struggled with that and how they were taught) and now the teacher is catching up and recognising where he is to the Year 2 curriculum.

As a PP said lockdown was an incredibly difficult time to teach how do you make sure that children learn under those circumstances.

Of course all children matter but these are such unusual circumstances and some children have fallen massively behind.

Are you aware for example of how the other school you liked handled lockdown - you seem to think of it as a solution where I think you could end up with the sa,e