Would you tell your kids they’re no good at something?

[Opal93]

I have always resented that my parents were very discouraging and told me I was “crap” at everything. As a result I have achieved very little as I lack confidence in every single area and was always scared to try new things. I always wanted to be different with my own kids, but I have met more and more people whose parents have pushed their kids into being deluded about how talented they are. I have a friend who’s mum pushed singing and made her believe she is a wonderful singer and she’s just not. And she got very depressed for a while when she was auditioning for things and being told she wasn’t good enough. I guess it’s all about finding a balance. How would you tell your dc they aren’t good at something, without hurting them?

No need to tell a child that they are not good at something. They will learn that for themselves. So long they enjoy the activity, does it really matter if they are good or not.

And hard work really does pay off, real improvement does come from practice and hard work. Won’t necessarily result in professional level standard, but will always make a noticeable improvement.

It is possible to be supportive without false praise. As many poster said the key is to praise effort. Though I think it is perfectly fine to praise achievement too, but not in an over the top way.

There is a saying often quoted in the dance world
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.