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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be so scared

35 replies

Mummyofboys88 · 10/03/2021 19:45

On Saturday morning my neighbour 2 doors down knocked to tell me they had seen something very suspicious the night before. He saw 2 men trying to look through my living room windows (curtains were closed so they couldn't see anything) also it looked like they were taking pictures?! This was at 12.40am. Then they kept driving past filming the house and possibly other houses. They reported the information to the police who logged it. Then that night my neighbour was about to go out somewhere in his car and he noticed 3 cars parked up along different parts of the road with people sitting inside. He said he could tell they were empty due to something about the lights? Also a motorbike. Seemed like they were watching my house/lots of houses and trying to work out who is home at what time or what time people are going to bed. He then saw 1 man get out and walk up to my front doors. This was at 10pm so me and my husband were up watching TV. Maybe he was checking out what front door etc we had?? Sunday night my neighbour knocks again saying they have been checking their ring doorbell footage and noticed a few random people at different times of day, pretending they are stroking a cat while checking out where any security cameras are. My first thought was that maybe on the Friday night/Saturday morning when they were at my front window, was that they may have thought the house was empty as we have a drive but no car. Now I am terrified, I haven't been able to sleep more than about 3 hours a night since I have found this out. We had a ring door bell put in yesterday and alarms on my doors. The front windows that open are tiny, but they could find a way in I'm sure! I called the police myself and they have logged everything and I saw police driving up and down a few times. I feel sick all the time and feel so unsafe in my own home. My neighbour seems to think they are a gang and professional! My dad thinks my neighbour has watched too many films but I'm not so sure.

OP posts:
CoRhona · 10/03/2021 19:47

Get yourself a video doorbell. That way you'll know if your neighbour watches too many spy movies or is actually a fab neighbour.

MondeoFan · 10/03/2021 19:49

Op just said she has a ring doorbell now

Mummyofboys88 · 10/03/2021 20:07

Yes I have a ring doorbell since yesterday. You can't see my front windows from it though and I can't afford cctv at the moment. Or a professional to install it.

OP posts:
CrappingMyself · 10/03/2021 20:13

How well do you know your neighbour? Do they seem reliable/trustworthy?

Have you spoken to any other neighbours, and if so, what have they said?

MondeoFan · 10/03/2021 20:18

Do you feel as if it's just facts with the neighbour or he's panicking you unnecessarily? I do think though if you don't have a car on the drive they probably think no one is home. Do you have a dog?

Aquamarine1029 · 10/03/2021 20:19

I would install a very visible cctv camera and motion activated lights.

amylou8 · 10/03/2021 20:20

I'm inclined to agree with your dad, depending on how well you know your neighbour of course......potential mental health issues, dementia etc....?? That said you definitely shouldn't ignore this, which you're clearly not. You can get cheap IP cameras on Amazon for about £30, we have the Neos which are good. You view them through an app on your phone. Could be worth getting for peace of mind.

flappityflippers1 · 10/03/2021 20:23

Has your neighbour also been telling others?

You can get security cameras on eBay for £20, they won’t be the best but a good deterrent and better than nothing?

I’d be tempted to put a big sign in my window saying “fuck off you dodgy robbing twats, we’re onto you!!”

CompleteBarstool · 10/03/2021 20:23

How well do you know the neighbour (presuming they're the only one that has seen any of this suspicious activity)?

Could they be a bit of a drama llama?

UrsulaBee · 10/03/2021 20:26

Have any of your neighbours noticed anything?

RandomUser18282 · 10/03/2021 20:26

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

CompleteBarstool · 10/03/2021 20:27

I also meant to ask.... can you think of any reason why these dodgy characters might be interested in your house (if indeed they are)?

eg. do you have a pedigree dog? Have you bought anything expensive recently? Do any of you have hobbies that require expensive equipment?

Dragongirl10 · 10/03/2021 20:30

Op assuming your neighbour is genuine, can you or DH put retractable security grilles on your ground floor windows? Often to be found on ebay.
Get a dog barking recording and a few cheap sensor security lights that go on automatically.They won't want to burgle a house lit up like a beacon.
Top and bottom door bolts are cheap and effective too.

TaraR2020 · 10/03/2021 20:32

I would also install a monitored alarm, otherwise you're doing the right things I think

SchrodingersImmigrant · 10/03/2021 20:33

I am sorry but none of you I guess owns something worth 3 cars and a motorbike x days long stake outs....

I agree with others about the neighbour.

Blublubblubbing · 10/03/2021 20:40

A word of caution about wireless ring doorbells and cctv. If they use the WiFi to save the footage like these devices do they can and are easily jammed by professionals. You are always better to get wired cctv or a wired ring doorbell. My car has been broken into twice now and doorbell was blocked from picking up any footage.

www.smarthomepoint.com/jamming-ring-doorbell/

Speakuptomakeyourselfheard · 10/03/2021 20:41

I'm tempted to think that the neighbour is a bit of a drama llama, but just in case, could you invite one of your neighbours who has more than one care to park on your driveway, at least if there is any truth in the story, they might find a car there off putting.

Mamamia456 · 10/03/2021 20:47

Get motion sensor security lights fitted to the front and rear of your property.

WhiskyIrnBru · 10/03/2021 20:49

Buy a Clever dog camera and position it in your windows. They are about £20 from Amazon and you get an app that connects to your phone. Can set up alerts or even an alarm to go off on your phone when triggered. We use them as baby monitors too.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 10/03/2021 20:52

Did you piss off that neighbour by any chance?

Mummyofboys88 · 10/03/2021 20:55

Thank you so much for all your replies. The neighbour has lived 2 doors down from me for the last 7 years now, not really had any dealings with apart from hello when I see him. He is a lodger in the house. The house he lives in has a few cars (4 adults live there) so maybe he is panicked for himself also. He did say he was so scared and hasn't slept etc. He has been reviewing the camera footage constantly and he did show me footage of the young man pretending he was stroking the cat while checking out where cameras are located. The cars and bikes I saw on some of his phone footage. They have driven past a good few times filming the houses apparently. We don't live in a well off area and there is nothing worth stealing from mine that's for sure. It all seems so strange! If it was just the cars and them filming and parking up randomly (seems like to be away from any cameras) I would be suspicious but not absolutely petrified as I am because they went to my window and doors. At least they would know people are home with no car in the drive now.

OP posts:
RatsolutelyFabulous · 10/03/2021 20:57

It’s good that you’ve got a ring doorbell camera, me and my ex got one for the front and back of our rental after being burgled in the middle of the night (I didn’t hear a thing) I don’t want to further scare you but we had the tiniest window in the bathroom we kept open for the cats to jump in and out of and the people who burgled us, used a child to get through the window to then open the main one in the kitchen that an adult could fit through. Please make sure you keep it closed!

Log all suspicious activity to police and just keep lights on to make sure they know you are home even if you aren’t. Your neighbour could be bullshitting but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Sorry to hear how anxious and nervous this is all making you, are you able to have someone come stay for a while to keep your mind at ease?

DitchedBitch · 10/03/2021 20:58

I'd get a load of security signs front and back of my property/boundary. Regardless whether I have what the signs say. There's loads on Amazon.
Get a chain on your door too.
Have you noticed anyone or strange cars in the street since your neighbour has told you this.
Is your neighbour OK or a bit ....weird?? Did you have much to do with your neighbour before this?

SongSilkTrainspot · 10/03/2021 20:58

Do you have a dog? So many dog thefts at the moment and reports of tagging homes with a dog.

FenceSplinters · 10/03/2021 21:01

I think this is an overactive imagination. Surely potential burglars would be a bit more subtle.

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