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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is there anyone on here who can give some advice re council housing?

30 replies

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 12:40

With housing advice please who I can PM?
I really could do with some help in regards to getting the council to help me more, in relation to moving to a bigger property due to one of my disabled children.

I know Aibu isn't the place for this but I'm absolutely desperate now, and wondering if there's anything I've missed on who to ask for help.
Thanks.

OP posts:
warmandtoasty2day · 06/03/2021 13:07

bumping for you

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 06/03/2021 13:17

You might want to get HQ to change your title so it mentions council housing.

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:19

@ArchbishopOfBanterbury Good idea thank you. I was scared I was running out of room.

OP posts:
stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:19

@MNHQ could you change title to include council housing please. Thank you

OP posts:
warmandtoasty2day · 06/03/2021 13:22

[quote stressbandit]@MNHQ could you change title to include council housing please. Thank you [/quote]
i reported this for you so hoping mnhq will get back to you soon, hope it works out soon for you Flowers

barbrahunter · 06/03/2021 13:23

When I had problems of this nature years ago, I found Shelter had the best advice, have you looked at their website?

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 06/03/2021 13:24

Are you already in touch with a local Advocacy service?

TwoBlueFish · 06/03/2021 13:28

Have you asked for an occupational therapist to asses? Do you have a social worker? If not you can phone the children’s disability team at your local council and ask for them to asses your sons and your needs (as a carer). They can the write reports to back up your claim.

Marzipanfruit · 06/03/2021 13:29

Don't know where in the country you are, but I know from experience that Headteachers can write supporting letters to Councils about housing, which would be taken into consideration along with any other info. Hope things get better for you.

NotFabulousDarling · 06/03/2021 13:30

If you've exhausted all other avenues, can you get your local MP involved? They usually love being seen to help in these sorts of cases. Also local press.

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:49

Thank you to all who's commented so what it is, we currently live on the top floor of a tower block I have three kids.

When I first accepted this flat I loved it I still do, but now my daughter's needs have become apparent it's no longer suitable.

She has a neurological condition which this flat makes it impossible to live in anymore.

We are bidding for a 3 bed but the band I'm in there is 300 people ahead of me.

I've had supporting letters from my housing manager,My Gp discussing my mental health and how the flat isn't suitable for her anymore and the local counsellor and The MP.

The school wrote a huge letter on how it was unsafe as she has no awareness of safety of herself or others and danger.
I can't go into it to much as there are things that have happened that a few people are aware of and would be able to identify me from this.

The letter the school wrote included an occasion on where my DD quite possibly could have injured someone severely due to finding an awful object she was able to get from a kitchen! At school!

I'm tired now so tired of fighting the council.

They have all of this information and letters my DD is fully supported by a 1-1 at school and I do it at home to protect her and my sons.

They're is no space to divide rooms or have her in with me as my own issue prevents this so they are all in the one room together, she doesn't sleep none of us have slept through in years. She is 6 years old so still very young.

The council refused to award us medical priority to move and I appealed they said nope, I then spoke to someone else from the housing who then got a physiatrist involved who awarded us Band A with medical priority 1,
we was 2nd for a house.

I then recieve a call yesterday telling me it was a mistake and no priority should of been awarded at all, until I can supply more reports or info but I don't have anything else to give other than what I have given.

I do not know what else to do I am absolutely petrified they will take this band a away which the woman said they are looking to do.

My daughter walks along my windowsills and doesn't get down without a fight she wakes in the night still.
it's 235ft up on the air, I have window restrictors on however you can still get a small person out of that gap I have bad anxiety because of the intrusive thoughts I get about her falling from the windows, the council have already said there isn't no more they can add on, I've been in therapy since 2018 for stress and anxiety.

She is in receipt of High rate DLA I receive carers, the only downfall is she isn't officially diagnosed, however the school has treated her and her Gp like she is from day one of reception.

We have been fighting CAMHS to see her since she was 4 she still is waiting to be seen but we are now working with another agency who work alongside Camhs who also confirm they would diagnose the condition and it's severe.

Please if anyone has any knowledge on what else I can do please feel free to message me or anything, I don't want them to take my banding away.
I need this bedroom for my daughter sooner rather than later.

Sorry this is so long.

I feel like I've wrote maybe too much and maybe identified myself now.

OP posts:
stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:49

Really apologise it's so long winded I've tried to include everything possible without it being so obvious to those who would recognise who I am.

OP posts:
Gobbledene · 06/03/2021 13:51

Unfortunately it does depend where you are and what authority you come under to an extent. Here, the supporting letters and statements would have been sufficient to bump you up the list, but sadly that doesn't seem to be the case where you are. Does your child have a worker/medical professional who could provide something, outside of school? It's a sad fact that the GP writing about you struggling isn't likely to help as much as something related directly to your child.

Gobbledene · 06/03/2021 13:53

Do you have a children's centre nearby OP? Here they are a hub for useful info, contacts and advice, but a lot of places have had them closed.

Givemeabreak88 · 06/03/2021 13:55

Tbh I don’t think what you said means you can’t live in a flat? Just sounds like she needs more supervision and window locks

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:57

I can try them but I'm not sure I have no social worker my daughter is under a great team who are working alongside Camhs atm so I could speak to them, I just feel like banging my head off a wall. She has no where at all to go and calm down and I'm so tired of the threats to jump out the window. I could cry honestly I have a great community here and support the flat was fine until this became clear and obviously it's no ones fault, but Christ it's hard work now.

OP posts:
stressbandit · 06/03/2021 13:59

She attacks my sons in the night and sits on the windowsills in her bedroom, she will look for keys to unlock windows and the windows cannot be fitted with more locks, she will also try to break the actual window as she wants to feel the air.

I also have a special door in my flat that you just push to get out and it brings you to another level of the tower block. I don't feel she is safe in a bedroom with my sons as she spends her hole time hurting other people, she does half days in school because of it and is banned from toilets at her school. Sorry it's so much to it.

OP posts:
Youmakemyheartgogiddyup · 06/03/2021 14:04

I can see the stress you're under and feel for you.
You would need to demonstrate why your daughter medically needs her own room, the night waking wouldn't change with her in her own room.
As for the height danger, can you ask for different restrictors that don't open so much or get some fitted yourself?
I think the problem is that there is only so many houses available and demand outweighs supply so it is a case of waiting.

I would definitely complain about the band thing though, how awful for them to have you believe you're getting the band then take it away.

Youmakemyheartgogiddyup · 06/03/2021 14:04

Sorry X posted with you

TheGriffle · 06/03/2021 14:09

I work in council housing for my area and the info you have given here and the supporting letters would have increased your banding where we are. Are you in London or a similarly high demand area? Is it only a 2 bed flat as well? We would award priority for overcrowding as well.

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 14:11

@TheGriffle Hi I am in Greater London we are down as overcrowded thats how we got into the Band C B is for homeless and we did get into A but they are now threatening to take this away Sad. Also it's a 2bed flat.

OP posts:
stressbandit · 06/03/2021 14:12

I think what has broke me the most is that all this fighting has just got us no where. I didn't realise they could take a band back.

OP posts:
Brunt0n · 06/03/2021 14:14

The problem is that even if you were given a ground floor flat, she can’t be walking on windowsills and falling / climbing out of windows, so they’ll all need to be locked at all times anyway?

stressbandit · 06/03/2021 14:17

@Brunt0n I get that but it would be a lot easier to cope with mentally because at the moment the thought of it being so high is making my mental health rough.
I've had CBT therapy 3 times now to try and cope with the thoughts.
In a ground floor place the height wouldn't be a problem at all as yes the windows would be locked but there shouldn't be a worry god forbid about a fall from a huge height.

OP posts:
Brunt0n · 06/03/2021 14:22

[quote stressbandit]@Brunt0n I get that but it would be a lot easier to cope with mentally because at the moment the thought of it being so high is making my mental health rough.
I've had CBT therapy 3 times now to try and cope with the thoughts.
In a ground floor place the height wouldn't be a problem at all as yes the windows would be locked but there shouldn't be a worry god forbid about a fall from a huge height. [/quote]
Yes but if the windows are locked she won’t fall out.

I don’t think you’ll get anywhere with that reason, just keep your windows locked the same as we all have to with kids.

The overcrowding thing maybe. Could you sleep in the living room and give the kids separate rooms? Get a really comfy sofa bed?