That all I enjoy doing is staying in the house and watching tv?

[flaminhotcheetos]

I've always been this way, I would definitely call myself lazy however my house is clean and tidy and I am very motivated when it comes to my job. I can push myself to do things even if I don't want to do them, if I know it will benefit me in the long run.

However, all I want to do is sit and scroll my phone/watch tv/read a book. My ideal day is when I know I have no obligations and can just sit and scroll/watch tv/read.

I have a 7 year old dd and share custody with her dad, when I have her I obviously make the effort to go to the park, go walks, bake, play games or whatever, but I always look forward to just laying on the sofa watching tv, scrolling or reading. It's where I feel content and relaxed and sometimes I have cancelled plans with people to do just that.

I'm not depressed, I still find joy in everyday life, I just genuinely like being alone doing these things. I honestly could do it everyday for the rest of my life (excluding days I have my dd) and not get bored.

I always feel a pang of guilt because I think life is going quickly and I know a lot of people would judge me for wanting to spend my time like this but I just do.

I enjoy it more than hanging out with friends, or going a walk, or going for lunch or exercising. I feel like I should be doing more because society says I should be doing more. I feel that whenever I'm not working and not got my daughter and someone asks me what I'm doing the answering is constantly, 'just chilling' or 'just relaxing' and I feel judged by certain friends as they are just go go go.

AIBU to think I'm abnormal in some way that this is how I have spent the last ten years and don't see it changing anytime
Soon?

I'm the same!

I'm not sure how much is finding 'activities' overwhelming (I have ADHD and find too much stimulus is a surefire way to either sheer exhaustion or anxiety) but I am genuinely happy when I've got a whole day to just noodle about doing very little. My DH is the same thankfully.

We do do other things - we travel when we can afford to, we occasionally do as escape room (we're v good at them now) or go up a mountain or to an art gallery or whatever. But we're happiest when we're at home just reading next to each other or mindlessly scrolling.

It's very genuinely one of the reasons we don't want kids.

One of the most profound turning points in my life was when I learned that I was extremely introverted, and what being an introvert actually meant.

It's about where you draw your energy from and how you replenish it.

I have great social skills and lots of social confidence. However, whatever energy I expend needs to be recharged, and I can only do that alone. Silent, slow quiet time gives me back my energy.

In short, extroverts gain their energy from being around other people, introverts gain energy from solitude. Imho, obv.

Learn faster than I did: it took me three decades to realise that I wasn't a weirdo, just an introvert who needed time alone to be my best self.

YANBU. People can be quite judgmental about how others choose to spend their time, particularly if one is not interested in travel or large gatherings of people (concerts, festivals, theatre).

Not everyone lives for those things, and that's okay. A life lived trekking all over the planet is not always more satisfying or worthwhile than one spent in one small corner of the world. Many people love travel and crowds, but there are other, equally valid ways of living. If you're happiest where you are, why should you feel pressured into venturing forth, simply because people think you "should"?

Yes I'm definitely an introvert with most of my friends being extroverts who struggle to understand my need for solitude. I'm glad I'm not the only one!

You are not alone OP.
I'm the same, never bored because I'm happy doing nothing.
Our DC have left home but DH is always active, tires me out just watching him.
The best week of 2020 for me was when he had to go away for work and I could just laze about without feeling judged.
If it was good enough for Churchill, it's good enough for me

Winston Churchill, sir, to what do you attribute your success in life? ' and he said without hesitating: 'Economy of effort. Never stand up when you can sit down, and never sit down when you can lie down.

This thread is very interesting

I think people regret not doing what makes them happy

Societal pressure to be out doing things is actually rooted in the economy. If everyone stayed at home watching tv the economy would suffer massively (as we’ve seen!). So your average person has to a degree been brought up with the idea that you have to be out doing things to be “living” as you can see on here with all the responses of “make sure your DC are doing stuff”. Yes, so they can become adults who continue to go out and spend!

Yes of course we need this otherwise all leisure businesses would go bust and no one could do anything, but I dislike the pressure that comes with that. We should still have free will to do what makes us happy, without being made to feel somewhat “less” than others.

My DC didn’t do all the clubs and excursions that people seem to deem necessary as I couldn’t afford it. But they have still grown into adults who are interested in the world around them. They have both traveled and worked in other countries. They have friends and go out and do things. But equally none of us “needs” to be out doing something. I feel more sorry for the people who can’t bear to spend one day indoors. I know people like that who are desperate to just do anything to get out of the house. I’m happy to go out and do things but I feel no need to do something just for the sake of it. I’m just as happy at home with a book.

I'm the same. I make sure every day I have "relaxation" time. If I don't, I struggle mentally, I feel very mentally exhausted and drained if I am around people all the time. I have struggled a lot with having husband wfh and homeschooling the kids because I'm never alone. Once the kids go back I will be spending a lot of time relaxing and on self care.
I do love to go out and about on days out with the family etc but not out on walks and stuff like that. I'm a home body and so is my husband. We spend alot of time outside in the garden enjoying the sunshine.
My parents go out somewhere every day, including during the lockdowns, mainly to different town centres walking round endless shops. I think this is silly and a waste of time, but they obviously enjoy it.

My biggest problem is that when I'm relaxing I eat junk at the same time so now I'm very overweight

YANBU

I'm not sure why having parties or going out socialising is inherently getting "more" out of life than reading a good book. Depending on the book and the company in question, the book may well be more capable of broadening horizons and inspiring greater thought than the socialising.

I get out a lot - horses, sports, historical interests - but as a general rule, I do not feel I'm missing out by not socialising as much as others. Most people limit their activities in some direction. Some people who are very active socially would be terrified to do the things I do with my horses. Others travel to more adventurous places but have more mundane work. Nobody can experience everything in life, however hard you try.

How dull.

Up to you though. There's a whole big world out there with so many things to experience and discover. Who looks back on their life and wishes they'd watched more telly?/

@RaspberryCoulis but if that's what I enjoy why not? It certainly doesn't feel dull to me, it's something I really look forward to and enjoy.

You say I won't look back in life and wish I'd watched more tele, but if that's what I enjoy doing why would I? May I look back on life I wish I'd read more books? Should I look back on life and wished I'd climbed more mountains instead even though I would get no enjoyment out of doing so? Should I look back on life and wished I'd travelled more even though I have no interest in doing that? Should I force myself to do those things just because that's what the majority of people enjoy doing? I'm struggling to see your point.

There is no "should", OP. There is nothing morally superior about being busier or having more varied experiences.

Some people want to experience as much as they can in the time that they have. Others are content to enjoy what they have. Neither is better, it's just different.

The majority of people spend most evenings watching telly, and are perfectly happy doing so.

As a pp sagely noted, a lot of the pressure to be Doing Stuff comes from the capitalist system's need for us to be economically active (i.e. spending money).

I used to bow to a lot of that pressure in my teens and early twenties, believing there must be a reason we're supposed to love festivals, clubbing, gigs and so on, but I rarely really enjoyed myself. I would pretend I was having a great time, because everyone else seemed to be and I didn't want to be a drag. It was uncomfortable and I would long for it all to be over.

Now I'm nearly forty, carrying on with that pretence instead of doing the things I actually enjoy is what would feel like a waste.

I love socialising, but an evening at home with friends - some cheese and wine and good conversation - is my idea of a top night.

Enjoy your sofa time and don't buy the hype.

I’m similar. I rarely watch tv, but I’m happiest and most chilled just reading in my own garden or pottering around house and garden.

It doesn’t mean I don’t do other stuff. Usually we do lots, travel lots, see lots of people and places. But when I have finished, and go home with a book and quiet, it’s when I can finally relax.

Yanbu
I’m looking forward to napping on the sofa on my day off once dd is back in school. Napping on the sofa is my favourite thing to do