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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you to please tell me it gets better

118 replies

PleaseLetMeSleeeeep · 25/02/2021 02:15

My son (3 weeks) is suffering really badly with colic. His trapped wind is awful and he just can't sleep at all. This is the 3rd night in a row I'll have sat up in the living room rocking him until 5/6am (he's bad every night but the past 3 have been ridiculous).

I don't know how to do this, I am so unbelievably tired.

I took him to the GP today to check nothing else was wrong but just got a sympathetic 'its common' and sent on my way.

He looks like he's in so much pain, will only settle on me sat upright. I am terrified of falling asleep with him on me I'm so tired.

Every time I think he's finally dropped off he wakes again the minute he's lay down in his basket.

OP posts:
Original poster
PleaseLetMeSleeeeep · 25/02/2021 15:08

Just trying our first bottle of comfort milk now 🤞🤞🤞🤞

OP posts:
Freezeboy · 25/02/2021 15:22

Gripe water might be worth a shot and if you still struggle on the comfort milk then colief might be an option to try.

I reduced gas by trying pace feeding.

Sending sympathy it’s very much trial and error for each baby.

You aren’t a bad mum for putting them down for 10 mins to go else where for a cry / lay down. I have also been there. The phrase you can’t pour from an empty cup comes to mind. Xx

tobedtoMNandfart · 25/02/2021 15:30

I have 3 DC. Infacol infacol infacol.
The recommended number of drops at EVERY feed.
It turns little 'unburpable' bubbles into big bubbles.
Hang on in there it will get easier. 💐

CharlieB93 · 25/02/2021 15:35

Comfort milk and tiger hold to wind them (gets the wind out of both ends) was a game changer for us. I know how you feel it’s horrendous but it does pass in time.

Welikebeingcosy · 25/02/2021 15:47

I think you can get colic drops. My baby was like this and lots of walking outdoors at night really helped to settle her.

Mummysgonetobed · 25/02/2021 15:55

You have my sympathies OP, my first two were both hideously colicky and it was hell on earth. But it does get better, around 12 weeks for us both times. I remember going to a pharmacy and begging for help and the very honest pharmacist said that infacol may help but likelihood was I just needed to accept it and plod on through.
That changed my thinking, I could try but I wouldn’t cure it so had to accept how it was. Once I lowered my expectations it was much easier to deal with.
I could set my clock by my second DS, 10pm every night until about 3.30am we’d be pacing the living room with him crying. It was awful.
But it won’t last forever, I promise!

SarahFrances89 · 25/02/2021 16:38

What I struggle with is knowing what’s a ‘normal’ amount of crying - my ds is 8 weeks and doesn’t settle from about 6/7 of an evening to midnight, sometimes up to 1 or 2. He cries, eats, cries a bit, naps for 20/30 mins etc until he goes down around midnight for a good few hours waking up each 2-4 hours to feed until about 9 or 10. I thought it was just usual that babies were unsettled particularly in the evenings and cried but now I’m worried I’ve been leaving him suffering (obviously not actually leaving him but not dealing with it IYSWIM). He went through a time of arching his back and crying mid feed but that stopped after a week or two. Now he’s crying a lot more than usual and has some diarrhoea but HV and GP never bothered when I mention anything as he’s a big baby and growing well (91st percentile) I’m waiting for another call back from the GP but how do you know when crying is a normal young baby or more than that?! :( good luck OP, and glad you got some sleep this morning. Mine sleeps well in the morning so that’s when I catch up if I need to! My NCT leader also said colic is long bouts of unexplained crying without specific medical diagnostics or treatment Confused

chaosrabbitland · 25/02/2021 16:43

it does get better op , my dd had terrible colic , as soon as 6 pm hit the crying would start which soon escalated to screaming at points , i would manage to get her settled and down in the cot and bang the crying would start , for a fair few nights i remember sitting up on the settee with her constantly stroking and rubbing her back with my hand on her tummy as this seemed to soothe and help her , but the minute i stopped she started back up again , i struggled to keep my eyes open to focus on csi which id put on at low volume to keep me awake ! lol . but it just gradualy gets better , it really does ,

Ispini · 25/02/2021 16:50

My DD2 never stopped screaming (8 hrs a day) until a friend in the US suggested lactose free formula. It was very new this side of the world at the time and cost a bomb but from the day she started it she was a different baby and we finally got some peace. Might be worth a try. My heart goes out to you, it’s a very difficult phase to go through. Try to get breaks if you can. Wishing you all the best. 💐

Stellaris22 · 25/02/2021 18:21

I remember this with my DD who suffered terribly with colic so you have my sympathies.

I hope the comfort milk helps as it really did with us, also the Dr Brown bottles and colief.

pinklillie · 25/02/2021 20:03

@PleaseLetMeSleeeeep

I see Dr brown bottles recommend on here a few times. It's just going to be such a big expense as I have the mam bottles that you take apart and sterilise within themselves in the microwave so I'd need to get a steriliser on top of the bottles if I changed to Dr browns.

But if it helps it's worth it. I think I'll get one and give it a try before I commit to buying the lot.

Poor thing, you can hear the bubbles in his tummy sometimes Sad

We have a Milton bucket and the Dr Brown bottles come with a little brush for the middle part to clean it too. How have you got on with the comfort milk?
EKGEMS · 25/02/2021 20:04

My kid had terrible colic until I switched from cow based formula to soy based-he was on Rx for reflux as well. He was much better after the switch. It was hell on earth before then

Lara53 · 25/02/2021 20:56

It does get better. What got me through was having ds in a sling so I could get on with stuff I needed to do. We also slept with him between us in bed propped up in a bouncy chair - safely strapped in- kept him upright enough for a few mins here and there to allow us to rest!

Ladesiderata · 25/02/2021 20:59

I remember my 12 weeks of my second baby having colic as the longest and darkest of my life. But mark the days off on a calendar, they will end. You will get through this. X

SpringisSpinning · 25/02/2021 21:00

Op do you have a Co sleeper cot, invaluable for times like this.. They settle so much easier when right next to you and you can fully relax knowing they are totally safe in their space.

Chimeraforce · 25/02/2021 21:03

My daughter had this it was awful.
I switched to Dr browns bottles. Not cheap but they saved us. No more trapped wind. Wonderful.
I felt things in general improved at age 4 to 5. But I did have PND.

Babyroobs · 25/02/2021 21:05

We saw a cranial Osteopath for my ds. After that session was the first time he slept solidly for six or seven hours. We only went a couple of times as it was so expensive ( not in the Uk ), but I wish we could have carried on .

TomRipley · 25/02/2021 21:19

Have you looked at those Wind ease sticks that you can pop up their bum?

I must admit I didn't try them but the reviews looked really good. If I had constant screaming I would have definitely bought them,

Letting your baby float in a warm bath with you supporting their head is helpful followed by a tummy massage and leg cycle. There are videos on YouTube that can show you what order to do things for best results.

Merryoldgoat · 25/02/2021 21:42

My DS had this. It went on for ages. I was dismissed over and over. We tried lactose free milk at 2 - cured overnight. Literally. We felt hideous.

We have used lactase and lactose free dairy products for the last year and it’s transforming.

Try colief drops which are essentially lactase for babies. It won’t hurt. Comfort milk caused other issues for us and didn’t solve his wind.

You could hear the bubbles in his tummy.

TolkiensFallow · 26/02/2021 01:32

It will get better. I had this and it feels like it will last forever but it won’t I promise. The first six weeks are generally the hardest. Hang in there xx

Original poster
PleaseLetMeSleeeeep · 26/02/2021 05:40

Well sorry to say that so far the comfort milk has made sweet FA difference as here we are seeing in another 6am 😭

I feel like a terrible mother but I let him sleep in his car seat for half an hour at about 3 just so I could close my eyes. I set am alarm for 30 mins. I know you're not supposed to but it's so frustrating as he goes to sleep within seconds in there Sad

I will say one thing though, I'm not convinced that it's been about wind tonight. He's been awake and crying but he doesn't look in pain like he did before.

I've desperately spent a load last night online shopping for all sorts 🤦‍♀️

OP posts:
Orchidflower1 · 26/02/2021 05:49

@PleaseLetMeSleeeeep
As a pp said colief drops really helped. You used to be able to get them on prescription but can buy from boots - £10 ish pounds but worth it.

Feed sitting up in a bouncer/ holding facing you.

Yy to tiger in the tree hold after. And a chest carrier - facing you first then turned face forward as soon as old enough.

It does pass.

Orchidflower1 · 26/02/2021 05:52

Also if you have only just given one day if a different milk it will take longer to completely clear the system.

Have you tried smaller but more regular feeds through the day? That helped my dd but it is awful. Do you have a partner to switch with. It is bloody draining !

Liverbird77 · 26/02/2021 07:22

Just to add m, you absolutely need help at night.
Your partner may well need to be up for work etc but they still need to help. You need four hours of continuous sleep as a bare minimum. If not, you're putting yourself and your child at risk.

peachypetite · 26/02/2021 07:26

My baby suffered dreadfully. Would never bring her wind up. Switched to mam bottles, tiger in the tree hold calmed her down, as did a dummy to prevent her taking in even more air and infacol. You do need to give things a chance to work though, not expect miracles after the first time of a new milk etc. She is three months now and grew out of it and now easily burps and brings it up!