To be slightly irritated at this?

[Pipperleen]

DH and I completely disagree - see what you think.

I feel like I am constantly getting annoyed by DH’s carelessness. He argues that I have no right to be as he doesn’t do these things on purpose.
Some examples include dropping his phone on the laminate floor in our bedroom and waking up our 4 month old, singing at the top of his voice around the house whilst she’s trying to nap, generally clattering about and dropping stuff whilst we are going to bed so she wakes up.
Breaking glasses - we got some heavy bottomed champagne glasses for our wedding, none are left. Things like standing them upside down and then knocking them over, breaking them when trying to get other things in that cupboard. Not a big deal but just a bit annoying! Same goes with various cups, bowls and plates.
Yesterday he broke the shower as he was trying to move the head with such force and snapped it. Again, it wasn’t on purpose so I can’t be cross he says.

I feel like I’m always saying ‘just be a bit more careful next time’ like I’m his mother or something. In my head I’m trying to tell myself to chill out but at the same time I think ‘why can’t we have nice things?’.

What do you reckon?
YABU chill out, it’s an accident
YANBU you have the right to be a bit peeved at times!

I'm dyspraxic and clumsy is only a part of it. On the other hand, I genuinely can't help the breakages, which extend as far as my bones, regularly. It's probably worth getting him tested but whether the result is dyspraxia or not, he's not likely to change dramatically as few people do by adulthood.

It might make more sense to put systems in place to mitigate the damage. In our case we only buy glasses, plates etc. from Ikea as they can be cheaply and easily replaced - our set of six glasses are like Trigger's broom in that we have the same set of six but I think we've bought about 18 of them by now!

When renovating our house (an ongoing process) my husband looks carefully at things like access, steps, door handles etc. and removes or chooses them in order to accommodate the likelihood of me injuring myself on them. It may sound dramatic but it's how we have to live, and my husband is an observer so he's seen how I behave and worked out which bits I can take more responsibility for and which I can't. In your case things like a rug on the bedroom floor might help. In terms of waking the baby maybe you can expect him to do it and catch it before it happens? I realise this all sounds very annoying but if there's a chance he really can't help himself then taking these steps will be for your own benefit rather than his.

If you really think he's just a thoughtless idiot then you have to have an entirely different conversation with yourself.

I dont have a favourite mug, any cup will do

and yet other people do for a variety of reasons and wouldn't be unreasonable to expect that a clumsy oaf, who knows they're a clumsy oaf (or whatever) doesn't apologise for breaking that mug.

He sounds thoughtless and clumsy. And he can’t police your emotions - if it pisses you off it pisses you off - you’re not his mother you’re his partner and the mother of his child. You can acknowledge an accident and still be annoyed!

I don't want my family to live in a house of fear

so you’d rather live in a house where there’s no obligation to apologise or acknowledge another person is upset/annoyed that you’ve broken something? Especially when it’s through carelessness? I’d be interested to know this poster’s thoughts on if an iPad was broken, or the tv, or name any other expensive item that belongs to you. Lucky you to have endless amounts of money to replace broken items and the capacity to not be arsed at all what a terrible lesson you’re teaching your children.

@dimidDavilby sorry but I nearly choked on my hot drink reading your first comment but you are right. Your second comment is also spot on - 'whoever wakes the baby settles the baby'.