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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not understand the conspiracy

57 replies

MeadowViews · 13/02/2021 07:46

My DM has been offered the Covid vaccine but has refused it. She says it's all part of a conspiracy.

She has been going on and on about conspiracy theories and how this is all a set up for 'them' to control 'us all'. Her sources are "a Doctor/what she read on the internet."

She also firmly believes in astrology, psychics, and spiritual healing.

Do I support her in her own personal choice not to get the vaccine (she said "I'm not having it, I know what's really in it") based on random internet findings, or tell her I think she has too much time on her hands?

After nearly a year of her theories my patience is wearing thin.

OP posts:
AStudyinPink · 13/02/2021 07:48

Can’t you do both? “Mum, that sounds mental, but it’s up to you.”

BonnieDundee · 13/02/2021 07:50

Her choice. Do you need to say anything at all?

TidyDancer · 13/02/2021 07:55

Do you think she'd listen to you? I'd be tempted to wade in if so. She's obviously wrong in what she's asserting, but ultimately it's her choice whether to have the vaccine or not.

Fatladyslim · 13/02/2021 07:58

Just ignore it. I found out someone at work was an anti vaxxer the other day. He said he was advising his elderly mother not to have the vaccine because he had read 'the science' and knew the vaccine would do more harm than good.

In the next breath he told me he was worried about returning to the office because of covid and not wanting to bring it home to his mum.

There's no hope for these people, just ignore and let them crack on.

1starwars2 · 13/02/2021 08:01

I agree. You need to tell that you think she's wrong, that's how conspiracy theories breed.
However it is also her choice. My elderly relative has declined the vaccine because she thinks she has a good immune system....
Luckily she is good at social distancing and is at low risk of catching it.
Ultimately its her decision.

EileenGC · 13/02/2021 08:04

I wouldn’t try reasoning with her mum more than once. It sounds like she isn’t likely to change her mind. My only argument would be ‘so which scientific sources have you been reading, could you please send me a link to these research papers as I’m also very interested in educating myself on this subject’.

Failing that, I find that a lot of anti-vaxxers will shut up and have it when they realise all the things they might be left out of. I know many of these won’t be true for a few years (excluded from travel or mass events), but is your mum fond of any of those? Worth a try to persuade her. That’s how I won over my dad...

Original poster
MeadowViews · 13/02/2021 08:13

I did suggest that we may all need proof of a vaccine to travel in the future but she said she's done enough travelling anyway.

There is absolutely no way of helping her out of the rabbit hole she's 'researched' herself into, but now she's influencing others (she proudly told me her neighbour was booked for their vaccine but she talked her out of it) it makes my heart sink.

OP posts:
overnightangel · 13/02/2021 08:14

@Fatladyslim

Just ignore it. I found out someone at work was an anti vaxxer the other day. He said he was advising his elderly mother not to have the vaccine because he had read 'the science' and knew the vaccine would do more harm than good.

In the next breath he told me he was worried about returning to the office because of covid and not wanting to bring it home to his mum.

There's no hope for these people, just ignore and let them crack on.

All of this ☝🏻
Morten · 13/02/2021 08:23

Presumably your mum is an adult so it's entirely her choice whether to have a vaccination or not. I don't see why you feel the need to question whether to "support her choice" or not.

It's also up to your mum to believe in woo like star signs etc if she wants to!

SidSparrow · 13/02/2021 08:24

People are allowed to believe what they want. When we start policing each others opinions and choices then we're in real bother. Repect her decision.

1starwars2 · 13/02/2021 08:26

Terrifying that she is talking other people out of it though. What if her neighbour catches covid and dies? Ask her if she is prepared to be responsible for that?
For herself it's her decision but influencing others is very worrying.

ememem84 · 13/02/2021 08:30

Her body her choice.

Dd was against the vaccine for his own reasons. Dm said to him have it or dont. But don’t complain if things get restricted for those who haven’t had it.

Springersrock · 13/02/2021 08:38

I have a colleague who genuinely believes that the vaccine is a way to control the population and that “they” are using it to reduce the size of the population because of climate change - which he doesn’t believe in either

He thinks the vaccine has some kind of chip in it which the government can use to track and control us and that it is also a way to sterilise us.

When questioned he just rants and raves about “sheeple” and tells us to do our research - his research seems to consist of watching videos on YouTube.

We all just ignore him now. He’s not going to suddenly change his mind, and he wouldn’t admit to it if he did.

He seems to think he is of some sort of special superior intellect while the rest of us just stupid. He’d argue the sky was green if someone said it was blue and bombard you with all sorts of research (YouTube links) to counter your argument (rather than just look outside and use his own eyes).

He gets firmly ignored, you just can’t reason with him and discussing it with him just gives him the attention he craves

Createsuser · 13/02/2021 08:42

I saw this video- it goes something along the lines of “The vaccine alters your DNA and knows when you are having sex”GrinGrin. That’s some vaccine!

Original poster
MeadowViews · 13/02/2021 08:45

@1starwars2

Terrifying that she is talking other people out of it though. What if her neighbour catches covid and dies? Ask her if she is prepared to be responsible for that? For herself it's her decision but influencing others is very worrying.
Absolutely. Sad
OP posts:
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 13/02/2021 08:49

How can you ‘respect’ a bonkers decision?
You can just regret it and accept that there’s nothing you can do with people who’ve been stuffing their brains with rubbish off the internet.

Graciebobcat · 13/02/2021 08:51

Your choice, but what a shame you won't be able to socialise with anyone when the rules are lifted.

GoldenPenPot · 13/02/2021 08:59

I wouldn’t try to argue with her. It’s her decision and (no offence) it’s not really possible to rationalise with people who’ve fallen down this particular rabbit hole.

thepeopleversuswork · 13/02/2021 09:02

@Graciebobcat

Your choice, but what a shame you won't be able to socialise with anyone when the rules are lifted.
This.

And you can add, or go on holiday or to any public events or anything.

Morten · 13/02/2021 09:07

@1starwars2

Terrifying that she is talking other people out of it though. What if her neighbour catches covid and dies? Ask her if she is prepared to be responsible for that? For herself it's her decision but influencing others is very worrying.
Is her neighbour an adult and capable of making choices for herself?
Eleganz · 13/02/2021 09:07

I'd certainly be discussing it with her and doing what you can to encourage her to have it. Yes it is her choice, but as a loved one you surely should be trying your best to convince her to make the right choice?

Sadly many people have been taken in by all sorts of conspiracy woo. We must educate our citizens better in rational and critical thinking. People seem to think that believing the first thing some superficially charming person says on the internet or TV is "evidence" and then seem to take it as a personal insult when others disagree and try to point out the flaws in the argument they have adopted.

SidSparrow · 13/02/2021 09:10

@Graciebobcat

So we're ok with excluding people who won't get vaccinated? Even although it might not affect transmission?

Shall we round them up and put them in concentration health camps?

AdultHumanFemale · 13/02/2021 09:17

The evangelising aspect of adherence to conspiracy theories is the thing. If they just kept it to themselves, it wouldn't be quite so worrying.
I am agog when I hear that many are seeing lots of covid related conspiracy stuff in their SM feeds, that it is so pervasive. I've got one bonkers friend who spams this stuff all over FB all the time, worrying as she's a "wellness professional" with a huge following, stemming from much of the really good work she did prior to Covid. But she's just one person.

BonnieDundee · 13/02/2021 09:28

Your choice, but what a shame you won't be able to socialise with anyone when the rules are lifted

when did that law get passed? I must have missed it

BluebellsGreenbells · 13/02/2021 09:32

she proudly told me her neighbour was booked for their vaccine but she talked her out of it

I wouldn’t be so sure. Like all fanatics she will bang on until people agree with her, to her face! Then quietly go and get vaccinated.

Some people would rather nod and agree and ignore. I know I would!

My friend is also anti vaccine, but she’s had Covid already. Her choice, but even with her ramblings I’m still getting mine.