I don't want to drone on. But I'll try explain. I'm in a fairly new relationship. We both split from our ex's two years ago. In similar ways. We drifted apart and lost the intimacy etc. The only difference is I had children and a house. He had a dog and house with his ex. He's in his 40s and I'm 14 years younger. His ex was 10 years younger.
It was within days of us meeting she came up into conversation. I was abit put off if I'm honest. Not because they still get on. But the way he mentioned her felt like it was important for me to know about her. It didn't make much sense as they had no kids or marriage and were two years past splitting. It almost felt like he was saying she would always be a part of him and I got the vibes he hadn't gotten over her. It sounds like she started travelling and leaving him for holidays with her friends and they no longer had the same wants going ahead. He told me early on she occasionally went around still and asked if I was jealous. At that point I felt it wasn't for me and left things.
We got back in touch and I explained to him that I was absolutely fine with him getting on with her. But I wasn't interested in being involved if there were still feelings and I was always going to be in her shadow.
It's taken time. For example he only removed photos of her from his walls when he said he loved me a couple of months back. His Facebook page is full of her still. I really don't mind the pictures and memories. He asked me once if I thought he should remove them all. I said that was 100% his choice and not mine. He chose to keep them all. I must admit there are a few on there like her naked only wearing his football top that I wish he would lock down or remove. But holidays etc we all have a past.
I feel in my gut that he has moved on with me. He has said he loves me. He proves that with his actions and words. But I know that he still carries a part of her around more than perhaps is healthy for a new relationship. It's like the feeling, he's happy with me and putting his everything into it. But If he was honest he will always love her and will be gutted when she moves on and perhaps still hates that it failed with them.
Anyway we've started telling people we are involved and are progressing. Last week he was working somewhere that involved big machines that my son loves. So he's been tagging me in videos he's made for him to watch.
There's a bloke on his Facebook that has commented on everything since I've appeared if that makes sense? Just the last couple of weeks. He writes the most ridiculous comments. I've woken up this morning to a tagged video. My chap wrote above it I just love this machine. This blokes wrote under it. What as much as Sarah? (His ex) he has replied and said we split two years ago mate and put some laughing emojis. The bloke replied. I know.
Just trying to understand why that bloke has purposely dropped the ex into something I'm tagged in. Why after two years is she still bring mentioned so much? I can't express that I have no issues with her. I don't feel jealous of the past. I just can not believe an ex with no real baggage can still be so in the picture yet not in the picture. Seeing someone ask him if he loved something as much as her just makes me question if I'm missing something.