To keep my maiden name at work?

[OllietheOwl]

I’m about to return to the office after a years maternity leave. Prior to leaving I was known by my maiden name. I still had bank cards, passport in maiden name but always said when I had children I’d change everything to my married name (which I have done).

My maiden name is very unusual and I have built up a solid career under this name. My married name is much more common - for example I’m now officially “Katy Jones” rather than “Katy Vandenburg” (just examples!).

AIBU to keep my maiden name for work purposes only? It would mean my work email etc wouldn’t marry up with my personal documents.

I also have a first name that’s shortened - ie real name Catherine, shortened to Katy.

So potentially it could look like two completely different names: Katy Vandenburg at work but Catherine Jones on paper.

Or should I just get over it and go with my new name?

YABU - you’ve moved on now. Go with your official name and keep it simple

YANBU - keep your maiden name. Your career was based on this and being another Katy Jones will get lost in the system!

Re. random other replies on this thread: discarding my own name would never even have occurred to me.

My married name is my own name. Even more so than my birth name, because I made a choice to use it.

YANBU
You can also have your pre-married name on your passport too saying that you use it for professional purposes.

I use my very unusual maiden name for work.

I have both my married & maiden names in my passport which has made things a lot easier to prove who I am at times!

It's very common in my field.

My sister changed to her married name and told me she wished she hadn't as she and her husband now work for the same organisation and she's perceived as a bit of a hanger-on, even though she was there long before him

@unmarkedbythat

Re. random other replies on this thread: discarding my own name would never even have occurred to me.

My married name is my own name. Even more so than my birth name, because I made a choice to use it.

You must feel sorry for your husband then. Not having a name that he chose.

I changed my surname when I got married as I liked DH's name more than mine. I kept my maiden name for work, but I'm on payroll in my married name to make sure personnel records match up with HMRC and bank accounts.
This also means that when I give my email address to clients / service users they can't then try to find me outside of work.

I've never bothered to change my name at all, I do not see any point to it, married or not.

This is exactly what I have done. Kept my maiden name at work and also have a shortened name in work. I usually travel frequently and will just have to ensure future flights when we can travel are booked in the correct name.

I have done this and know quite a few other women who have. No problems.

Loads of lawyers I know did this.
One perk is that increases your privacy, clients and are less likely to find out where you live and other personal information.
Someone Google searching your professional name will only get professional results.

that, her very unique maiden surname at work and her very common married surname at home/private. She once said that it's only an issue with pay roll becuase (like you) she is Lizzy Snodgrass in work and Elizabeth Smith with the bank etc.

I think it's fairly common in medicine, I know of a couple of surgeons who have been "Ms Smith and Ms Jones" for years and years and have never changed to their married names

This! All finacial/ professional stuff is Dr Yoda. School and passports are Mrs DH's name.

Oh passport states " this person is Dr Yoda". On the notes section.

@Devlesko

How does it work with HMRC and other official agencies? I didn't know you could have 2 surnames, you learn something new everyday.

HMRC always know who you are. Your National Insurance number goes with you whatever you're called, so it doesn't matter.

Most places when you fill out identity checks also have "Are you or have you been known by any other name?" as a question, so it's all pretty standard.

So, if you change your name on marriage you can use any surname you want, at work?
So if I'm Mrs Martha Boswell I could become Martha Smith at work?

That was me screening out any potential men who didn't believe I had a right to my own name.

Good move. It came as a real surprise to me (elsewhere on this site) that some men are bothered by this, particularly as nobody's expecting them to change theirs. Or how easily some women acquiesce ('it' mattered to him'), etc.

Sometimes I think either Mumsnet exists in a parallel universe, or I do ...

@Devlesko

So, if you change your name on marriage you can use any surname you want, at work? So if I'm Mrs Martha Boswell I could become Martha Smith at work?

In theory.

Devlesko You can use any surname you like, so long as it's not with the intention of committing fraud.
You don't have to change your name by deed poll - you can just sk people to call you by a different name - but doing it by deed poll makes it official and gives you documentary evidence to show banks and other official bodies.
This info is from the UK government website: www.gov.uk/change-name-deed-poll

'sk' should be 'ask' - sorry!

Yes perfectly legal and fine to do this. All the government agencies will list that you own both names so you can use both of them however you want to. You don’t have to make your maiden name a dead name.

Im the exact same and it works really well for me, my family and my work.

I still have my maiden name at work. That's what they know me by. Also...I couldn't deal with any more admin!

Quite a lot of female doctors practise under their maiden names. YANBU.

I encountered problems when setting up my trading company when I went freelance. Setting up the company using my maiden name was ok but the bank (or at least the person dealing with my application) were very obstructive when I tried to open the company bank account. I needed to get things set up quickly so gave up in the end and reverted to my married name

My maternity leave form had a box for "professional name" - I worked in a university, and plenty of academics keep their maiden name if they've already had papers published when they marry.