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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not like sleeping 'face to face'

76 replies

tentimesaday · 02/02/2021 09:01

I dislike facing my partner when I sleep. I don't want to breath bad breath into their face all night (and I don't want them breathing my way either). Logically, sleeping back to back or in spoon formation are preferable. AIBU?

OP posts:
SmileyClare · 02/02/2021 09:51

Your dh sounds like he's being a pain in the arse about which way you face. Confused

Calling you "nuts" fussy, that he feels sad... what?! It all sounds very needy and a bit psycho. Why is he taking it so personally?

babbaloushka · 02/02/2021 09:52

Do yours not brush their teeth?! I much prefer to spoon, just comfier, but his breath doesn't factor.

MaxThePasta · 02/02/2021 09:57

Nope YANBU. I can't stand being breathed on. Even if we are spooning, if I can feel breath on my neck or shoulder or whatever I hate it. I usually sleep with pillows in between us.

I sleep much better when I'm not being touched at all. I'd prefer him to be right over the other side of the bed 🤣

unmarkedbythat · 02/02/2021 09:59

I don't care really. I go to sleep on my left side and that means I face the edge of the bed rather than the middle, but not because I want to avoid face to face sleeping. If we swapped sides of the bed I'd still go to sleep on my left side. Both of us move around and turn over quite a lot during the night and there are definitely periods we are facing one another, it's fine.

whenindoubtBake · 02/02/2021 09:59

I always do wonder in movies, when they wake up nose to nose talking to each each. I'm thinking...morning breath...

unmarkedbythat · 02/02/2021 10:01

Your dh is being weird though. I can't imagine whining to mine about how he prefers to sleep. I'd hate it if he wanted to direct how I bloody lay.

saraclara · 02/02/2021 10:01

but he used to get all sad about how I turned my back on him in bed.

I wish my late DH was around to see this thread. He used to find it sad that I rolled over with my back to him, too. Sad

Sally872 · 02/02/2021 10:05

Nope. We sleep at opposite ends ideally not touching! Next bed purchase will a bigger bed. It is too warm to sleep like that too.

We are affectionate and will cuddle, but for actually going to sleep less contact the better.

Couchbettato · 02/02/2021 10:06

Hot breath in my face? No thanks.

DappledThings · 02/02/2021 10:09

Nobody likes sleeping face to face do they? Poll is currently sitting at 1/99 and I'm surprised it's not 0/100!

AryaStarkWolf · 02/02/2021 10:09

@Sakesman

I need to show my dh this thread. Sure he thinks I’m a bitch for saying this.
Really? I can't imagine why anyone would like it, show him that Poll it's pretty unanimous Grin
Imapotato · 02/02/2021 10:10

I hate being breathed on, you are definitely not being unreasonable.

ChaToilLeam · 02/02/2021 10:11

I don’t even want anyone touching me while I sleep, let alone breathing on me. Yuk. We have a wee cuddle then I scoot over to the far side of the bed. If DP tries to follow me there he gets told to bugger off back to his own side.

CharlotteRose90 · 02/02/2021 10:19

God no I couldn’t sleep if a guy slept face to face with me. I always like to spoon him. Haha my favourite position is my head on his shoulders and gets me to sleep every time

Literallynoidea · 02/02/2021 10:26

I'm the same - don't want to breathe his exhaled air!

We sleep back to back.

HearMeSnore · 02/02/2021 10:28

I don't even like sleeping in the same room as another person, let alone face to face.

Sauvblanca · 02/02/2021 10:36

You need a superking size bed. I can barely reach DP if he's all the way over on his side and I'm on mine! We each have our own duvets too Grin

HighSpecWhistle · 02/02/2021 10:36

We toss and turn so now I put a pillow between our heads when we go to sleep. I hate people breathing on me and I don't want to breathe on him either. Works for us!

SmileyClare · 02/02/2021 10:38

Some of these responses are a bit extreme. I don't mind it occasionally. Sometimes you turn in your sleep and wake up face to face without realising. I mean I'm not total repulsed by my husband's face near mine.

Your partner is being weird about it though Op. He can't go all funny if you don't want to fall asleep like that.

fairyannie · 02/02/2021 10:43

My husband's breath comes out with the force of a leaf blower. I can't stand him even facing my back.

I 'hit/kick him in my sleep' Wink until he turns away from me.

shouldistop · 02/02/2021 10:44

Urgh horrible facing someone to sleep. I can't even have my dh spooning me as he breathes on my neck and leans on me.
I have to face his back or we both face away

squeekums · 02/02/2021 10:46

yep, hate being breathed on, hot 'used' air, no thanks
i like fresh air when i sleep, ive always got a fan on for this reason lol

MrsDThomas · 02/02/2021 10:47

I hate being breathed on and more to the point, i HATE the sound of someone breathing. My misophonia goes into overdrive and i want to smother him

BloodyDarrener · 02/02/2021 10:48

Yuck. Breath breathing. I'm very touchy feely and sleep better with my body touching DH but face to face? No. Only if he's tilting his head downwards tucked towards the duvet and my face is turned upwards the headboard! And that doesn't last long before I turn over. It doesn't have anything to do with bad breath. Even freshly brushed teeth doesn't make it okay.

sunflowersandbuttercups · 02/02/2021 10:49

Bleugh! I hate it too.

I either pointedly roll over or shove him and make him move Grin