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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you move abroad?

189 replies

stella139 · 31/01/2021 17:54

If you had the chance, would you move away from the UK?
Where to and for what reasons?
Just curious :)

YABU - yes I would move
YANBU - no I like living here

OP posts:
IncorrigibleTitmouse · 01/02/2021 06:15

I’ve lived in five different countries and hopefully I’ll live in more. Looking to come back to the UK in the next couple of years, but I definitely wouldn’t rule out going abroad again. I’d love to live in Sweden or Germany.

IncorrigibleTitmouse · 01/02/2021 06:20

Waving to @PineappleCrush10 fellow British expat in TX!

SuperCaliFragalistic · 01/02/2021 06:24

I would definitely like to move to New Zealand but I'm separated from DC dad and it wouldn't be fair to move them away from him. I would move away, to retire, when they're all grown up but then I would miss out on seeing grandkids etc. I could live in France or Italy instead but not while DC are young.

Alaimo · 01/02/2021 06:26

I did. Moved to Scandinavia last year. Just wanted a change of scenery really. Different landscape, language, culture. Of course a lot of the mundane day to day stuff is still the same, but with some differences, like going cross country skiing in my lunch break.

I like the pace of life here and people seem to have a better work life balance. In my workplace we (almost) all stop for a communal coffee break, have lunch together rather than at our desks (when we were working from the office), pretty much everyone goes home at 5, if not earlier, etc.

Roselilly36 · 01/02/2021 06:27

I would live anywhere as long as DH & DS’s are with me. I have no other immediate family, so I don’t feel anchored to the UK.

Sometimesonly · 01/02/2021 06:42

I did. Moved to Italy many years ago and stayed. I would quite like to move again but not until the kids are out of school. Also it would have to be in the EU so maybe France as at least I speak some French. I don't think I would want to learn a new language from scratch.

Clarinsmum · 01/02/2021 07:00

I was born and brought up abroad (non EU) moved back with my British dad as a teen. Lived in London for 20 years then did a few years in Asia with DH and DS. Now back in Uk and very grateful to be here. I don’t understand British people who seem to hate this country, they just don’t appreciate how lucky they are!!

yearinyearout · 01/02/2021 07:19

Yes I would, at the right time. Once we retire I'd quite happily retire to various parts of Spain or Portugal to relax in the sun. Ideally I'd like to spend half the year in the sun and half here, but brexshit has put paid to that dream.

CorvusPurpureus · 01/02/2021 07:31

Yes. Moved to the ME 6 years ago to teach, with my dc. We love it, have a fantastic life & feel very settled.

Have missed being able to pop back to the U.K. twice a year to see family - it's been over a year now because of covid.

But I'd definitely rather be stuck here than there in a pandemic, so there's that...at least I'm bored doing online teaching by the pool, rather than staring out of the window at drizzle...

peak2021 · 01/02/2021 07:38

I would be doing so had it not been for Brexit, which has made it more difficult, and it was a plan for retirement albeit a few years away. I have ruled this out now.

VinceNoirsShinyBoots · 01/02/2021 07:42

Yes I think so. I wouldn’t want to move to the other side of the world (as much as I am sure we’d love New Zealand) but somewhere a short plane ride away so that we could still see family. We’re planning to move to the opposite end of the UK in the next few years and it’ll be further from where we are now than some parts of Spain, France, Germany, The Netherlands and Belgium!

Hippywannabe · 01/02/2021 07:57

Has anyone moved to Finland? I lived there for a year when I left college and loved it.

everythingbackbutyou · 01/02/2021 08:51

@Onesailwait, with a user name like that you must be in/near Vancouver !! Moved here 16 years ago, never moving back to UK.

Flatoutonsofa · 01/02/2021 09:12

Absolutely. I'd go pretty much anywhere in Europe that was affordable. I wouldn't put down any permanent roots, though, such as buying a house, until I'd lived in a place for at least six months. I worry for people on programmes such as A Place in the Sun who up sticks and buy a place in an area they don't really know.

mindutopia · 01/02/2021 09:20

At the moment in my life, no because we are settled, dh has a business and I have a job I love, and we've been trying to buy a house for the past year (thanks, COVID) and I want to be here.

But in general, yes, I didn't grow up in the UK and I've worked both in Africa and in Asia, and I loved it. It was a different time in life when I didn't want to be as routed as I am now. But we would definitely look to buy a house, probably in Asia, and spend part of the year there when we retire (which is still a good 2 decades away, so who knows what will happen in the meantime!).

WhatWouldZenoDo · 01/02/2021 10:04

Yeh, a place in the sun! you'd worry for Geoffrey and Vivienne in rural Portugal without a word of portuguese........ but, is it easier to make friends when you do that move abroad thing?

I sometimes think about moving to Alicante. I am European not British and I speak Spanish so I could, but it is still scary. Does the heat make you happy!? I think it makes an ordinary every day a bit nicer, but am I wrong? Do you hedonically adapt?

I wouldn't know who I was aiming to make friends with, expats or Spaniards. I don't have a big family. Two teens, so this is all academic right now, but my head is all over the place thinking about where my future is right now. Feel like there's some puzzle that needs to be figured out. I need to be more mindful.

WhatWouldZenoDo · 01/02/2021 10:07

@SexyGiraffe

Yes, moved to Spain five years ago with DH and DD. It's been wonderful but may have to come back soon for family reasons. Not thrilled about what has happened to the UK in the meantime but we'll make it work.
Where did you move to? Did you feel integrated/included ? Even with spanish I'd be wary buying a house and setting up the utilities etc!
Avaganda · 01/02/2021 12:01

Out of interest, what sort of industries are people in where a country actually wants you?! DH and I are in quite low paid, low skilled jobs so I don't think we'd get anywhere. My worry is that retraining and gaining experience in another field will take years and by then my children will be secondary age and I wouldn't want to unsettle them. Wish I'd worked harder at school and actually made some plans ☹

MaverickDanger · 01/02/2021 14:14

@Avaganda DH is an engineer so on the skills shortage list for most countries. I’m a project manager.

It’s worth having a look at countries you might like to move to, and what jobs they are lacking. Moving abroad is hard & expensive - we are lucky that we have been expats each time so our companies have paid for us to relocate & our accommodation, bills, flights home, even a daily food allowance.

The only place I’d do it on our own is DH’s home country.

MooseBeTimeForSummer · 01/02/2021 14:34

Moved to Canada 10 years ago.

gwenneh · 01/02/2021 14:39

@Avaganda

Out of interest, what sort of industries are people in where a country actually wants you?! DH and I are in quite low paid, low skilled jobs so I don't think we'd get anywhere. My worry is that retraining and gaining experience in another field will take years and by then my children will be secondary age and I wouldn't want to unsettle them. Wish I'd worked harder at school and actually made some plans ☹
DH is a software developer and we've generally followed the opportunities his work presents. He's basically in demand everywhere, at his level of seniority.

I'm a marketing director, there have always been roles for me no matter where we lived, but we've only debated moving on the strength of my career once (and didn't, because I'm happier in the role I'm in now.)

Ragwort · 01/02/2021 14:42

Yes, I'd love to and we have tried to relocate to the US some time ago but too difficult with visa requirements etc. We did live in the US for a year which was great.

Kobanidaughters · 01/02/2021 15:46

@Avaganda DH is a software architect, his company paid for us to come to the US and consequently Green Cards. I couldn’t work for the first few years and that was really hard, now U.K. working again and re-establishing my career so it grow here but will also put me back in the same level as here if we move back to the U.K. I wouldn’t do another move where I had to start all over again - even if he was paid mega bucks to compensate, I have hated being financially dependant

Guylan · 01/02/2021 23:45

@480Widdio

We lived in Italy for many years.

Came back to the U.K. and have no wish to live anywhere else now.

May I ask why @480Widdio? Always always had this - ridiculous I’m sure - fantasy notion living in Italy would be great. The climate, food, language etc
fungster · 02/02/2021 00:03

Yes, we've lived overseas (US) for just about twenty years now. All of my children were born here. There's a Welsh word, Hiraeth, which roughly translates to a homesickness for a place or time that didn't really exist. That's how I feel when I think of England. My nostalgia is not for the reality of everyday life, but rather something that likely was never there.