To ask what you wish you could say to a horrible employer on your last day?

[MaMaD1990]

Inspired by another thread. If it didn't burn bridges, what do you wish you said to horrible boss/colleagues on your last day? Lighthearted! I used to fantasise drop kicking my old manager on my way out the door.

So long and thanks for all the share options guys. You’ve made me very happy today.

I freelanced (for a LONG time) for a company that had a really vile culture. Based around everyone being petrified of the MD. I never was, we got on fine - but if you showed fear, he played on it. Ultimately, very twattish, I realise.

Was 21 when I started, and was utterly stupid with it. Didn't get a contract in place (first ever freelance role) and was a bit in awe of the organisation (multimillion, biggest in their field, although very specific). Worked there for 6 years, directly with the MD, on some very sensitive projects. Eventually I grew some balls, and wanted some security - a contract, namely! They refused to even entertain signing anything, I spoke to the boss many times, to no avail, and was basically told to put up and shut up.

When DH and I wanted to buy our first house, I decided I needed some security. When I was approached elsewhere for an employed role, I took it. References came from previous freelance clients, all good.

Sent an email to the MD, copied in the chairman and directors, explaining exactly why I was leaving, and giving a weeks' notice - no contract, no problem 🤷🏻‍♀️

Boss was NOT HAPPY. But did enjoy telling him that this could have been avoided if he'd agreed to protect himself, as well as me. Was utterly beautiful when his chairman piled on and went bananas at him.

[quote Wilkolampshade]@IncludeWomenInTheSequel 'Mine isn't really light-hearted. I wanted to tell them that I done everything they had asked of me - things nobody else had ever managed to do - and they took it and made it seem like I'd done something terribly wrong and broke it, all on the whim of the manipulative old pervert owner of the business. I wait for the day his conduct comes out in the press. I will fucking celebrate.'

I had an almost identical experience and tbh, it broke me for a while. I resigned, knowing they were trying to lever me out. They found out I was applying for another post in the organisation and actually tried to directly interfere in the recruitment process telling my future boss that I should be barred from the site. 🙄 I have been forever grateful that he decided to make his own mind up and stood up to them and I worked happily there for a further couple of years. Took a little longer to get my confidence back. Still makes me a bit sick thinking about it.[/quote]
@Wilkolampshade God I know that feeling. I still feel sick when I think about it too much as well.

I was made redundant so the bastards had to pay me to leave: that was the best outcome, and I'd hung on for at least a year hoping it was coming. I've now got a job on the same salary which is interesting, and fun, and no pressure, and nobody makes me feel bad about myself just for existing.

It's a really hard thing to get over. My confidence is getting there though, I've been promoted since starting my new job so it's helped to see that, actually, the problem wasn't me, it was them.

I wish I'd told my boss he was a bully and a cunt.

Because, he's a bully and a cunt.

Nothing.

And no ceremony: no phony announcements about my contribution, no gifts, no cards, no leaving 'do' (ugh). The only thing I want from them is silence.

@IncludeWomenInTheSequel agreed, and in some ways, as I'm nearing the end of my career I doubt I'll ever completely get over it, it just makes me a slightly different person, a little bent out of shape and a little lacking in confidence. However, the people who really orchestrated the whole thing came to a v sticky end as various misdemeanours of theirs came to light. They can't hurt me now, which is some relief.
Huge huge congrats on your promotion Success truly is the best revenge. 😊

I feel the same Wilko. It'll always be lurking underneath, which is really sad. I am keeping a distant eye - the company has hard a very hard pandemic and I'd love to see the vile old bastard have to sell his plane. I don't think it's coming but you never know...

It's you. Not me

To answer the question OP, I wish I'd said, "You are someone whose insecurities and need for male validation make her a danger in the workplace to all other women perceived as a threat. You use behaviours such as playground nick-name calling as a cover for bullying and show an astonishing readiness to lie and cheat, in the very literal sense, to get what you want. You have wasted huge resources on self agrandising vanity projects none of which have come to fruition. You can't manage people because at heart, you despise them and enjoy ve-littling them at every opportunity despite professing to be deeply Christian.... You are physically and intellectually lazy, vapid and unoriginal. Oh, and you really should do something about that smell... "

@CouldItBeJeffrey

I always regretted not giving one vile boss what for. However, he's still there 18 years later and I'm not so that's good enough for me.

Similar to me. I had the boss from hell for four years. 9 years on, she is still there, no doubt making people miserable. The only thing I can say is that the company was taken over by a much larger organisation with a massive HR team so maybe she has to rein it in a bit.

When I left she had had 8 direct reports and had sacked/caused to leave four of them. A 50% attrition rate isn't good.

I wanted to leave so many times but my DH told me to hold on - eventually I left with a generous settlement which was something. It is amazing that so many employers would rather do that than deal with useless managers though.

Fingers crossed @IncludeWomenInTheSequel

Both you and the agency lied to me on relevant questions that I asked at interview.
You never intended that I should work on xyz project, because you wanted to do that yourself, so why did you waste 4 weeks of my time and mental energy training me on a system that I would not be using.
You had no idea what you wanted me to deliver and changed your mind 3 times in the last 3 meetings we had (that was just on the approach, not even the deliverables).
Due to the set up you knew that I would not be able to fulfil the requirements, particularly for remote working (security aspects rather than technical).
Your process seemed to change every time we went through it and was not documented anywhere for reference. I tried to document it, but failed miserably due to the constant changes.
Kindly do not patronise people, who have at least twice your experience. Be clear about what you want to achieve and answer any questions honestly. If you do not know the answer, you are more than welcome to ask for suggestions, which can be discussed and agreed upon.
Never say to anyone, let alone repeat on numerous occasions, that they are a "wealthy contractor". You do not know the other person's circumstances.
Please ensure that you do your own work, rather than disappearing off for hours on end to "meetings".
Understand that there is a world of difference between BAU (Business As Usual) and projects.

I would have loved to have told a previous boss that being able to tell everyone how to communicate better does not mean that they are a good communicator, and the reason so many good people (including me) had left was because he was totally incapable of telling people what needed to be done in a way that was understandable and did not need clarifying over and over again. It is hugely stressful to have to ask several times exactly what is required, then spend time basically working your guts out to do what you think is a good piece of work that fits the brief, only to be told it is wrong and you need to do it again (sometimes because he had just moved the goalposts).

@MaMaD1990 Your story about the retiring headteacher made me laugh