To think students above Y9 of critical workers don’t really need to be in school

[Feelingsosadandguilty]

Just that really. Work in a school and the numbers of students this time around is crazy. Looked at the numbers yesterday and many are years 10 & 11. We regularly get calls from parents of the older year groups wanting a place as their child’s friends are there so they would like a place. Yes there are a few cases where they may really need that place for personal reasons but surely a 14/15 should be able to stay home. The message just doesn’t seem to get through that you should only send you child to school if you really have to not for a social with their friends. The abuse we are getting for advising this is unbelievable.

School is more than just childcare though surely???

@m0therofdragons

Take privileges away? What? Ground them? Removing access to friends at a point when they’re struggling sounds like a recipe for disaster so you go to work and return to discover your 15yo has done nothing but you have to work the following day. What do you realistically do? You can’t remove internet access as they wouldn’t be able to them access online learning!

The school can't sanction them either though. What are they actually getting from school apart from being able to mix with their friends (if they are also there), keep spreading the virus and ensuring that schools don't open for everyone else. I think those sending them in just because they don't trust them to work at home are being very selfish.

@RubyandPearl

School is more than just childcare though surely???

Not at the moment.

I do agree the younger year groups should be prioritised and “because their mates are in school” isn’t a valid reason.

If at least one parent is WFH I don’t think there’s a need for a high school age student to be in school unless there’s other reasons such as additional needs. But if both/single parents are out of the house at work then I think it’s ok. I would hope most 13+ year olds can be left alone for a while, but I don’t think it’s unreasonable if a 13 year old can’t be left alone for 10+ hours all day if parents are commuting and working.

I'd have agreed with you at the start of the week. However, after yesterday's parents evening where both children got appalling feedback, along with no solution to get back on track - other than "work harder", it's clear that this lockdown is affecting my kids far more than I thought.
It's a completely unnatural situation. I won't send them into school, but they definitely need to be in school. I can understand why others are.

I read a thread yesterday about people struggling to remain motivated at work - so of course children are also finding it hard. There is teaching children self reliance (important skills of course), then there is expecting them to get on with it without offering any support. I'm really worried about my children.

I hope you don’t work in my school, OP.

It's the same at my school, we have loads of year 9+ students in, many of them because the parents can't get them to do the work at home. Almost 50% of these students have parents wfm.
3 bubbles burst this week so that's lots at home now. The staff can't go within 2 metres of the students and they're doing live lessons whilst supervising. The students in school are doing the exact same work as those at home.

I think years 10 and 11 are a very vulnerable age to have no supervision but overall we should stop judging others and let schools work with families individually for what their needs are.

@YippieKayakOtherBuckets so do I !!

DSS is 17 and, for reasons that are 100% valid for his/our/the house's safety, he is not allowed home alone at any point.

Something happened over the summer to highlight that he is not mature enough to a) study alone and b) act respectfully in our house.

It's not too much of an issue as I WFH and if me and DP want to go out somewhere together he will come with us or - in normal times - go to DP's mum's. But we rarely go out to places that aren't a family day out anyway.

But yeah. If I didn't WFH, and he had the opportunity to be in college, he would absolutely have to be. Otherwise we get home and things are damaged, he's had friends round, money is missing from our pockets/purse/bags etc. It's not great.

100% happy for those who have lovely, reliable kids who wouldn't do things like that.

As a key worker and mother to a 15 year old I just wanted to put my side across. Im a single parent and key worker so have to go into work, my daughter is home alone every day doing her school work. I trust her and she's sensible. However, her mental health has taken a huge nose dive. She's not eating lunch or taking breaks due to just working through and no one with her in the house. Shes lonely and sometimes scared. So yeah, im 100% behind any parent sending their older kids into school.

By taking privileges away if not

What privileges? Seriously? Teens have fuck all available to them at the moment.

@summersolstice43

As a key worker and mother to a 15 year old I just wanted to put my side across. Im a single parent and key worker so have to go into work, my daughter is home alone every day doing her school work. I trust her and she's sensible. However, her mental health has taken a huge nose dive. She's not eating lunch or taking breaks due to just working through and no one with her in the house. Shes lonely and sometimes scared. So yeah, im 100% behind any parent sending their older kids into school.

Which she be any less lonely at school though? I'm sure the majority of people would be sending students of that age to school so she will probably be be sat as a computer all day on teams at school with no friends to talk to. At least at home, they can face time friends and chat during breaks.

Which would

A student in GCSE year will be expected to be able to undertake independent study or work independently without constant supervision from September, if they really can’t manage this at home now I’d be really concerned how they will manage when they leave school.

I work in a school. The circumstances of each child are only given out to staff on a need to know basis. If the child is deemed to have qualified for a place in school during the current lockdown then it is no one else's business why they are school, including other staff at the school who are not privvy to the circumstances.

I think that the key worker provision for attending school has been too wide a definition, and am not surprised that some parents are wanting it to be stretched. Especially now that it is known to be until 8 March at least, and teenagers can test the patience of parents at the best of times.

Depending on the level of abuse, if it is extreme then using whatever process the school has for nuisance and abusive calls should be followed.

It may be worth the school re-emphasing that the answer will be no to all parents.

Dd is nearly 14 and yr9. We applied for a keyworker place but as she was the only yr 9 it was declined. Quite often dh is the same hours as me which means leaving her home alone from 530 am. I'd love her to be in school on these days but shes having to manage.

@OppsUpsSide

A student in GCSE year will be expected to be able to undertake independent study or work independently without constant supervision from September, if they really can’t manage this at home now I’d be really concerned how they will manage when they leave school.

Yes, but there's independent study, and there's leaving the children alone and isolated, with only a screen for company. No clear targets, totally unclear on what they're working towards - is there an exam? teacher assessment? do the mocks count?

I honestly though my highly motivated and high achieving daughter was cracking on with home schooling. She isn't. She's really really struggling with the changing boundaries and very angry. I am struggling to cope with what to do and the school have not responded with kindness. They have recommended she works harder.

I have SN child in Year 10 at a special secondary school. Only him and 2 others going in on his form group and his teaching set. Other children are supposed to be logging on for 5 lessons each day. It isn't happening. He has told me only 1 or 2 people are logging on for all lessons and a few others just log on for Art or a lesson they like. These Year 10 kids will be doing exams next year. They have missed do much school they need to be in school. Kids wear masks all day in every lesson bar outside PE and distancing no problem as only 3 kids and teacher there. Teachers take LF tests every week and also wear masks all day in every lesson and form time. You can't generalise to all schools just from your school.

My daughter in year 10 goes in 3 days a week, whilst I'm out onsite. She needs the structure to help her. I don't feel guilty about it at all. Could she stay home all day and stay motivated, no. When we are home all she needs is a very gentle eye on her and she's brilliant but she still needs it. And emotionally she went to pieces when schools were closed again worrying it would be months and months home alone again without me there all day. So she goes in. Why do people keep raising these threads weekly and making is feel so guilty for going out to work and doing right by our children

I've just had a really tough day on the rota in school dealing with some of our most challenging KS4 students, and I still think YABU and really judgmental.

Well I am totally floored by some of these replies and the obvious lack of understanding of what I was actually saying and in some the lack of understanding of the current situation in schools. I am neither being nosy, judgmental or naive or any of the other insulting words I have been labeled. Maybe my title was wrong the but thought I was clear in that I was asking if the students should be in unless they “really needed”to be there. I also said that understand that some should be as families personal situations are all different. I simply do not understand the numbers this time who are asking to send students into school who DO NOT have a genuine reason to but simply because they want to be with friends, yes again I do know families have valid reasons and I am not getting at them at all. We would all love time to be with friends and family but this is something none of us can do in the current climate. Having 2 teenagers myself and having to go to work in the school I do know exactly how this can effect those kids. I do also thank those who have commented with understanding for the situation.

Please don't ask this question op. You have no idea of the individual circumstances of the child and families

I think in year 10 whilst I was able to be home alone had I done it long term my mental health would’ve collapsed. My parents were out about 7:30-6:30 Monday Friday, totally fine before and after school alone. However I wouldn’t have coped day after day being alone.

I think that’s fairly normal, it’s almost living alone- add in the emotions of a pandemic and school would’ve been a necessary protective base. I was bright, well-behaved and high achieving so I’m Sure I’d have been one labelled as able to cope. I know I wouldn’t have the resilience. After a few weeks I’d be in bed most the day, not eating, depressed and sliding into serious mental health difficulties. I still needed touch and contact, I know many adults alone in this pandemic have support bubbles for this reason- let alone 14 year olds.

Just be kind, it’s not really going to change anything if a few kids are in.