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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask her to wear a mask?

35 replies

LemonSherbetFancies · 26/01/2021 21:29

Employing a housekeeper/nanny for when I have to take temporary care of my grandkids.
Aibu to ask the lady I am thinking of taking on, to wear a mask for the full 5 hour shifts?

OP posts:
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 26/01/2021 21:32

The only way I could see this being reasonable is if you (and children dependant on age) also wear a mask.

Baker0104 · 26/01/2021 21:36

@LemonSherbetFancies you can ask... But be prepared for them to say no. At the very least you should also offer to wear a mask and depending on the age of the children they should too. I'm a nanny and this has been debated a fair bit on nanny forums but the general consensus is that nannies wouldn't be willing to wear a mask to work

LagneyandCasey · 26/01/2021 21:39

It's not unreasonable to request her to wear one in enclosed spaces, as long as you and other adults in the home wear one around her too.

Iknowwhatudidlastsummer · 26/01/2021 21:41

Unless she knows how to wear them properly, I don't think a mask is that efficient over 5 hours anyway. And as a nanny will be in close contact with the children, you need to be realistic.

Some childminders here refuse to take children after school, where they have been in contact with others. They are trying to minimise the risk for their mindees.

I would want to know where else she is working and decide then. It's a reasonable question, and of course you cannot know anything about her private life.

Original poster
LemonSherbetFancies · 26/01/2021 21:44

She said she is in no contact with other children but I am still concerned and would like her to wear one.

OP posts:
VetiverAndLavender · 26/01/2021 21:47

I agree that it might not make a difference, anyway, when she'll be in your home for five hours, interacting closely with the children.

Also, depending on the age of the children, it might make her job much more difficult (more challenging to engage with a young child when they can't see your face, your voice is muffled, etc.).

Baker0104 · 26/01/2021 21:54

@LemonSherbetFancies

Baker0104 · 26/01/2021 21:55

@LemonSherbetFancies sorry sent that too early. Are you willing to wear a mask too? Have you asked her and she's said no?

480Widdio · 26/01/2021 22:02

As long as you and your family wear masks as well,I see no problem.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 26/01/2021 22:03

Only fair that you wear masks to protect her also.

JollyHolly30 · 26/01/2021 22:10

No I don't think this would be reasonable.
I think if you can't look after them yourself you'll have to compromise on the mask. A nanny will be in such close contact with your young grandchildren that the mask isn't going to make a difference in reducing the risk of you catching Covid.

Original poster
LemonSherbetFancies · 26/01/2021 22:25

She's said no anyway so that's that.

OP posts:
00100001 · 26/01/2021 22:27

YABU.

WithinAForestDark · 26/01/2021 22:29

Will you be wearing a mask as well? I see you have been asked this several times - can you clarify?

Original poster
LemonSherbetFancies · 26/01/2021 22:38

No because I am barely leaving the house.
It doesn't matter now anyway as she has declined the offer.

OP posts:
00100001 · 26/01/2021 22:39

Of course OP won't be wearing one

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 26/01/2021 22:40

I'm not sure why some people think that the OP is being unreasonable? I'm a nurse and wear a mask over a 12 hour shift to protect the people that I care for - what's the difference with the nanny?

KrisAkabusi · 26/01/2021 22:40

I'll be honest, if you asked me to wear a mask, but said you weren't prepared to, I probably would say no too. Keep that in mind when you ask the next person.

Joinedjustforthispost · 26/01/2021 22:46

Yabu op you are expecting nanny to wear a mask to protect yourself but are not happy to wear a mask in return to protect nanny? It only works if everyone is wearing a mask , I haven’t got issue with you wanting nanny to wear a mask it’s the fact that you won’t return the favour !

00100001 · 27/01/2021 09:24

@AwaAnBileYerHeid

I'm not sure why some people think that the OP is being unreasonable? I'm a nurse and wear a mask over a 12 hour shift to protect the people that I care for - what's the difference with the nanny?
Because you're working in a high covid risk area with incredibly vulnerable people.

Plus you will be adhering to excellent prevention measures. Plus the majority of others will be doing the same.

OPs nanny, is in a house for 5 hours, in close quarters with kids, so the non-medical maks provides minimal protection. Additionally other adults in this confined space are not taking the same measures.

So it's almost pointless for the Nanny to be wearing a mask. It won't protect against transmission.

Imapotato · 27/01/2021 09:31

I think it’s perfectly reasonable, and quite sensible so long as you’re also happy to wear one whenever you’re around her. If you want to protect your health from her, she has the right to expect the same from you.

Excited101 · 27/01/2021 09:42

YABU. Of course she’s not going to look after young children in your home for all that time, wearing a mask. It wouldn’t make any difference if she’s touching everything anyway, and could be really confusing for the children.

Cuntitinthebin · 27/01/2021 09:45

Don't blame her.

NailsNeedDoing · 27/01/2021 10:02

Understandable that she’s said no tbh. If you still want her you could offer shorter hours spread over more days so that it’s easier for you to confine yourself to one room for a couple of hours while she works?

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 27/01/2021 10:15

@AwaAnBileYerHeid

I'm not sure why some people think that the OP is being unreasonable? I'm a nurse and wear a mask over a 12 hour shift to protect the people that I care for - what's the difference with the nanny?
Hospitals and GPs expect patients to wear masks too where it is possible to protect their staff. Most people are saying that if Nanny is expected to wear a mask, then it's reasonable to ask the family to wear a mask to protect her too.

I appreciate that many NHS staff are looking after people who can't wear masks - just making the point that where reasonable mask wearing should be two way. Thanks for all that you do

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