To still be texting him?

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

I know what I should be doing and why I should be doing it, but for the love of God why am I not doing it?

For context I was ghosted 5 months ago by someone I was with for just over 7 months, it came completely out of the blue and it really hurt me.
In that time I called 3 times in the first two weeks and have text him 4 times and have been ignored. Last week I sent a message to all my contacts by mistake and he replied to me asking if we could talk.
I left it a few days as I was thinking about whether to reply or not, in the end I did and said yes I would like to talk, however since then we haven’t actually said anything he was meant to call last night after work but didn’t, which has pissed me off a bit but not unexpected.
I feel really ranty today and want to know why he actually done it.

I’ve pretty much got over it and definitely don’t want to be with him anymore, but why do I feel myself wanting to message or call him to get those answers?

I just don’t get what goes though people’s minds when they do things like this.
At first I was genuinely worried about him, as we had barely gone a day without speaking with each other the whole time we were together.

I don’t need him, but definitely did want him.

@Nowiknowimanidiot

I just don’t get what goes though people’s minds when they do things like this. At first I was genuinely worried about him, as we had barely gone a day without speaking with each other the whole time we were together.

I don’t need him, but definitely did want him.

And probably still do.

There is a difference between knowing your worth and still wanting the person you had.

There’s nothing wrong with feeling that way OP it’s natural. However you must realise now though that’s all it is. If he came knocking on your door you need to be strong and firm.

Old things often pop back up... it’s not necessarily for good intentions sometimes.

My response ‘let’s play a game of fuck off, you go first’ although he seems quite good at that already! He won’t give you answers and I know how hard that is, still wondering wtaf from a relationship 15 years ago. Have moved on but I just want to know.

That’s the thing I just want to know!
I don’t care if the truth is ugly, it’s got to be a hell of a lot better than the crap that went through my mind.

@Nowiknowimanidiot

That’s the thing I just want to know! I don’t care if the truth is ugly, it’s got to be a hell of a lot better than the crap that went through my mind.

I get it, OP.

Please don't behave like a fanny over this man. You are so much better than that. Stay strong.