To still be texting him?

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

I know what I should be doing and why I should be doing it, but for the love of God why am I not doing it?

For context I was ghosted 5 months ago by someone I was with for just over 7 months, it came completely out of the blue and it really hurt me.
In that time I called 3 times in the first two weeks and have text him 4 times and have been ignored. Last week I sent a message to all my contacts by mistake and he replied to me asking if we could talk.
I left it a few days as I was thinking about whether to reply or not, in the end I did and said yes I would like to talk, however since then we haven’t actually said anything he was meant to call last night after work but didn’t, which has pissed me off a bit but not unexpected.
I feel really ranty today and want to know why he actually done it.

I’ve pretty much got over it and definitely don’t want to be with him anymore, but why do I feel myself wanting to message or call him to get those answers?

[bloodyhairy]

Please don't behave like a fanny over this man. You are so much better than that. Stay strong.

[Wheresmykimchi]

@Nowiknowimanidiot

That’s the thing I just want to know!
I don’t care if the truth is ugly, it’s got to be a hell of a lot better than the crap that went through my mind.

I get it, OP.

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

That’s the thing I just want to know!
I don’t care if the truth is ugly, it’s got to be a hell of a lot better than the crap that went through my mind.

[BashfulClam]

My response ‘let’s play a game of fuck off, you go first’ although he seems quite good at that already! He won’t give you answers and I know how hard that is, still wondering wtaf from a relationship 15 years ago. Have moved on but I just want to know.

[Poppyseeds2]

There’s nothing wrong with feeling that way OP it’s natural. However you must realise now though that’s all it is. If he came knocking on your door you need to be strong and firm.

Old things often pop back up... it’s not necessarily for good intentions sometimes.

[Wheresmykimchi]

@Nowiknowimanidiot

I just don’t get what goes though people’s minds when they do things like this.
At first I was genuinely worried about him, as we had barely gone a day without speaking with each other the whole time we were together.

I don’t need him, but definitely did want him.

And probably still do.

There is a difference between knowing your worth and still wanting the person you had.

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

I just don’t get what goes though people’s minds when they do things like this.
At first I was genuinely worried about him, as we had barely gone a day without speaking with each other the whole time we were together.

I don’t need him, but definitely did want him.

[Notmoreuodates5]

You don’t need him OP.

[partyatthepalace]

Because he is a manipulative knob, using behaviours designed to hook you.

However you do have the power to ignore him - so do that. It’s not true that you ‘can’t’ - don’t disempower yourself - you’ve already got him trying to do that.

[Wheresmykimchi]

@DuchessofHastings1

What a cunt.

This ghosting craze that's been going on these past few years is beyond me. Its disgusting and cowardly - especially after 7 month.

I honestly think if it happened to me I'd go Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. I would hunt him down to the corners of the earth and go totally bat shit.

I had a guy chucked me out the blue . Hurt but fine. Came back, wanted to meet and talk. Came to the day of meeting and did it againi went batshit and said things I shouldn't have said. Now I'm the arsehole and he can barely look me in the eye.

[DuchessofHastings1]

What a cunt.

This ghosting craze that's been going on these past few years is beyond me. Its disgusting and cowardly - especially after 7 month.

I honestly think if it happened to me I'd go Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. I would hunt him down to the corners of the earth and go totally bat shit.

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

@DuchessofHastings1 I did actually send him a text saying that and I only wanted to wtf had happend, but I wasn’t interested in rekindling anything. Gave him 30 mins to respond, he didn’t so I’ve blocked him.

[DuchessofHastings1]

And then block him. I think you need to establish you weren't to rekindle things, well I would anyway. Couldn't let someone think I was that easy to pick up and throw away again.

[DuchessofHastings1]

I would text him saying.

"Ok. So your a double ghoster and wanker. The message was sent by mistake, don't assume I wanted to rekindle anything. I only wanted to speak with you to see if you have the decency or the balls to give me an explanation as to why you go out with someone for 7 months and then out of the blue cut contact without giving them a reason why. I can see I was wrong. Don't message me again."

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

I’ve blocked him!
I’ve just sat in the bath and had a little cry, because I know what everyone says is right he’s not going to give me an answer and will ghost me again.

It hurts a bit, but I am for the most part over it. I’ve been through worse breakups than this and I’ve survived.

[1Morewineplease]

It sounds like you haven't got over him.
There's also a whiff of " I don't want to get over him."
The only way to get over him is to block him completely.
I'm suspecting that you're not really willing to.

[DrManhattan]

Delete his number. Hes gonna ghost you twice. Just get rid

[Wheresmykimchi]

@Nowiknowimanidiot

Of course I felt rejected and I know it wasn’t me, there was no abuse we hadn’t even had an argument and everything seemed to be going really well, so it completely threw me of balance.

I am over it and him, I’ve done the whole crying feeling sorry for myself part and am better now, that’s how I know I do not want him I will never go back there, because I know I’m worth more than that. But I still want to know why.

Ignore PP - it's natural to think he's an idiot but still want to know why!

[shakeitoffshakeacocktail]

Let us know when you have blocked then deleted him. With proof! 🙈

[letsdolunch321]

Have you blocked him yet @Nowiknowimanidiot ?!?!

[Besiegedbykillersquirrels]

When there is a bad smell in the bathroom you flush it away, you don't leave it there to keep sniffing. Flush him and all his bullshit completely away. He's irrelevant. Even if he does end up phoning it's doubtful he'll tell the truth. I can't see any good coming from it. Forget him and move on.

[dudsville]

OP, you still want to know why. What do you think would be a reason that would adequately explain his behaviour such that you could move on?

(Pro tip, there's never a good enough reason for this)

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

I don’t even know what answer I’m expecting.

[Josette77]

What answer do you think you would get? If he wanted to talk to you, he would. He's not interested. That is the why.

[Nowiknowimanidiot]

Of course I felt rejected and I know it wasn’t me, there was no abuse we hadn’t even had an argument and everything seemed to be going really well, so it completely threw me of balance.

I am over it and him, I’ve done the whole crying feeling sorry for myself part and am better now, that’s how I know I do not want him I will never go back there, because I know I’m worth more than that. But I still want to know why.