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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Dyspraxia and childs feedback

33 replies

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 21:37

Hi, so I’m hoping to get some advice to see if I’m being over sensitive. My son is has dyspraxia and sensory processing disorder. We are homeschooling at the moment and he keeps receiving feedback on his work such as can you practice writing on the line and can you add more detail to your drawings (work was to do with labelling, labels all done correctly).

I may be being over sensitive but they know he has dyspraxia, he is currently attending weekly ot sessions, doing daily home exercises and is otherwise very able with schoolwork. I just feel he is being kind of penalised for something that he has no control over as his writing isn’t good and he hates drawing as it hurts his hand.

I know teachers are run ragged at the moment so not to slate them at all but if your child has dyspraxia do they often get feedback about presentation?

Thanks

OP posts:

OwlBeThere · 19/01/2021 21:44

I think it’s ok to mention it tbh. I’m dyspraxic and have children with ASD, adhd, dyslexia and dyspraxia. I think reminding them to work on those issues Is fine.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 21:47

@OwlBeThere

I think it’s ok to mention it tbh. I’m dyspraxic and have children with ASD, adhd, dyslexia and dyspraxia. I think reminding them to work on those issues Is fine.

Thanks for your advice, If I’m honest I just feel sorry for him when it’s mentioned in his feedback as he works so hard with his exercises which do include handwriting practice and he tries so hard with his schoolwork I just think it’s no good asking him to write neatly as he just can’t .

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Emeraldshamrock · 19/01/2021 21:50

Yes mention it, it is not like the DC isn't aware of his shortcomings low confidence is also a big feature with dyspraxia. His writing may never get better DD has the same she is 12 she still struggles her fingers are hyper-mobile too.
The planning and processing that goes into their work is immense even if it looks threw together.
Be nice but firm ask them to focus on the positives let them know he suffers enough self criticism.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 21:52

@Emeraldshamrock

Yes mention it, it is not like the DC isn't aware of his shortcomings low confidence is also a big feature with dyspraxia. His writing may never get better DD has the same she is 12 she still struggles her fingers are hyper-mobile too. The planning and processing that goes into their work is immense even if it looks threw together.

Be nice but firm ask them to focus on the positives let them know he suffers enough self criticism.

Thanks that’s helpful , that’s exactly what I feel like. He knows his writing /presentation isn’t good and so doesn’t need to be reminded. It’s hard though as it’s a new school so don’t want to be seen as a complaining parent 😬

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lunklitdays · 19/01/2021 21:57

I'd definitely mention it, my eldest dd is almost 18, diagnosed with severe dyspraxia at 6. She also has hyper mobility in her hands.
Writing was an immense struggle for her when she was younger, so much so that she basically used a laptop throughout primary school. They encouraged her to write as much as she was able for but it was never made an issue that she couldn't.
It's not like they don't want to do nice writing they literally can't.

It must be very discouraging for your son, he's trying his very best. So yes I'd definitely mention it to them, you don't want him to start refusing to do it which is something my dd would have done.

As an aside now she's older she has built up the strength in her hands and can write as well and for as long as any teenager however most of her work is done on a laptop anyway now. She has great keyboard skills from learning so early!

BananaPie · 19/01/2021 22:00

It’s a hidden disability. If he had a visible disability (for example not able to use his hands) they wouldn’t be insisting on decent handwriting!

Can you explore other ways of enabling him to show what he can do? Snap type pro is a good way of photographing worksheets on a tablet then typing direct onto them.

Emeraldshamrock · 19/01/2021 22:02

Believe me I've been there, the teacher may not be aware of the anxiety that comes with dsypraxia thinking it is clumsiness.
You won't be that parent and it needs to be said, does your DS have a resource teacher.
I'd write a nice message to say thanks for the feedback DS is trying his hardest he is getting down with the negative comments with his online work, due to his disability be finds it difficult and overwhelming to see the big picture
I'm shit at explaining things but you bet my drift. Start the way you mean to go ones, long as you're polite there is no harm in protecting your DC confidence.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:03

@BananaPie

It’s a hidden disability. If he had a visible disability (for example not able to use his hands) they wouldn’t be insisting on decent handwriting!

Can you explore other ways of enabling him to show what he can do? Snap type pro is a good way of photographing worksheets on a tablet then typing direct onto them.

Thanks, that’s helpful, unfortunately the work they have commented on this week has had to be written in exercise book or drawn onto paper, they do sometimes have to type on computer slides which is easier for him so may be worth asking if can do more of that.

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Emeraldshamrock · 19/01/2021 22:04

You could be that parent print a mountain of evidence on how it effects him, contact the head, senco but you're not you are being reasonable and having a word.

Regularsizedrudy · 19/01/2021 22:04

He’s not being penalised, it’s just feedback. I’m sure they are all receiving similar comments.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:06

@Emeraldshamrock

You could be that parent print a mountain of evidence on how it effects him, contact the head, senco but you're not you are being reasonable and having a word.

😂, yes I think I will definitely bring it up. Just wanted to gather other peoples opinions as my husband thinks the comments are fine.

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drspouse · 19/01/2021 22:06

It's really disheartening. Can he type his work? We use SnapType to scan worksheets.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:07

@Regularsizedrudy

He’s not being penalised, it’s just feedback. I’m sure they are all receiving similar comments.

Maybe, but they may not all have dyspraxia

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Emeraldshamrock · 19/01/2021 22:07

Can you afford an OT assessment to advise for insisted technology. We only use it for big projects I want DD to keep trying even though it is hard.he should be due a review at some point every 2 years we had it mentioned at her review.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:09

@Emeraldshamrock

He has had a private ot assessment and that’s where he is receiving his weekly sessions, they haven’t mentioned anything like that but I can ask. Thank you

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Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:10

@drspouse

It's really disheartening. Can he type his work? We use SnapType to scan worksheets.

Thanks!

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Emeraldshamrock · 19/01/2021 22:11

He’s not being penalised, it’s just feedback. I’m sure they are all receiving similar comments
Teacher needs to take into consideration his ability and disability maybe praise efforts.

BananaPie · 19/01/2021 22:12

Has the school put an individual provision map in place? You could consider asking for one

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:13

@BananaPie

Has the school put an individual provision map in place? You could consider asking for one

I haven’t actually heard of that but I will look into it, thank you

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Frazzledbutcalm · 19/01/2021 22:15

Ds used kinesiotape on his hands due to hypermobility ... it made a huge difference to his pain levels.

Dd was eventually (year9!) given the use of a laptop. Made a huge difference to the work she could complete.

You definitely need to mention it to school ... and also OT - they could/should give you more help.

nanbread · 19/01/2021 22:17

How old is your son?

Mine is 8 with no diagnosis yet but really struggles with his writing, probably dyslexic, no one has picked him up on it since y1. They know he tries hard and can't write even vaguely neatly etc unless he writes very very slowly.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:19

@nanbread

How old is your son?

He is only 7. That’s good about your son, glad the school have been supportive.

OP posts:

BogRollBOGOF · 19/01/2021 22:20

DS doesn't get much on presentation (although I did politely raise it with school when a supply teacher made him rewrite work; his handwiting clearly is not NT, and I've seen her in action to know first hand that she's an absolute ignorant, inconsiderate cowbag to children with SENs)
His feedback tends to be about basic points of grammar/ punctuation/ developing letter formation (he has dyslexia too)

It's hard to tell, because tone matters. Expecting perfection is obviously unrealistic, and while progress is slow and hard-won, it does need some targeted feedback rather than being totally ignored.
Praising content and recognising effort is important.

deedeemegadoodoo · 19/01/2021 22:21

The teachers should be giving a target related to the topic and It focusing on the presentation. Speak to the SENCO and ask them to remind teachers.

Original poster

Newuser82 · 19/01/2021 22:24

Thanks for everyone’s insight, it’s useful to get other peoples perspective.

OP posts:

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