Refusing to homeschool

[SonicTheSorryRabbit]

Curious about this...

How many parents have simply decided that they're not doing homeschooling? Either because they're wfh and can't balance that with homeschooling or because it's too much for their kids and making them miserable?

If you're not homeschooling, (i) are you getting a hard time from the school?; and (ii) what are your kids doing instead?

YABU - we're homeschooling.

YANBU - we never started/we've given up.

[quote SonicTheSorryRabbit]@ReginaPhalangee. Interesting...what can you the school do about it if parents refuse to homeschool? Can you take them to court?[/quote]
We are currently involved in a process which is the last stop before courts for one family. To be fair, this has been an issue since September with this family, and coronavirus/wfh parents/homeschool pressures are not the reasons. But yes, ultimately there is a legal process to deal with families who will not provide education for their child/children. Schools engage, offer support,put plans in place, do all they can to encourage and help. But there's only so much they can do.

Think of it this way, many families scream over how hard it is to get a place in their school and move to be in the right catchment area. One of those highly sought places (or more, if a family) is being taken up but not used. And what about the legal duty to provide an education for your child, never mind the moral one. There does need to be an ultimate consequence.

But if you are struggling with what your school is providing, you will not be thrown to the courts. Your child will be classed as vulnerable due to loss of education, and will be offered a place, with a strong push for you to take it up and serious questions about why you would not if you also won't support education at home.

PLEASE don't get into that situation. Talk to your school, discuss options, come up with a compromise.

Sorry, meant to say will not immediately be sent to court.

@whittingtonmum

The consequence is a fine for non attendance and a visit/contact from EWO. Potentially leading to fine/prison sentence.

I don't know any school who wants to go down that line and the vast majority of people in education that I have contact with are against this. But it's not the school's decision. The government and Ofsted are demanding schools provide evidence that children are working/learning as if this wasn't all happening. As they aren't in school, that responsibility is passed to the parents.
Yes it's ridiculous, but it's currently the situation.

What if a parent cannot facilitate much or any home learning due to work pressures so the school offer a place, but the child cannot attend school due to shielding?

What practical support is actually available to those who cannot help their children with their home learning due to their own work commitments? I keep seeing 'tell the school, ask them for help' but what are they actually going to do to help resolve the issue?

If not being able to do home learning for whatever reason makes a child 'vunerable' (which is an incorrect use of the term) then I predict a huge rise in kids going back to school very soon

I have 2 DS engaging well with live lessons, I’m not making them do any extra even though it’s provided. Last lockdown one of them cried every single day, this time he’s happy.
My youngest DS is only 4 and isn’t engaging well at all, we do little bits here and there but broadly he’s playing on his own lots of the day.

We do all of it, even if it means doing it on a Saturday and Sunday as well (which it often does). Tbh we have nothing to do at the weekend anyway, so no big deal but it means I can take the pressure off mon-fri.
Our school just said do what you can. Focus on maths, phonics and English and forget everything else if you are struggling. That’s 90 mins a day for those 3 subjects (primary age). I think that’s doable even with a very reluctant child/work considerations etc.

My 4 year old isn't interested so I'm not going to force her. Plus I'm working from home anyway so it's impossible really! I can't take another 3 months of this though it's really got to me today!

We're doing our best. I'm aiming to get the maths and literacy done with her each day. I can't do more than I'm doing and doing too much makes her miserable so just hoping we're doing enough. I'm not being pushy though

Surely we are all working around this. The vast majority of people are still working and all in the same boat.

Just fit it in when you can surely. After work, before work, weekends...it does not need to be done 9-3.

I’ve seen so many parents in my child’s school moaning about working and having do homeschool. So are most of the country at the moment, nobody is having an easy time

@Dogsaresomucheasier

We are in the process of identifying kids in this category and getting them into school under the vulnerable category.

That’s interesting. Is that in England? What’s the process in Scotland. I’m a Keyworker, lone parent, but I work from home so no place at school for my child. But what, if I refused to homeschool she would suddenly get a place? Interesting...

I’m not going to do that of course. She will do the bare minimum of assigned work to her. But it’s curious that those of us who sought a place, would then get a space if we didn’t follow homeschooling out.

I know of at least 3 parents, that don't work, that aren't doing homeschooling and are very open that their kids just don't really feel like it.
I am and my 9 year old (Yr 5) is completing all lessons every day, which I help with as and when and I give it a quick look over before its submitted to be marked.
All while also doing uni coursework and from next week I'll also have a full timetable of lectures. We'll still be completing all work set even if it takes a bit longer (I really hope not!)

I try really hard not to be judgy but it's hard when one of them has said to me that they're purposely not doing it in the hope it will get their child a school place.
But mostly I feel bad for the kids. When they get back to school the curriculum will have moved on and they'll be struggling.

I said to one of these people that a lot of the time we live in a democracy. Ds and I discuss things and make decisions together (when it's appropriate).
With regards to schooling this is a dictatorship. It's non negotiable. Apparently I'm mean 🤷‍♀️

I work in a secondary school. Students who don't engage at all with home learning (ie not there for live registration, not handing in work set, not attending live lessons) are considered vulnerable and we actively try to get them in school.

Primary is a different kettle of fish though with much more demand on places. My son's primary has a single keyworker waitlist as they are full, and current single keyworkers will be bumped off if they get more double keyworker families needing places.

We would be over the moon if the school called and said because no work has been handed in he has to go in to school instead.

I am working flat out at the minute having to take my child with me to work and try and get him to do work it’s bloody hard. He hasn’t been on the 2 zoom calls they have daily and hasn’t handed any work in online. No one has phoned or messaged us to see if we are ok and why no work is being handed in.

My son is doing work but not what the school expect everyday as it’s literally impossible to get it all done.

We are not doing any.

We didn’t do any work during the first lockdown, dd just refused so we did our own thing. This time it’s different as school are doing live lessons (which she loves) so we are getting more done but still not doing all work. Dd has sn’s so could technically be in school but I chose to keep her home. I don’t push her to do all the work set because it can cause her a lot of stress to the point she self harms but we are getting a good amount done.

I have been struggling to do it and have told the school and they have been marvellous. My children are year 1 and year 4 and cannot seem to work independently for as long it it takes me to get a good lot of my own work done. I am a single parent and they only see their dad for two evenings a week. I cannot tell you how hard it is to try to homeschool two non-independent children of different ages, do my own work and do all the house stuff for three people stuck at home all day. For me it is just impossible. They are having morning class video calls and afternoon ones which I try to make sure they attend and then I do about 50% of the world with the 8 year old and 20% of the work with the 5 year old. Luckily the school are really understanding and say just do what you can. I have said to them I am worried about what happens when they go back and they might be behind and they said don't worry, they will all be at different levels and we will support them as best as possible. Thank goodness for the lovely school.

We are slowly going towards doing our own thing (which isn’t much) but mainly focusing on reading, phonics, playing games. Not putting pressure on my children this time. They didn’t fall behind before. Mental health is more important and it’s nice to have the time to enjoy other educational things.

What if the child is otherwise safe, cared for but just sat at home watching TV or playing in the garden because the parents are too busy to enforce homeschooling?
they don’t need to do everything at one go, they can start before your work , or after.
No benefit in sitting in front of TV.

It’s stressful but we get on with it. If there are no live lessons I set tasks, spelling and reading then a short break, and so one, we sometimes finish everything by 12, sometimes it takes so much longer , not before 4!.

I think each case would have to be considered individually. But ultimately, in this country it is law that children are given an education. You can’t just opt out. If you can’t manage it at home, then you should get a school place. I suspect that is one of the reasons there are more kids at school this time around. Parents know their limitations.

I feel like this is a thinly veiled attempt at highlighting why schools should be open but it’s really not working. Even full time workers could help their children at the weekend plus a few hours in the morning and evening. If that’s even required as there’s plenty from schools, Oak Academy and the BBC that’s available to help.

Shitty parents exist in every sphere and whether their kids are in school or not and luckily we do tend to have systems that help protect children.

If you can't support your children's learning during the typical 9-3 M-F, do it at other times. Both of my children require significant one to one support with learning, so we take any and all opportunity to do it - they were each doing work at the weekend and in the evenings at times as a result.

That's all fine unless, like my 7yo, your kids have a full timetable of live lessons which they are expected to attend and complete the work. This was the situation in lockdown 1 and many of my live lessons to my pupils were punctuated by wailing and sobbing from my own child trying to download kami or work a jamboard.

@LucyLockdown. No, I'm just interested in what happens if parents decide homeschooling really isn't working for their children and their family and so give it a miss.

Also wfh parents don't tend to finish at 5pm. If they're looking after multiple children during the day, their working hours tend to go into the early hours of the morning. There is no down time in the schedule for many.

I feel your op. Not doing great with it. School are expecting full days of learning and we can barely manage an hour. Some days we have done nothing. School are aware. My two have sen too. They just don’t respond to me trying to reach them.

You not your *