Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Be honest. Have you sent your kids to school when they could have stayed at home?

557 replies

Witchcraftandhokum · 19/01/2021 17:02

I left my job in education before Christmas mostly because of the governments appalling response to Covid in schools and anti-teacher sentiment generally so I haven't really got a vested interest. But I'm curious, after speaking to my ex-colleagues and friends who work in other schools there seems to be a dramatic take-up on the offer of places for vulnerable students and children of Key-workers compared to the last lockdown.

The numbers in my old school during the last lockdown made it hardly worth opening the school, this time they're at capacity and are having to bring extra staff in at a risk to themselves. In my friend's child's class there are 21 out of 32 currently attending.

What's going on?

OP posts:
QueenCuntyFlippers · 20/01/2021 22:34

Nope. I'm teaching full time in school so my 2 DC are in their school full time. DP works out of the home

kennycat · 20/01/2021 22:37

We havent. I actually resigned last week because I couldn’t do my new job while my young children were remote learning. As I was in my probation period I took the hard decision to resign rather than battle on or send the children into school. I know I am in a very fortunate position in that I had that choice.

studychick81 · 20/01/2021 22:41

@Almostslimjim

studychick81

So you would prefer an NHS worker quit than send their child to school, where they legally have a place?

Some of our admin cannot work with children present- they are making confidential and at times distressing telephone calls. Recording detailed, precise and extremely sensitive personal information. We have a list of workers (roles) who cannot have others in the room whilst they do their jobs, which includes children. The alternative is they are unable to work, or have to do their work in the hospital setting, which is a bigger risk. NHS can't be furloughed.

I very much doubt many people will quit their job because of having to home schooling for a few months. Most people won't be fortunate enough to be able to do that and it would be extremely short sighted. I imagine they would just muck in like most people.
ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 20/01/2021 22:42

A lot more parents are going in to work this time. A lot fewer are furloughed.

It's not sustainable to expect the same size class as last time.

Almostslimjim · 20/01/2021 22:45

But studychick81 the point is that lots of NHS can't "muck in" like everyone else. Their jobs preclude it, even if they can be done from home. Many have signed to say they can have total confidentiality in the home working set up.

caringcarer · 20/01/2021 22:47

DC has a HCP and a SW but was school categorically refused to let him attend during first lockdown. This time he is attending because his SW pushed it with his school. His school are discouraging all children with HCP from attending school and up until this week have offered very little by way of online learning. He is in Year 10 and if he had been getting his 4-5 hours a week online learning I would have agreed to keep him home but if school won't offer 4-5 hours each day online learning then he is going in to school. His personal circumstances means he has already missed a whole year of school when in Year 3 so really can't afford not to be learning.

Jabba2020 · 20/01/2021 22:49

I'm a lone parent and cannot work from home so my children are attending school. There are many parents who are working from home in financial or shipping roles who have openly said they have chosen to send their children in.
Apparently it's for their childs mental health or education rather than necessary for the parent to do their job.
It's unnecessarily putting people at risk and adding to the risk of genuine critical workers having to isolate.

studychick81 · 20/01/2021 22:52

@Almostslimjim

But studychick81 the point is that lots of NHS can't "muck in" like everyone else. Their jobs preclude it, even if they can be done from home. Many have signed to say they can have total confidentiality in the home working set up.
I don't remember anywhere in my posts saying that people who are working from home may not have a genuine reason to send kids into school!
indemMUND · 20/01/2021 23:03

Nope. Lone parent and able to deal with homeschooling with one child, I am very lucky to be able to do this, I know. DD's school has sent several emails out begging for people to decline places if they can because they are past their limits and having to turn people away. Today school sent out an email saying that there has been a positive case in her class, the bubble has burst and no kids allowed back in until after isolation period that ends 30th of Jan. So no kids in until 1st of Feb and class teacher will continue to upload online learning unless she falls ill. DD's teacher is brilliant. This isn't the first time parents have taken the piss sending kids in pending their own test results (positive, had to pull kid out midday). This time the child has been in for 3 days with symptoms before parents tested. Putting how many others at risk...

Shhimtryingtosleep · 20/01/2021 23:18

I work in a school. We're closed for the week so I'm homeschooling my 2 this week. I will only send them in if I have to. When I go back it will be no social distancing, hoping not to get sick and working full time as always :) It's impossible where I work but the distancing in my kids schools are great :)

Exhaustedpanda · 20/01/2021 23:52

My husband is a key worker but I am home so they are not going in to school. In fact we took them out a week early at Christmas because cases here were so high. There’s no way I would want to put them, their class mates or their teachers in any unnecessary risk.

paulhollywoodshairgel · 21/01/2021 00:10

My DH and I are both key workers. No option to work from home so 2 dc go to school the 3 days I'm at work and at home 2 days. I was told that I was really selfish for sending them though as my job within the NHS is 'only' admin. Yes, but I still have to go!! I can't just stay at home indefinitely

Wheresmykimchi · 21/01/2021 00:20

@paulhollywoodshairgel

My DH and I are both key workers. No option to work from home so 2 dc go to school the 3 days I'm at work and at home 2 days. I was told that I was really selfish for sending them though as my job within the NHS is 'only' admin. Yes, but I still have to go!! I can't just stay at home indefinitely
People seem to think we decide 🤣

The amount of my colleagues in the school who have had to send their own kids to their own schools , and are questioned....but kids aren't in?! Schools aren't open?!

No bother Susan, I'll let the headteacher know in the morning that we won't be going in ahain. She must not have realised. Hmm

Stinkywizzleteets · 21/01/2021 01:46

I left a chat group after more than one person admitted to lying to get their kids into school. One woman had planned a three tier approach so that if her husband wasn’t considered a keyworker (he wasn’t) then she was going to exaggerate her (undiagnosed) kid’s additional needs and disturbing behaviours and if they didn’t accept that then she was going to fake mental health problems to get labelled vulnerable- all because she didn’t want to do home schooling. I try to be understanding because I know how hellish it is being locked up with kids but I really struggle with how selfish some people are just to get some child free time. Teachers don’t need the additional crap from people like this. Nobody’s “me time” is more important than a teachers right to life.

Original poster
Witchcraftandhokum · 21/01/2021 05:38

Jellycatspyjamas My school (well before I left). All lessons on Teams, including a register and recorded. I can't imagine it being much different everywhere.

OP posts:
BumbleBeegu · 21/01/2021 06:56

Year 2 teacher here...last big lockdown in March I had 9/30 children in. This time I have 22/28 children in 🤷‍♀️ Which is just a normal class really...it's silly. I'm also still having to spend an extra 3 hours a day live on teams remote teaching...I start that at 8am, do an hours live maths lesson to those at home, then straight into my class at 9...spend my lunch hour teaching live English and setting the afternoon work. At 3.30 I log back into lives for another hour.

I'm exhausted...no breaks AT ALL all day. We have no extra staff in school as many of our TAs are off.

I love my kids, I really do...but I absolutely hate that this is happening, and I don't know how much longer I can go on like this. I'm working 7 days a week to organise the learning for in and out of school so that it works well. All our 'lives' are recorded and monitored by SLT and then put on Seesaw for those who didn't join the session. It's such a lot of pressure knowing these are recorded and put online...we've had NO training at all in our school on how to use this technology, and yet we are being highly scrutinised and judged. I'm just about done with it 😢

mellongoose · 21/01/2021 07:05

Lots of judgy posts here! I'm of the opinion that everyone can make the right decision for their own family.

Makes me sad to read this on a site for parent support. You judgy people will make people, who are already struggling, feel much, much worse.

We are using a place part time.

studychick81 · 21/01/2021 07:13

@mellongoose

Lots of judgy posts here! I'm of the opinion that everyone can make the right decision for their own family.

Makes me sad to read this on a site for parent support. You judgy people will make people, who are already struggling, feel much, much worse.

We are using a place part time.

Normally I would agree but unfortunately in this situation doing what's best for their family is doing what's worse for everyone else and their families. Increasing the risk for everyone else, possibly prolonging the need for schools to stay shut for everyone else. So no, they shouldn't be doing what's right for their family, they should be doing the right thing not the easiest thing. That's what they are doing- the easiest thing NOT the right thing. People are dying, we need to just muck in best we can.

I hope they do feel bad as that's what it boils down to. I wonder if someone gets sick/dies in their family or a close friend because of their decision if it will still be the right thing for their family? Because it hasn't directly affected them yet.

WunWun · 21/01/2021 07:13

@mellongoose

Lots of judgy posts here! I'm of the opinion that everyone can make the right decision for their own family.

Makes me sad to read this on a site for parent support. You judgy people will make people, who are already struggling, feel much, much worse.

We are using a place part time.

What are you talking about? This is about people abusing a system that's in place to save lives, for their own ends. Why on earth wouldn't people judge them?
SendHelp30 · 21/01/2021 07:24

“The right decision for their own family” might well kill a member of someone else’s family. But hey ho, at least they did what was right for them

Whiskas1Kittens · 21/01/2021 07:29

I could send my two youngest in but they are home. Their 20 year old university but at home brother has kindly said he will see that they are doing school work - and the 13 year old does need a kick up the bum. (20 year old also doing online learning). Basically dh and I go out to work leaving a house of teenagers. But they are generally sensible except for the odd complaint about lack of pizzas.

Amanduh · 21/01/2021 07:37

It’s happening a lot. Our school was so busy, large queues at the gates etc, but mums with babes in arms were dropping off school age kids as they had a one parent policy (husbands/partners were keyworkers.) They’ve had to tell people they can now only have a place if both parents are working out of the home and only on the days they work (eg one lady I know worked mon, tue and has a place for her kids mon-fri) and want proof. It was the only way. Numbers have dropped since

minisoksmakehardwork · 21/01/2021 07:37

Yes! DD1's school has said its all or nothing so when Dh has a rest day, she still has to go in but our primary dc's don't - they have sensibly said if an adult is home, they expect the kids to be home and they will still have their place when we need it. If dd1 doesn't go in, her school will withdraw the place she needs for when we are both at work.

I get that that need to be able to predict student numbers for staffing but I've told them I can tell them which days she can be home. Still got a 'no'.

I work in a school myself so I know the situation. But still think they're being shortsighted.

Jellycatspyjamas · 21/01/2021 07:49

Jellycatspyjamas My school (well before I left). All lessons on Teams, including a register and recorded. I can't imagine it being much different everywhere.

I know it doesn’t happen in my home local authority or the one I work in, because it places children at risk.

studychick81 · 21/01/2021 07:58

Why are schools saying they have to be in full time do you think? Strange when they are also reporting how full they are and many teachers aren't happy with the situation.