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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Spitting

68 replies

Panicking40609 · 15/01/2021 19:46

I know I’m not but I need to rant.

DP spits all the time especially when ever we are walking anywhere ie walking the dog. I complain about it all the time and he says he can’t help it but I have never once considered I needed to spit let alone in public.

I just think it’s awful manners, he’ll do it with other people around and I’m so embarrassed about it.

WIBU to push him in the lake next time he does it while we’re walking the dog?

OP posts:
Dobbyismyfavourite · 15/01/2021 20:22

Grim.

daisyjgrey · 15/01/2021 20:23

Deal breaker.

LakieLady · 15/01/2021 20:24

Spitting in public is bloody disgusting.

I'd LTB.

shrunkenhead · 15/01/2021 20:25

What is wrong with him?! Disgusting. LTB

oneglassandpuzzled · 15/01/2021 21:04

In some countries it is punishable with fines.

HopeYourHighHorseBucks · 15/01/2021 21:47

He is rotten. He can help it, I'm sure he doesn't just gob on the floor at work. I would be very embarrassed.

Voice0fReason · 15/01/2021 21:56

@IliveonCoffee

I mean its always asked.... but does he spit in the house??

Or at work - does he somehow hold this in indefinitely in meetings?

Disgusting, I've never understood the need for it. Especially when its combine with hoink!

It's a little different if something has got stuck in his mouth - like those little midges. But its always obvious who's a routine "spitter"" and someone who has unexpectedly found a visitor of the bug or hair variety.

This!!

Of course he can help it.

I bet there are some people he wouldn't do it in front of.

He is disgusting and he doesn't see why he shouldn't be.

Elouera · 15/01/2021 22:01

Is this a new thing, or has he done it since he met you?

Is he aware of how often he does it?
It is just when out, or at home also?
Does he have a post nasal drip or other medical disorder?
Did he have an incident in the past such as a swallowing disorder? Quinsy, glandular fever, severe tonsillitis?

There are cases where someone had a medical problem and needed to spit. This can then turn into an unconsious habit, which he may not be aware of, and continues to do so.

Absolutely revolting unless there is a medical history that lead to this? Cant he use a tissue? Equally, if he did have a trauma in the past which caused it to start, he should seek help to stop. (CBT, hypnotherapy etc)

ComDummings · 15/01/2021 22:04

I don’t know why some people do this, I’ve only ever needed to spit when we are out and about if a bug has flown into my gob while I’m chatting Grin anyway, it’s so gross, unnecessary and unhygienic.

ComDummings · 15/01/2021 22:04

If my DP did this I honestly wouldn’t be able to look at him in the same way

Original poster
Panicking40609 · 15/01/2021 22:26

Says in the house it’s not so bad because he can have a drink but like honestly it annoys me so much. He knows it and says ‘sorry’ sheepishly when he does it but it’s rude!

Obviously I can’t do a ‘LTB’ for just this as he in many other ways is a great partner, so maybe a push in the lake might do it.

OP posts:
Onlinedilema · 15/01/2021 22:28

Revolting.

Terracottasaur · 15/01/2021 22:29

That is profoundly disgusting

StripyHorse · 15/01/2021 22:32

@Panicking40609

Says in the house it’s not so bad because he can have a drink but like honestly it annoys me so much. He knows it and says ‘sorry’ sheepishly when he does it but it’s rude!

Obviously I can’t do a ‘LTB’ for just this as he in many other ways is a great partner, so maybe a push in the lake might do it.

He should take a water bottle out with him then so he can have a drink.

Or at least spit into a tissue.

OP, go ahead, push him into that lake.

Superstardjs · 15/01/2021 22:34

OP was it you who had the issue with a partner and your pets a while ago? If this is you and the same man, he is not a great partner. Apologies if you have not posted about him previously.

DdraigGoch · 15/01/2021 22:34

WIBU to push him in the lake next time he does it while we’re walking the dog?
Is it fair to pollute the lake? There must be a cess pit he can go in instead.

waitingforadulthood · 15/01/2021 22:36

And you have sex with him? After he lurgs and spits like a chavvy teen? Wtf?! My skin crawls for you

Doingtheboxerbeat · 16/01/2021 03:58

A guy did a giant honking globby spit whilst walking towards me , looked up , apologised smiling then proceeded to try and chat me up. He was not successful .

MrsLuciferMorningstar · 16/01/2021 04:12

🤮 🤮 So he’s one of those people that leaves little piles of spit on the ground for people to tread in and then walk into their car/home. Grim. That would personally put me right off.

Snackz · 16/01/2021 07:54

@Suzi888

Why do men feel the need to do this. Just that noise they make Envy= not envy.
It's definitely not just men. Plenty of women do it too Sad
Mumisnotmyonlyname · 16/01/2021 08:59

Some people believe it's a display of aggression.

Aprilx · 16/01/2021 09:02

@Panicking40609

Says in the house it’s not so bad because he can have a drink but like honestly it annoys me so much. He knows it and says ‘sorry’ sheepishly when he does it but it’s rude!

Obviously I can’t do a ‘LTB’ for just this as he in many other ways is a great partner, so maybe a push in the lake might do it.

I understand that perhaps you are too far in the relationship to end it over this. However in the early days, a few instances of this would have prevented merging any further. I could not be seen out with a disgusting person like this.
Aprilx · 16/01/2021 09:03
  • I can’t remember what I meant to write, but it wasn’t “merging”. Blush
Dogscanteatonions · 16/01/2021 09:18

An ex boyfriend spat in getting of me on the very early days of relationship. I stared at him said along the lines of 'that's absolutely disgusting do not do that EVER again.' he laughed a bit and I carried on staring with an extremely stern/disgusted look and he never did it again.

megletthesecond · 16/01/2021 09:21

I couldn't be with anyone who did this.

I've been known to call lads out for it and tell them to stop dribbling. It's foul.

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