Crazy plan to do masters/ surrogacy

[Falalalafishfingers]

To progress in my career I need to do another qualification which will take me up to the next level.
The course itself would be paid for by my employer but I would need to be a student for a year and wouldn't be eligible for a loan etc as it's a masters. It's not nursing either. This is what's put me off before as I'm the main breadwinner. Not sure if we'd get UC with my DP's whopping £22,000 salary.
I've also always wanted to be a surrogate to a childless couple, preferably with their egg/sperm. Could I combine the two? Do you get ML for being a surrogate?
My crazy plan is possibly could I have a baby and do the course on my maternity leave, where I would be on full pay? We have 2 DC's so I know I recover from pregnancy well.
I think the course would start slow so if I timed it right I could have lectures to work around rather than intensive placements in the early days.
Tell me this isn't going to work?

Obviously I wasn't wedded to this idea I was just sounding it out to see if it was completely barmy and it obviously was.
I still would like to be a surrogate, due to knowing friends who have struggled with infertility and haven't had money for IVF. It wouldn't be just for financial gain. I like the altruistic side of it more than being a womb for rent.
I continue to think of other ways to finance my lifestyle whilst studying. Third sector so no chance of being paid to study as well as the cost of the course, that would be grabby! Btw, they haven't paid for any of my mat leaves so I'm not trying to wring them for every penny!

@EileenGC thanks, that's good to know. I might have to go with that as I have no other option and it's not a vanity masters. It will help my future earnings massively, and hopefully help society too. Unlike my BA!

It wouldn't be just for financial gain what country are you in op?

So what is their suggestion of how you do the course they're offering to pay for?

I’m confident legally you’d be entitled to full maternity leave and pay in the same way you are with a stillborn.

The bigger question is the timing. As everyone on MN should know, relying on giving birth at the exact right moment to be on leave when your course starts is impossible. However you manage the insemination no technique is guaranteed.

@SleepingStandingUp U.K. I think they imagine I have a rich husband or work nights after my placements like other students.

The reality of this is totally different to what you are imagining

That's a crazy plan! Can you not do the master part time? I did an MBA part time and worked full time with 2 DCs, although lots of planning required! Good luck!

You dont even have a couple in mind. You just like the idea of handing over an actual baby to some random couple?

[quote Falalalafishfingers]@SleepingStandingUp U.K. I think they imagine I have a rich husband or work nights after my placements like other students.[/quote]
so you realise you can;t profit from surrogacy or use it to finance your other life choices right? it's reasonable expenses.

if you get the loan will you have to quit work to do your masters? where does that leave you employability wise?

no chance of being paid to study as well as the cost of the course, that would be grabby!

This makes no sense, OP - your employer says they'll pay for the course but won't allow you the time to actually take the course?

Is it intended to be studied while you continue to work? If so, it probably makes sense to talk to the course provider about how this would work in practice.

Do you rent or have a mortgage?
With two children and partner's salary of 22k, you may well be entitled to some Universal Credit.
It might be worth doing some hypothetical benefit calculations on Turn2Us and Entitledto.
Benefits when studying is complicated though, so it will probably be wise to contact Citizens Advice to ask.
The surrogacy plan is bonkers but I disagree with surrogacy anyway.

I say this in the most respectful way possible, grow up OP.

All pregnancies are different. What if you end up with HG, baby is premature, you end up distressed at the thought of giving baby up (yes, this can and does happen even if no genetic relationship).

You really think you can cope with 2DC, the degree, pregnancy, and dealing with the surrogate parents all at once? Also, I would never use a surrogate anyway but if I was choosing one I would not choose you. You aren’t wanting to do it for the right reasons and you would be essentially using the child to cheat the system.

To be honest I don't think the course is aimed at people like me, those with mortgages and dependents! I should have done it this year whilst it would have most likely been all online!

If I hadn't made it clear before then I've abandoned the surrogacy idea.
To be honest I often wonder how all these naysayers expect people to better their situations. MN is so down on those on benefits and sneer at the working poor and yet there is no way out. How is a lowly support worker ever suppose to better themselves if retraining is out of the question due to funding? It's almost like some people on MN just want people to stay on their pittance so they can suggest 'why don't you retrain?' everytime they moan that they're skint?

FYI Mumsnet is dead against any mention of surrogacy so all the opinions on here will be skewed.

That said, it is a crazy idea to try and combine the two.

Look into the 2 things separately instead.
Surrogacy is a wonderful thing

I work in the field and yes you would be entitled to SMP or Maternity Allowance in the same as a normal pregnancy.

I don't think it's necessarily a terrible idea. Like @notalwaysalondoner said your main problem is timing - there's no guarantee you'll get pregnant at the right time and it'll be a viable pregnancy.

There's also the possibility that it may not be a straightforward pregnancy. Can I ask how old you are OP? If you're under 30 maybe

Women are not vessels for hire. So-called altruistic surrogacy of privileged women just legitimises the abuse of poor and vulnerable women's bodies the world over.

Also, your plan is insane for about a million other reasons.

@CommunistLegoBloc women aren't vessels for hire... but one woman helping another woman to become a mother is just kindness. If I did it for my mate for example then it would just be an act of love. She wants to be a mother desperately but biology is strange. Why do I get to be a mother and she doesn't? It's not fair when rich people can have ten plus shots at IVF and she gets one.

Wouldn't it be fraud? To claim 'leave' when you were not in fact on leave?

Also, btw, surrogacy involves serious medical stuff - essentially you'd have your body put into menopause (stopping your cycle) so you could do IVF with their embryo. That is rough on your body. It could very well also mean you have a harder pregnancy and recovery than before.

How ridiculous, why would it be fraud?
I notice you put in your OP that you're hoping to claim Maternity Allowance. Is that becauae you wouldn't be employed and thus not entitled to statutory maternity pay? Are you aware that it's only £151.20 pw?
For all those feeling sorry for her employer, MA is paid by the DWP.

@Falalalafishfingers

If I hadn't made it clear before then I've abandoned the surrogacy idea. To be honest I often wonder how all these naysayers expect people to better their situations. MN is so down on those on benefits and sneer at the working poor and yet there is no way out. How is a lowly support worker ever suppose to better themselves if retraining is out of the question due to funding? It's almost like some people on MN just want people to stay on their pittance so they can suggest 'why don't you retrain?' everytime they moan that they're skint?

Oh grow up op.

People have questioned whether you can reasonably claim 12 month mat pay if you give the baby up and are expecting them to pay for your course

People have questioned surrogacy as a principle

People have suggested loans and suggested you talk to work who are willing to pay for you to do it so clearly must be willing to keep employing you. No one pays for a master's in the agree the person quits

You've made it clear the surrogacy was for financial gain and this latest tantrum shows that. How can the working poor improve their situation if they can't sell babies!!

You take the loan, you ask work about working part time or evenings/weekends and your get on with it.

Ideally with more maturity

[quote Falalalafishfingers]@EileenGC thanks, that's good to know. I might have to go with that as I have no other option and it's not a vanity masters. It will help my future earnings massively, and hopefully help society too. Unlike my BA![/quote]
not to mention inflate your maternity pay when you altruistically go down the surrogacy route

And yes on 22k you'd get tax credits and possibly hb

How ridiculous, why would it be fraud?

Because she'd be claiming she was on maternity leave while being enrolled on a university course. As I said. I don't know if it is fraud, but you know why I think it might be, because I asked the question.

This whole 'oh goodness why can't poor little me get ahead' act is a bit silly when you're trying to cheat the system. IMHO.

essentially you'd have your body put into menopause (stopping your cycle) so you could do IVF with their embryo. Possibly, though that's a needlessly dramatic way to put it, and possibly not.

I think trying to fit it in with a master's isn't ideal because practically it just won't work. Doing the master's the year after the birth might be more possible as you are likely to receive reasonable expenses, (which can include things like having a holiday after the birth). You could choose to save some of this for your future, to cushion a year without work- just like if you're pregnant for yourself, you can e.g. buy expensive maternity clothes, or just save that money and get cheaper things.

Being a surrogate altruistically is an incredible thing to do, with the right preparation and support.

Please don't be put off it simply because people on here, with no practical experience of the process or the ethics, are wanking on about it.