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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Refused me job ..aibu to feel like giving up?

252 replies

reddeadalive · 12/01/2021 14:46

I'm 33 and my job history is mainly customer service.
In the last 11 years my mum had cancer and has passed away in September.
I kept taking breaks in my employment to look after her.
My last job was 2016
I applied for a call centre and got offered the job.
Told them my previous history but couldn't remember exact dates.
They did a Experian employment check and refused the offer.
Saying there were too many gaps in my employment.
I feel really really low.
In a ideal world my mum wouldn't have been ill and I wouldn't have had to keep leaving jobs.
Will I ever get a job again ?

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 12/01/2021 20:07

@reddeadalive

I did claim carers but I really don't want to start having to show claim letters etc
You don't need to show them. It's for you to know exact dates.
PinkTonic · 12/01/2021 20:11

@reddeadalive

I did claim carers but I really don't want to start having to show claim letters etc
Why? Showing that you were claiming is seen as proof that you weren’t in jail or living on the proceeds of crime. Being defensive won’t help. You will need to account for gaps in employment.
WitchesGlove · 12/01/2021 20:14

@OllyBJolly

*I have 1 default off years ago now. What's next not getting a job in McDonald's if your late paying your credit card. I could understand if someone had been in jail for fraud but missed payments etc is a bit ridiculous*

How many years for the default? If it's more than 6 years it won't show.
I don't know if McD's do credit checks but in any job where you might be handling cash then it's a possibility that an employer may do a credit check. If someone can't manage their own finances then there is a risk they'll not be able to handle the customers' money.

Missing payments shows unreliability and lack of organisation. Red flag for some jobs.

LOL, I used to work with a Finance Manager that had previously been a gambling addict!

I dread to think what her credit history must have been like!

WitchesGlove · 12/01/2021 20:15

Definitely not all companies check, I’ve never had a check like that done on me.

Don’t let it put you off, OP.

WitchesGlove · 12/01/2021 20:19

Some people even have serious criminal records and they manage to get jobs!

Does anyone remember the programme ‘South Yorkshire Jobecentre’- they showed a woman in prison for drug trafficking and she was given a job working for the DWP as a job coach, WTF!?

I posted on another thread that this was unreasonable given that she would be working with vulnerable people, I was flamed and told she had ‘done her time’ and ‘deserved a second chance’ Hmm

SchrodingersImmigrant · 12/01/2021 20:24

@WitchesGlove

Some people even have serious criminal records and they manage to get jobs!

Does anyone remember the programme ‘South Yorkshire Jobecentre’- they showed a woman in prison for drug trafficking and she was given a job working for the DWP as a job coach, WTF!?

I posted on another thread that this was unreasonable given that she would be working with vulnerable people, I was flamed and told she had ‘done her time’ and ‘deserved a second chance’ Hmm

That's... That's actually concerning. She did her time but she is still someone the traffickers know and can use to target vulnerable people. That's... Concerning
reddeadalive · 12/01/2021 21:32

Thanks everyone for all your advice
Just sat and did a updated CV on indeed with dates of caring etc
Applied for a couple of positions through indeed
Feeling a bit more positive
There seems to be loads of customer service jobs around so I'm literally applying for the lot.

OP posts:
Sparklfairy · 12/01/2021 22:28

@reddeadalive

Thanks everyone for all your advice Just sat and did a updated CV on indeed with dates of caring etc Applied for a couple of positions through indeed Feeling a bit more positive There seems to be loads of customer service jobs around so I'm literally applying for the lot.
I'm so pleased you're feeling more positive Smile Job hunting can be brutal and a knock back like you had can be soul destroying Flowers keep your head up
ConquestEmpireHungerPlague · 13/01/2021 00:54

Yes, but it is now, because employees have more rights, and employers more responsibility.

lol, they really don't!

PrankedByLife · 13/01/2021 01:51

Hi OP, I became desperate a few months ago and applied for a call centre job for HSBC, the recruitment process was via Reed. I got the job and had a start date. I was given an online portal to log my work history. I've been a contractor for many years, so had a lot of jobs to state for those 5 years. I filled out the portal and realised it didn't allow me to quite cover the 5 years, it was short by 2 months. So, I rang them and told them, they said it was fine. I also emailed and gave them the missing data. I also uploaded my CV stating all the dates including the missing 2 months. They then withdrew my job offer saying I was dishonest. I told them to look at the uploaded CV, the email, that I declared those missing months immediately, way before they bothered to check. However, apparently I was the dishonest one because it wasn't in their portal, the very portal that wouldn't let me input the full 5 year history in!! These people are stupid that read a script. Candidates for call centre and low jobs are ten a penny. They are not going to waste a second of their time to look into any issues. From my experience higher paid jobs have a more human touch in terms of HR and give you a chance to discuss any discrepancies, maybe they feel a higher job candidate is with the time?! (Although, my last professional job was an awful experience, the HR element was not).

PrankedByLife · 13/01/2021 01:52

*worth the time

Newyearohdear · 13/01/2021 07:26

OP have you tried going on the freelance sites (Toptal,fiverr, upwork)etc and getting a Virtual Assistant or CS position? The pay isn’t always amazing but it’s recent, relevant experience and you will be learning new skills. If it’s under 16 hours you can still get benefits.

vanillandhoney · 13/01/2021 08:35

@ConquestEmpireHungerPlague

Yes, but it is now, because employees have more rights, and employers more responsibility.

lol, they really don't!

Of course they do 🙄

Sick pay, maternity leave, annual leave, contracts, compassionate leave, pay if you're injured on the job, rights if you've worked somewhere longer than two years....

Or do you think none of that is a right for an employee and a responsibility for an employer?

OllyBJolly · 13/01/2021 09:54

@ConquestEmpireHungerPlague. In my first Personnel role (before it was called HR!) back in the late 70s it was my job to call previous employers and ask about why people were off sick, if they were slackers, if they were union members, did they have a good attitude, and also the compulsory question "are they militant at all?" Multi-national non unionised petrochemical company. It was also quite usual to ask women about plans to marry and have children. (And I was asked this up until the 90s)

None of that would be allowed today - quite rightly.

reddeadalive · 13/01/2021 15:23

I applied for 4 jobs last night and not heard anything back.
All through pertemps.
How long do you think before I write it off as not interested?

OP posts:
Sparklfairy · 13/01/2021 16:46

If you only applied last night I would wait a few days, especially with unemployment the way it is right now they're probably swamped.

Best approach (for my sanity) I found was to 'send and forget', but keep sending. So send it off, and straight off hunting for the next one to apply for.

LIZS · 13/01/2021 16:56

Ds often does not hear back at all, or perhaps a receipt email then nothing more. Rejections are usually to the effect of "thanks but we had 200/300/1000 + applicants many of whom had more relevant experience ..."

Puzzledandpissedoff · 13/01/2021 17:15

Candidates for call centre and low jobs are ten a penny. They are not going to waste a second of their time to look into any issues

Sadly this is very true, though IME it can be more about the number of likely applicants than the actual money

I'd be a very rich woman if I had a fiver for every applicant who insisted they'd really learned from their driving ban, bankruptcy, criminal conviction or whatever, and what they all forget is that there are usually plenty to choose from who don't have these things

At least, though, nobody ever went without a courteous response to their application, even if they weren't successful; I just hate it when that happens

ConquestEmpireHungerPlague · 13/01/2021 17:23

Sick pay, maternity leave, annual leave, contracts, compassionate leave, pay if you're injured on the job, rights if you've worked somewhere longer than two years....

It's as if you think none of that existed in the eighties - just to clarify, I am talking about the 1980s, not the 1880s! It's true as the pp says that there was a lot of sexism in the workplace back in the day, although as far as I can see there's plenty of that still - it's less than five years since the case where someone was sacked for not wearing high heels and makeup for a receptionist job, for example. What we certainly do have now is a wholesale erosion of workers' rights, for example a rolling back of unfair and constructive dismissal legislation, increased probation and notice periods, widespread deunionisation, and of course the rise of the zero hours contract. Additionally, technology enables surveillance and audit of employee activity like never before.

This is why couriers sling parcels on to your doorstep hours after the tracking said they had already been delivered, for instance, because they're expected to complete an insane amount of work in an unrealistic time frame, but if they don't (pretend to) meet closely scrutinised microtargets they don't get paid. If they're off sick they don't get paid. If they go on holiday they don't get paid. If there's no work for them because, say, flights are grounded, as in the first lockdown, and parcels are stuck in transit, they don't get paid - that's what zero hours means. This is how millions of employees in the UK are treated. As a pp mentioned, all these types of mcjobs - call centres, supermarkets, mail order fulfilment, etc - expect to keep tabs on how long you spend in the loo. Packers in mail order warehouses are expected to strip off and change into overalls in CCTV surveilled changing rooms to minimise theft ffs. Let's not even get into agricultural jobs, cleaning jobs, catering and hospitality jobs. All of this for minimum wage or less.

If this is your idea of progress, you have Stockholm syndrome. More likely, you just have no idea about employment conditions beyond your own little sector.

Anyway, as I said before, none of this helps the OP, who imo has been shoddily treated by the employer in question, however reasonable and responsible you may think their actions.

I hope your current crop of applications bears fruit, OP. I'm going to leave your thread now as I feel my contributions are just enabling others to derail it, sorry.

OllyBJolly · 13/01/2021 19:27

One of the most patronising posts I've read, @ConquestEmpireHungerPlague

reddeadalive · 13/01/2021 19:58

I honestly think my gap in employment is going to be trouble for me.
If there is 1000 applicants and 10 of them have good work history /no gaps
They will obviously employ those

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 13/01/2021 20:00

You just had a job offer and lost it on technicality. Obviously you are employable then.
Just keep applying

Puzzledandpissedoff · 13/01/2021 20:20

If there is 1000 applicants and 10 of them have good work history /no gaps
They will obviously employ those

Only in principle, OP; I've known many with what seemed to be good work records who were complete no-nos for other reasons, some of which I mentioned above

Like so much else it's a balance, and since you're clearly employable I expect it's just a matter of getting your CV sorted and sticking with it until the right one for you comes along

Livingtothefull · 13/01/2021 20:31

Just keep applying for jobs OP, just apply for more don't wait to hear back from the ones you applied for. Don't let yourself get disheartened....you WILL get something in the end but it can take time and a lot of applications.

blueshoes · 13/01/2021 22:09

@reddeadalive

I applied for 4 jobs last night and not heard anything back. All through pertemps. How long do you think before I write it off as not interested?
OP, just keep sending it out. Don't wait before sending the next lot. Realistically, you are not going to be the first choice in most vacancies but you will get lucky at some point and be called up for an interview, just like you were for this call centre job.

Now you have all your dates, you sound organised and can explain about the caring responsibilities and you would like the opportunity to prove yourself. I think many people, once you are in front of them and see the sincerity (not desperation, though) and how positive and enthusiastic you are, will want to give you a chance.

Having done interviews as an employer for positions where candidates have no experience or very little relevant experience, personality counts. Also interviewers have off days so sometimes a candidate interviews on a day who has good experience but for some reason does not make the cut. A candidate who interviews on another day manages to crack a joke and there is some chemistry but no experience - that candidate gets the offer. That candidate will be you one day, even if there are better CVs with no gaps out there.

Hang in there, OP. Send those applications out and one or more will eventually bite.

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