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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this was oversensitive?

81 replies

LemonSherbetFancies · 09/01/2021 15:00

I do feel pretty happy right now. Mainly because I have a great relationship with my DP, we have all bonded more as a family, he has kept his job and it's done better than ever business wise and we have (God willing) all stayed healthy.
Of course we miss all our social events and seeing all our friends and extended family but we do feel happy. I put a post on FB saying yesterday night saying "Feeling very happy." and got a few nasty responses asking how could I be when the economy is in ruins, people are dying and kids education is being wrecked.
Aibu to say that it really is something when people are criticised for trying to make the best of a bad situation?

OP posts:
Imiss2019 · 09/01/2021 15:41

@MrsGrindah

And now you are probably not going to like the responses on here either!
Probably updating Facebook status as we speak with sad pensive emoji 😔
JillofTrades · 09/01/2021 15:43

Read the room.

And honestly if you were really happy then you wouldn't need validation from Facebook friends.

SuperHighway · 09/01/2021 15:43

Why did you feel it necessary to post your emotional state? Had somebody asked you how you were feeling? Glad I don't do FB, it's full of attention seekers.

Ideasplease322 · 09/01/2021 15:45

Fine that you are happy, but I never understand why people post this stuff on Facebook?

It’s like the #livingmybestlife stuff. I just find it all odd. If people are truly happy, why do they feel the need to take the time to post it on the internet?

Would you send Everyone in your an address book a text to say you are happy.

Again nothing wrong with being happy, it’s lovely. But where does this impulse come from that your every emotion needs to be put on social media?

SchrodingersImmigrant · 09/01/2021 15:51

Some people just like to share. Nothing wrong with that🙄

But the delivery here was more attention seeking than just happy little sharing.

Butchyrestingface · 09/01/2021 15:54

In many ways, 2020 was a really good year for me. I'm not a prolific Facebooker but I have occasionally posted when I've had good news. Ie, "Butchy is excited because... it's house moving day." . . There may have been people who couldn't summon up enough energy to congratulate me or even thought that I shouldn't be posting but I didn't have a single negative comment. Presumably because I gave some context.

If I saw someone post "xxx is very happy" with zero context I'd be more than a bit Hmm. I'd feel that was a very attention seeking post at the best of times and that the poster was gagging for people to ask, "oh why, hun?" But in the current circumstances, it's really out-of-touch and hardly surprising you attracted negative comments. I probably wouldn't have said anything, but just unfollowed you.

Bluntness100 · 09/01/2021 15:56

I also can’t imagine why you felt the need to post this at this time. That’s very odd behaviour.

Sure if something greats happened, like new job, new house, wedding, child etc, but just general “I’m very happy” is just an odd thing to post in the middle of a pandemic.

MrsXx4 · 09/01/2021 16:03

Childish and cringe to have to update your status. You’re attention seeking and if you are actually as happy as you say you’d not even think about having to announce it on socials so I’d personally be thinking you’re not actually happy and trying to convince yourself that you are.

Butterymuffin · 09/01/2021 16:12

Aibu to say that it really is something when people are criticised for trying to make the best of a bad situation

But that's not what you were doing - for you it's a good situation, your partner's business is doing really well, you've had more family time etc. You didn't mention any downsides or making the best of things. So I'm afraid then it does just come across as a bit 'I'm all right Jack'.

haloalkane · 09/01/2021 16:14

Bully for you, sis. We love people profiting out of a pandemic

Cocomarine · 09/01/2021 16:19

Fine to be happy, fine to share that and why. My fb feee is FULL of positive posts from friends - today a 50th, a snow angel, the mist over the fields this morning, a looooong bike ride and a beautifully decorated cake.

But nobody is posting “feeling happy” PM-me-hun-style 🤷🏻‍♀️

Save it for a gratitude journal.

Cocomarine · 09/01/2021 16:21

And you’re hardly “making the best of a bad situation” are you? It’s all pretty OK for you 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m genuinely interested in why you posted attention seeking shite like that? And as I said - I love a good actual positive fb post from my friends!

roarfeckingroarr · 09/01/2021 16:23

They are over sensitive but you are oversharing

burnoutbabe · 09/01/2021 16:23

I posted yesterday I was happy to finish my exams. Pretty much all my friends liked it.

Not sure I'd just post I was happy as then everyone would wonder why (pregnant?Etc)

PurpleDaisies · 09/01/2021 16:25

Was that literally all you posted?

Boulshired · 09/01/2021 16:33

I see Facebook like texting, would you text your contacts with “I’m really happy” with no other context then why would you post it on Facebook. But equally I only have a few good friends on Facebook so it all very amicable.

ktp100 · 09/01/2021 16:35

YANBU to be happy with your lot.

YAB a bit U putting it on Facebook - a bit more awareness needed at the moment, I think.

I would also argue that most people would find posts like that without a global pandemic and the whole ensuing shower of shit. It's just a bit, well, wanky? For want of a better word!

ktp100 · 09/01/2021 16:37

Annoying - I meant would find posts like that annoying even without the pandemic.

There's just no need.

palmstar · 09/01/2021 16:45

Read the room.
Are you really that dense?

Iheartsheep · 09/01/2021 16:51

I had the time of my life during lockdown 1. Dh furloughed, me at home on full pay not working for 3 months, dc at home with barely any school work to do. We walked daily, explored new places,
played in the paddling pool in the garden, had bbqs, drank wine all day. We made a photobook of all the lovely things we did together to remind the special times always. Did I put this on social media to rub it in to my friend's who perhaps were not having such a great time? No I did not. Yanbu to feel happy and content yabu to brag about it.

StElsewhere · 09/01/2021 16:52

In a room full of blind people would you walk in and announce, "I feel great! My vision is 20/20 and I LOVE it"? Maybe you would.

Why do you feel the need to announce how well you're getting on when other people in your circle might be struggling financially, losing jobs, losing loved ones even. It's just insensitive at best. An empathy bypass at worst.

1forAll74 · 09/01/2021 16:55

Why do you have to put things on Facebook, can't you just be privately happy. You should know quite well, that some people will post something odd or rubbish as a reply.

MrsGrindah · 09/01/2021 17:02

@StElsewhere

In a room full of blind people would you walk in and announce, "I feel great! My vision is 20/20 and I LOVE it"? Maybe you would.

Why do you feel the need to announce how well you're getting on when other people in your circle might be struggling financially, losing jobs, losing loved ones even. It's just insensitive at best. An empathy bypass at worst.

Excellent point
imalmosthere · 09/01/2021 17:07

Oh god, vaguebook much? Begging for attention. Why brag in a time where the world is in ruins. You're entitled to feel happy, but YABVU to plaster it online. Even more unreasonable to not see why it makes you sound like a bellend.

Tal45 · 09/01/2021 17:12

In RL would you going round to people saying 'I'm very happy' with no context or explanation? It's just weird and attention seeking. It's fine to be content with your lot, but why the need to tell everyone? You just sound a bit smug.

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