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AIBU?

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Original poster

WIBU to say something to neighbour (Parking thread)

78 replies

ColdandFrosty1 · 09/01/2021 13:18

Red house is my neighbours house and black is mine. Our parking spacea are number 3 and the other spaces belong to others

So I really dont want to say anything to my neighbour as we've both only just moved in to our respective houses but where he is parking his car is really starting to become a nuisance!

His house is at a right angle to mine and we both have 3 parking spaces infront of our houses, 1 which belong to us and 2 which are rented out to other people. However hes parking his car on the side of his house which is making it really difficult for me to reverse or even drive foward into my parking space without nearly hitting another car, bearing in mind I also have parking camera's but its still so hard!

I work long shifts and when I come back at night its dark which makes it harder to park and its also alot of noise and lights trying to park which could wake the other neighbours.

He's seen me struggle to park a few times now and not done anything or said anything to help the situation. I'm not a very confrontational person and want to be on good terms with my neighbours.

YNBU: Say something and ask if he can park in his own space

YABU: Ignore him and let him park where he wants.

WIBU to say something to neighbour (Parking thread)
OP posts:
Original poster
ColdandFrosty1 · 09/01/2021 15:11

He never uses his own space no and I'm pretty sure there is only one car that I've ever seen. He also has a garage

OP posts:
doodleZ1 · 09/01/2021 15:13

Yes parking space 1 and 2 does belong to someone else but I would do it anyway. If a neighbour asks you to move I would explain why you were there. If idiot came and asked you to move I would say you are in my reversing space, it's not a parking space. Why dont you want to say if the idiot uses his own space?

doodleZ1 · 09/01/2021 15:14

Any idea why he wont use his own space, that's odd.

Original poster
ColdandFrosty1 · 09/01/2021 15:20

I think because its right infront of his front door, same as mine

OP posts:
MzHz · 09/01/2021 15:27

You have to go round and speak to him.

HE doesn’t know you’re a scaredy-cat

So don’t look like one.

“Neighbour, I’ve noticed you park opposite our parking space and not in you own. It makes parking difficult for me and I could end up damaging our cars trying to get past. Please can you park in your space from now on so that I can use mine, thanks”

WhereverIGoddamnLike · 09/01/2021 16:16

@ColdandFrosty1

I dont mean park there. Just pull up there, jump out the car and knock on his door then tell him he will need to move as he has parked behind your drive in the maneuvering space. Then run back and jump in your car and wait for him to move his, then you can drive into your space. Dont attempt to park in your space, just pull up and go and get him. Every single time, no matter what time it is. Dont get into a discussion with him; just "you've parked across my space again, you'll need to come move so I can get in".

If he parks back in that space, then you go and get him up again so you can get out. Keep doing it.

You need to grow a back bone. I know you're saying that you're shy, buy he is in the wrong. That area is for you to manoeuvre. You bought your house knowing you had space for that. I mean this as nice as possible; grow up and deal with it.

Lurkingforawhile · 09/01/2021 16:22

I think that's a great idea @WhereverIGoddamnLike. And it means it will feel more natural rather than having to go round, knock on the door and have the conversation when the OP is parked in the space. And he might just say she parked there fine so what's the issue. Very strange he doesn't use his own space.

Pugdoglife · 09/01/2021 16:30

Could you park in his spare if you get home late and it's dark? (You shouldn't have to but it might be easier). I would knock on his door and ask him to move his car because it's blocking your parking space and then mention where he should be parking, even though you say he's seen you struggle he genuinely might not know it's a problem.
I know you say you're anxious talking to him but the parking is causing you anxiety too, so it's worth sorting out sooner rather than later.

SwanShaped · 09/01/2021 16:31

Yep that’s really annoying. Defo speak to him.

RandomMess · 09/01/2021 16:31

You need to approach it with a, that isn't a parking space because it impacts on the ability of me using my allocated space, it's causing me a massive inconvenience and if that had been a designated space we wouldn't have bought our house. We all need to use the allocated spaces.

The other thing is to start parking in a way that makes it very difficult to manoeuvre into the area where he is parking.

Pugdoglife · 09/01/2021 16:31

space not spare

BackforGood · 09/01/2021 17:04

If he is blocking you in, then knock on his door at 5am every time and get him to move it.
However from the way you've described it, it doesn't sound like he is blocking you in, as you are getting on and off the drive. In which case it is a bit annoying, but he isn't really doing anything he isn't allowed to, by parking on a space that is a communal space.

doodleZ1 · 09/01/2021 17:27

It's a reversing space not a communal I do as I like space. Park behind him see if the other neighbours agree when they are hemmed in that's it's a communal space. We can all do as we like that's what folk like this neighbour forget. He does what he likes, so can you. Hem him in and keep doing it. Act as daft as him. Some neighbours can be plain selfish with absolutely no common sense.

peak2021 · 09/01/2021 18:55

You have to speak to him. Not wanting to cause much noise at night when you return is a reasonable ground.

Hankunamatata · 09/01/2021 21:21

Knock the door everytime with a polite excuse me can you move your car .

AiryFairyMum · 10/01/2021 13:19

Another vote to knock and explain - maybe he doesn't realise.

Summersun2020 · 10/01/2021 13:47

I wouldn’t ask if there’s a reason why he isn’t parking in his space. Because it doesn’t matter if there’s a reason-his reasons aren’t your problem and it’s creating an issue for you. Don’t give him an excuse to argue back with a reason why he can’t!

lifestooshort123 · 10/01/2021 14:20

Put a note through his door as suggested upthread. 'Hi, I'm Mary from no. 7. Could you please leave your car in one of your parking spaces instead of in the turning space as it makes it difficult for me to get my car in and out. Thank you!'

Original poster
ColdandFrosty1 · 11/01/2021 11:58

Hi everyone! Good news I didn't have to go around myself, I bumped into him this morning after he was taking his dogs for a walk. He asked me if he was blocking me in when I reversed and I said it was just a awkward when I'm trying to reverse in at night or early mornings. He did apologise and said he saw the previous neighbours did it so automatically started doing it too as he didn't realise it was a problem. He said he'll make sure he's in his space in future. Im so glad I didn't have to approach him but I think the lesson I've learnt from this thread is to basically grow a pair if I want to make my life easier 😅

OP posts:
lifestooshort123 · 11/01/2021 12:08

That was a result and well done for looking to change - one day you might need to have difficult conversations re school etc but they don't have to be confrontational.

Calmandmeasured1 · 11/01/2021 12:09

Yeah! Result!

WhereverIGoddamnLike · 11/01/2021 13:50

It sounds as though if you had gone to speak to him then he would have been very understanding. Sometimes people are, sometimes they are not. But if you can't even bring yourself to speak up then you never find out and just have to carry on living with whatever the problem is

Original poster
ColdandFrosty1 · 11/01/2021 16:28

@WhereverIGoddamnLike

It sounds as though if you had gone to speak to him then he would have been very understanding. Sometimes people are, sometimes they are not. But if you can't even bring yourself to speak up then you never find out and just have to carry on living with whatever the problem is
I was going to bring myself to speak up, alot of people on this thread were giving me support and tips on how to do it. Its really not as easy for some people as others may think. I would love to get over my crippling shyness and social anxiety and bring myself to do it Grin
OP posts:
Funnyface1 · 11/01/2021 22:37

Hmmm.

Sinful8 · 11/01/2021 22:40

@Orlania

Tell him that you're not a very good driver and you wouldn't like to hit his car. And it's likely you will. Whilst smiling sweetly.
When people say things like this I can only think they're children.

You understand in the adult world thats not even marginaly a threat?

"Oooo you do as I say or I'm gonna fuck my car and insurnace up and cost myself lots of money!!!"

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