how is homeschooling going, just had a cry and abandoned it

[coffeelover3]

so ds is in year 7 and every day they start at 9am and work until 3pm, with a teams meeting where work is set, and then they have to photograph it and upload it. it's just getting me down - there's been lots of tears - it's a huge amount of work, and I'm wfh as well - have done very little this week, and what I've done has been in the evenings or after 3 when 'school' is over. I hate having to nag him to do it. Plus its quite complicated, the teachers all seem to use teams differently - some set up a meeting and have folders for the school work - others put links to the work in the chat and you have to email them the work, others use sharepoint, others use 'go for schools' to put the work onto. Plus they are setting homework. I cant bring myself to "make" him do the homework atm, but I suppose we will have to tackle it over the weekend. I'm going to be catching up on emails and work stuff over the weekend too. I feel like I'm constantly working, cooking, printing stuff out, helping ds - he is not very independent, I'm trying to work on that, but he needs me to sit with him and help explain what he has to do. I'm so worn out, and it's only a week in. How am I going to sustain it. I know millions of us are in the same boat, just looking for others and how they're managing. I feel so mean making him sit at the table for 6 hours a day - tbh we haven't done everything. Yesterday he was told to make 9 posters for music - 9!!!!! In the end I roped in dd, and we did 3 each and uploaded them. It's unrealistic...? And so boring - every lesson is 'watch this video then do the work sheets'. HOw are others coping, feel like I@m cracking up. And work due to get busy next week. something has to 'give'.

stovetopespresso i'm a bit wary of next week when we go to live lessons and to filling in sheets directly online instead of 'having to print them off'. I can foresee trouble ...

@Walkswithbitches so sorry to hear this, hope your husband shows some understanding and you get your life back on track after this shi*tstorm

@Laiste omg yes i can see that's also potentially difficult, at least printing them off means no one has to see the kid leaping around and fidgeting, or chanting "no.no. no" whilst farting which hapened a lot today

Ds1 age 10 - his granny has taken over his work and is coming every morning to do his work with him (she has been furlough)
Ds2 age 8 - SEN so doing what we can though a lot of work being sent. Me and DH still working so trying to squeeze some work into our evenings too. Feel like i never get a second to myself

I am a teacher ans in my school (secondary academy) there is pressure to do live lessons and plenty of work because in summer lockdown parents complained of too little.
If I had school age children now I would ignore the bollocks snd just get them to READ lots. Loads of stiff on Kindle Unlimited for 7.99 per month.

This is so hard to manage for parents AND for schools. This time round, the DfE has prioritised remote learning over everything else and the Education Secretary has already told parents to complain to Ofsted if their blended learning isn't good enough (the implication being that there should be lots of it). The pressure is on to 'make' children do their work or be held to account. It's cold, it's dark , the news is deeply depressing, people are anxious and everyone is doing the best they can. I hate that poor government strategy is pitting schools and parents against each other.

I would concentrate on English, maths and science and the lessons that are important to your son. Is he interested in music? Might he do it at GCSE? If the answers no then don't let him spend any more than the allotted time on it and if he has other more important (to him) subjects to catch up on then just do one quick poster and concentrate on other things.

I hate it. Lockdown 1 we did some educational stuff, but it was BBC bitesize and watch a gazillion documentaries type of stuff. Worked wonders on DD2 who was having difficulties at school (didn't talk to her teachers for over a year after a shit teacher caused her to lose confidence, lockdown gave her breathing space, and her fab teacher this year clicked with her).

She's Y5 and neds a lot of support with the learning materials. She's acing the IT stuff and uploading/downloading documents and photos. Next week she will be printing her materials and taking and uploading photos by herself. I'll still and to assist her with every exercise and my self-employed online sole trader stuff will slip further behind.

Y7 DD1 will start having online Teams video lessons and the teacher can take over motivating her and answering all the questions. Thank fuck.

Home schooling was never an option I wanted to take up. It's got to be done and will hopefully resolve itself (I think Easter) and fingers crossed next winter will be better. For now I feel like a shit, shouty, stressed parent who's also shit at self employment.

Erm, you do all know that 9-3 is how much work children do when at school?

And the teachers do know your children and will deliver what's required.

A few tasks for a few subjects a day, plus homework should be manageable.

As for those of you deciding what's valuable to set or not; you're at pains to point out that you're not qualified teachers, so why do you think you know this? A poster might well demonstrate a child's understanding of a topic, or make them think about how to convey their ideas or opinions to others. A video might explain and demonstrate something new in an engaging way.

There's no real evidence of what the best remote teaching looks like, so live learning isn't necessarily better than pre-recorded. And teachers are not all required to run their classes and their routines in the same way and different subjects lend themselves to different processes.

How about you just let your kids try? Maybe they won't be as perfect as if you do it for them (!) It'll be good for them to do their best and achieve something.

Woolf do you live in the real world - have you ever had to get an 11 year old (or younger!) to sit at the kitchen table for 6 hours with a 15 min break and a half hour break, and continuously write and fill in the worksheets and make posters? There may be 6 hours of school but there are distractions, other children to talk to, practical things to do P.E. etc etc. etc. Plus their parents are not their teachers?

Erm, you do all know that 9-3 is how much work children do when at school?

Patronising, much?!

Sure, by different specialist teachers, who know their stuff, and who don't teach for six hours straight.

I have a BSc and a BA, I still struggle to explain grammar, mathematical concepts, and other lesson tasks, to my DD, because it's been a long time since I studied these, or I haven't studied the subject material at all.

Actually, teachers do teach for those hours straight and some are still doing in class and remotelyat the same time. And they're dealing with making over thirty children sit and do some work, not just one. The 'distractions' you think are helpful are anything but; they're draining and time consuming.

Some of the previous posts have complained about adults' work being interrupted. That's what teachers are dealing with all day long, because your kid fancies a break what what they're being asked to do for their own benefit.

This isn't something being foisted upon them or you. Just let them have a go.

You don't need to actively teach them anything. The information should be there, in the way the teacher judges best, and the kids need to get on with practising it.

to every working parent having to deal with this. I have a 5 month old and return to work next month with childcare sorted. It’s not been fun for us but I couldn’t imagine juggling schooling and work and I would never even have considered it a possibility let alone achieve it. You are not alone however, do not think you are failing your kids, everything you do will be helping them through this. Stay strong xxx

@Woolff

Even teachers get breaks and gaps between lessons, surely?!

And they're dealing with making over thirty children sit and do some work, not just one. The 'distractions' you think are helpful are anything but; they're draining and time consuming.

I have, no doubt, this is very true. I know my DD is more productive without these interruptions and finds them distracting, indeed.

However, this thread isn't an attack on teachers. Nor do most people feel home-learning has been 'foisted upon' them. At least, I don't. But I have one child who is, mostly, compliant with learning so I have it easier than many others in this respect and the workload set by my DD's school is manageable, for the most part.

The OP is talking about her struggles with her child and home-learning, in her situation, she isn't criticising teachers.

DS has dyslexia. His first lesson of the week was meant to take 45 minutes. It took us an hour and a half. We've soldiered on, and got maybe half of what he was supposed to do done. Because of his dyslexia, I can't leave him to it. I have to be there.

Then I have to do my day job. (Thank god I worked my arse off in the run up to Christmas and got a couple of big, high profile projects finished so I have brownie points in the bank with my manager.)

I can't fault the teachers - the online lessons are for the most part superb: well thought out, engaging, great for getting students from the basics to a quite sophisticated level.

But it's incredibly hard and tiring for both of us (I assume it is every bit as tiring and hard for DS's teachers).

And yes I did make the unilateral decision of "screw drama and PHSE, life's too short.

So, Woolf, please believe that I mean this from the absolute bottom of my heart: fuck off to the far side of fuck and when you get there fuck off some more.

Maybe what I have to say sounds very harsh, but I genuinely mean just let the kids, who you think are finding it a lot or difficult, try.

They probably manage each day without anyone hovering over them and making a challenge seem impossible.

School timetables really are that full on, and no, teachers don't have the breaks you think. Where I work, and especially at the moment, everyone does duty at break (fifteen minutes between lesson 2 and 3) and lunch (twenty five minutes between lesson 4 and 5). If it's raining, the students stay in their bubble classroom then too, so form time, lessons and 'breaks' really do add up to sitting there for six hours straight. And you'll find they when different teachers run from one bubble to the next to teach their subjects, they'll a expect the work uploaded to classrooms, or wherever, in their own organised way. The students really do manage to locate the work, do it and hand it in!

@CaraDuneRedux meant to take 45 minutes. It took us an hour and a half. We've soldiered on, and got maybe half of what he was supposed to do done. Because of his dyslexia, I can't leave him to it. I have to be there.

You're not there when he's at school.

Presumably he has dyslexia then, too, and lesson times aren't doubled just for him.

You can bet that noone is one to one, with every child with dyslexia, all day every day.

So maybe actually listen to what I said, act with his best interests rather than making him a victim, and let him do his best at the work set in the time given, before thinking the best response is to tell meto fuck off.

You might be on the wrong thread Woolff. This is for people finding this strssful and shit. Who, with the thrown together resources that we have (with ALL, and I man ALL, due respect for teachers this is a PITA situation for us all, teachers included. I am stunned by the work that has been put together. The teachers finding resources, making their own videos, giving feedback nearly instantly to submitted work - with no more time in the day to put this together is truly appreciated by me.

But my day is still hard and I get to be a bit fd up with it. I get to have a headache because my already busy life, being self-employed, is being affected by needing to support my children in their learning. Because they can't access it by themselves. It's not in a format that could work. I say that as a undergraduate and graduate student of the Open University well used to self motivated/self learning and the way that is built up. So many parents are in-loco-teacherist at the moment with no experience or teaching experience.

So while I wouldn't tell you to fuck off, I would suggest that you leave parnts having a hard time to sympathise/empathise with each other and not be so arrogant as to tell us our lived experience isn't valid.

Apologies if any 'e' is missing in my spelling. Key is sticking and my earnings are down. Was going to get a new laptop but will be paying for better broadband for the education of my DDs first.

ah woolf you're just a wind-up aren't you.

I'm and adult and struggle to "do work" for 6 hours straight without talking to anyone. Maybe when I was studying for exams and cramming I could just about do it, but that would be 'active' study.

And no it's totally different at home. The worksheets are handed out. The teacher has the video ready to watch on the whiteboard. Every lesson I spend at least 20 minutes trying to locate the files - then either print them out, or else ds copies it out onto a page - by which time he's too fed up to do the actual 'work'.

I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your kitchen table. You either have extremely biddable academic children, or...

And being a teacher, whilst being an incredibly demanding job, is not a bit the same as getting your kid to sit still at home.

It's like doing homework for 6 hours a day. Nightmare.

@ToffeePennie

My dd5 is in reception and goes to school 3 days (both nhs workers)
The 2 days we have her at home on our days off we also have the 2 year old on the rampage so we do PE/ dance mat then some reading when DS2 snoozes

Anything else would be impossible x

I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your kitchen table. You either have extremely biddable academic children, or...

I doubt that Woolf actually has children.

It's a bit like the hypothetical children who sleep through, nap to schedule, potty train by 18 months, never have a tantrum - the sort we all had in our heads during our first pregnancy before reality kicked in.

Still, by the end of this year DS will have lost a year of school that he will never catch up on because of his learning difficulty. But apparently that's my fault for "teaching him to be a victim."

(In fact I have spent the last 7 years since his diagnosis saying "you can do it, yes maybe it will take you longer and you'll have to worker harder but you can do it." Now he's being fucked over by circumstances completely beyond our control. But apparently I'm not allowed to be upset about that.)

@Woolff
Whilst I get what you are saying, some children require their parents to sit with them and/or hover because they don't have the same dynamic with parents as they do with their teachers. For instance, I can tell my DD to go online and get on with her work (I'd be required to explain the instructions and anything she doesn't understand) but she sure as hell would NOT get on with her work as she would for her teachers unless I supervised or sat with her.
She will moan, she will fidget, she will get up because she needs the toilet, needs a drink, needs to run to the bedroom to get a pillow to sit on, get a pen (even though she has five in front of her), get her teddies, you name it! It's funny and bloody stressful at the same time but what should take 20 minutes (for instance, homework) might take over an hour. Next week, she starts lessons on MS Teams. That'll be interesting..

You work in a school so you likely know what it's like having to work with children who won't study or concentrate without you supervising but imagine trying to get on with your normal job workload at the same time. Plus with the added complication of not knowing the subject matter and not fully understanding what the teacher wants (and who is not there to explain) thrown in.
It's easy to say just leave the children to get on with it themselves but many don't and something has to give.

Dc is in Y8 and we set a timer for 45 mins per lesson. She does as much as she can then moves about for 15 minutes before starting the next lesson. I spoke to her form tutor who was totally find and said as long as dc was engaging and doing something they were happy. Find what works for you and then chat to the school is my advice.

Expecting kids to do 5 hours study every day at home is madness. They need to deduct all the time they usually spend faffing about in school. Getting people settled, handing stuff out, telling kids off, moving from one room to another etc etc.

@CuckooSings

Dc is in Y8 and we set a timer for 45 mins per lesson. She does as much as she can then moves about for 15 minutes before starting the next lesson. I spoke to her form tutor who was totally find and said as long as dc was engaging and doing something they were happy. Find what works for you and then chat to the school is my advice.

I like this idea a lot!