What recourse do I have for school refusing to give “vulnerable child” place to DC with ASD (but no EHCP)

[Fr0thandBubble]

DS1 has autism and is struggling to access online learning. He struggles with concentration and executive functioning and finds it very hard/impossible to work independently at home. Both DH and I have full time jobs and have very limited time to sit with him and help him.

We have therefore asked his school for a place as a “vulnerable child”, on the basis that he is having difficulty engaging with remote education (one of the stated grounds). They have said no as they already have 18 key worker children and children with EHCPs in his year who have places in school (my DS does not have an EHCP but does have an official diagnosis of autism and is registered with the local authority’s children centre and CAMHS). 18 is a lot less than his usual class size of 30.

I’ve just had a huge row with his SENCO and made it clear that I consider that they are failing their legal obligation to educate him but what the hell can I actually do to make them give him a place? I know this isn’t an AIBU but posting for traffic - if anyone has any advice it would be very much appreciated.

In my school they children who are in are doing exactly the same work as those at home
Those in school are not getting anything more than those at home
They are just sitting in the hall doing it not at home doing it.
So if a child isn't engaging at home they won't engage at school either I doubt !

So work with school to ensure the provision being sent home is suitable, ask for some 1-1 sessions via teams or similar. Ask school for copies of what they are using to support him so you can carry it on.

Don’t abuse the SENCO for simply trying to do her job

Yabu.
Every child in the country is not getting their normal education
The school key worker provision and special needs provision is broadly for supervision only.. you child might be supervised by teaching assistants especially if teachers have to isolate or see to their own emergency situations. There probably is no real quality teaching going on anyway in schools.
It’s not the end of the world if your child doesn’t get a full 9-3 timetable of learning at home.
My husband is a long distance lorry driver and I work from home and have to concentrate on my own work during those hours. my youngest has no special needs but is too young to self learn and concentrate. We muddle through by filling in the gaps in evening and weekends. Last night we did an online reading exercise at 9pm at night! We are all affected in ways like this

Your child could access the education on offer if YOU supported him, but YOU don’t want to. That is why he can’t access what is on offer because YOU won’t facilitate it. Take some responsibility

@TableFlowerss

Unless you’ve got a child with SEN I don’t think you can call the OP entitled at all!!

I have a child with SEN, because he is clinically vulnerable he can’t go into school.

It’s a nightmare situation all around. I still think the OP is being unreasonable.

@lemonsandlimes123

The sense of entitlement from the OP is truly astonishing. Such a shame that she and her husband place their own needs and wants first and put their child into second place, no wonder the poor kid is struggling.

This is so nasty and ignorant. The OP’s child is struggling because they have a neurodevelopmental disorder that means they find disruption to their routines incredibly distressing.

My child has my full attention (along with his younger sister) all his waking hours. He’s still pulling out his own hair and scratching his arms until they bleed because he’s fucking autistic and the current situation is unbearable for him.

@FamilyOfAliens

I pay my taxes (way, way more than my fair share)

What does this even mean?

It's the mantra of the permanently entitled.

@Snowbeau DH is self-employed and has clients that pay upfront so he is contractually obliged to provide the services for which they have already paid. He has to do the work unless he wants to open himself up to being sued for breach of contract. His income has already been slashed to about 20% of what it was in 2019. He is a sole trader and there is no one else who can do the work. What are we meant to do? I get that it’s hard for everyone but it’s ten times harder for the family of a child with special needs.

My firm isn’t furloughing and it is a pretty cut-throat sector. If I don’t do the work, I am fairly confident I will end up being managed out. As the main breadwinner for a child with special needs whose future earning capacity is very much unknown, I am not going to jeopardise my job, because there is a good chance I am going to have to support DS financially throughout his adult life

Why you? Why can't your DH do something to help seeing as your the main breadwinner.

He doesn't qualify. Even kids who qualify schools are having to prioritise. There is no obligation.

All of my child's ehcp provision is in place. There are 3 ehcps with 1-1s in her year and all have their provision in place. The rest of the kids are split between a teacher and HLTA.

Mrsfrumble - read the OPs own description of the difficulties her child is having. It is not comparable o your child unless of course you are suggesting that all children with autism are the same, which as you well know is not remotely true.

@RainbowRaine see above - I think our posts crossed.

I think you will struggle to get a place and it sounds like your DS may struggle to access the new structure at school. It certainly won’t be a ‘normal’ school day.

They should be sending home suitably differentiated work though!

In what way do you pay way way more than your fair share of tax?

We’re high earners and pay our fair share - that’s what proportional taxation means.

I’m afraid your view of your own contribution does make you sound very entitled.

[quote Fr0thandBubble]@AldiAisleofCrap Not technically true. The government is ultimately responsible for my child’s education as a matter of law - and your children’s too.

I could maybe try to get unpaid leave from my job but it will very likely write off any chance of promotion and my firm has an “up or out” policy - if you don’t get promoted to partner, you are managed out.

As the parent of a child with special needs, I cannot jeopardise my job. Because of my child’s special needs, I doubt very much that he will ever be able to hold down a job himself. I need to be able to support him financially on an indefinite basis.

I pay my taxes (way, way more than my fair share) - I should be entitled to an education for my disabled child without having to lose my job in the process.[/quote]
I am a parent of a disabled child too, his disability is physical and relates to a rare health condition. But it is a hidden disability, so I understand how everything can feel like a battle.

But you are coming off badly here. Paying higher rate tax doesn’t somehow qualify you for special treatment over those who pay in less. That’s not how it works.

I pay higher rate tax too, but I’m sure it hasn’t even touched the costs of the five operations my son has had in the three years he was born, alongside the two months he spent in NICU.

@TableFlowerss

Unless you’ve got a child with SEN I don’t think you can call the OP entitled at all!!

I have a disabled toddler who has been stuck at home since March due to being vulnerable to Covid.

I think OP is entitled, am I allowed an opinion?

My children have echp. They are not being taught. Their 1:1 are sitting with them and they are doing the work that has been set by the teacher online for the pupils at home. No more than that

@Mrsfrumble

But OP hasn’t described this kind of emotional behaviour for her child. So He is not suffering in this way
She is merely demanding education that she perceives other children to be receiving because she hasn’t the time to facilitate the learning being sent home

Fair enough, the tax comment was stupid and irrelevant.

You sound entitled...wanting your son to have a education. It’s not like it’s law or anything.

Oh, wait!

Yes, we get that having a child with additional needs is harder but there are ways around it.

Working in early mornings, evenings. Setting a film up and then doing things like checking emails if the child needs supervision.

Have you really really thought through the impact of what you're saying?

You want to send a child with ASD into an environment that usually is structured, is highly routined, has social norms about it. I'm making assumptions from how you've spoken that his needs are high due to what you've said about his future. How will he cope with a school that doesn't offer the same structure, routine, social norms that he is used to? How will he cope without his friends there? With a teacher he doesn't know? What will the meltdowns be like when he gets home because his world is totally different at school to what he expects? How will this be easier if you're then dealing with the fallout?

I get it. I really do. It is hard to juggle work and home schooling. I think you need to sit with the fact school have said no and not look for recourse at all. They are doing their best. I can promise you that.

You really, really, really need to change your mindset too if an ehcp if perhaps on the horizon. Your senco will be golden for you securing this if you can work together. If you complain, moan, shout....Well, it probably won't be as plain sailing.

@blubberyboo DS has been in tears both yesterday and today - completely out of character. However hard this transition is for a neurotypical child, trust me, it is much, much harder for a child with autism.

what the hell can I actually do to make them give him a place?

You can't make them, and I get that it's frustrating for you, but there is no legal right here. It's at their discretion, so having a row with the SENDCO isn't going to help.

It's crap it really is, but these are extreme times and your child isn't unsafe at home, with you like some other vulnerable children who are effectively in because their home lives are unsafe.

@heartlantern2 but education IS being provided at home, so that argument is a moot point.