Key worker? Genuinely confused now Aibu and not realising it?!

[BestJamInTheVillage]

I’ve been offered a place for my twins year 1 to go to school starting tomorrow.
My husband works in transport and is out of the home- I work for the council dealing with vulnerable people. Part of that is safeguarding and domestic abuse situations. I am working from home but the nature of the work is very delicate and I’m
Either on the phone or in virtual meetings with other professionals and service users.
Some people on the mums WhatsApp group have made pointed comments about ‘if you can work from home you shouldn’t be using a space’ etc but i don’t think I’m being unreasonable sending kids in.
I can’t have them running playing whilst I’m doing this work, obviously family can’t help out and I’d be forced to put the kids in front of their iPads etc for entertainment.
The WhatsApp guilt is making feel shitty

I think given the nature of your work then you should definitely take the place. I can see why people are peeved though, as there will be other jobs where confidentiality is important and they will just have to deal with it as they arent identified as a Critical worker. That's the way the cookie crumbles though.

Send them in.

But family can help out (childcare bubbles are still allowed)

Some people are hard of thinking, OP. Don't feel guilty.

@Igglepigglesgrubbyblanket we are in exactly same position. Both F/T. DC has v mild SEN but no EHCP. On the basis of what HE means currently - 60+ hours per week, and a whole load of pastoral, and DC mental health, when school offered a place we have said yes.

Take the place and don't feel guilty. You need to give attention to vulnerable clients in same way a GP working from home does. A child interrupting or overhearing is not appropriate. People may not feel comfortable speaking if a child is there.

I'm a key worker and am sending mine even though I work partly at home. I do a lot of work with families facing children being removed into care and DD's best friend is a looked after child. I don't want DD overhearing something inappropriate which she might repeat to her friend, and it would be deeply unfair to those I work with if my own child suddenly pops up on a screen or is audible in the background

I think many people haven't considered that it's not just about whether you are physically present at home.

The more kids that go in, the longer this lockdown will last. The overriding duty is to stay at home. I expect all parents to do everything they can to keep their kids at home.

Most of us don’t have jobs that are compatible with homeschooling, we just have to get on with it and risk being sacked for doing a bad job/work all evening to make up for it. It needs to be as short a lockdown as possible. Classes with 50% “key” workers is wrong.

mute or leave the whatsapp group

I'm jealous op. I am working from home and would send my kids in if I could but I can't because I aren't a key worker. Ignore them and send them in!

Of course you're entitled to the place and of course you should use it. I would be really careful about comments like 'I’d be forced to put the kids in front of their iPads etc for entertainment', though - that's exactly what lots of non-keyworker parents will be forced to do, and just as you've been made to feel shitty about whether you 'need' the place, they almost certainly feel pretty shitty and guilty about having to juggle WFH and their children. It doesn't make it ok, but people do have a tendency to lash out when they feel like that.

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis glad your school offered you a place. DS has SEN but also no EHCP (yet) and are refusing him a place.

@Jangle33 tell that to government employers then, who insist every last one of us is a critical worker and not eligible for furlough....

The way I think about it is it doesn't matter if a child gate crashed my meeting. (cultural sector). Not sure if feel the same if I had a consultant appointment or social work appointment and this happened.

Also one way or another home schooling does impact on the time you can spend on your job. Again this doesn't matter for non essential jobs. No one's health or safety is compromised I'd I work less hours. If you work less vulnerable people go without vital support. As someone said in a different thread the place at school is actually to support your clients. Yanbu it is not the same as any home working job.

You are a critical worker OP, your work is such that you would not want your child or any other to hear what is being discussed. If you were not doing your job then people would be at risk.

Please tell them that they have no idea what you deal with and you will not discuss it with them but they can rest assured you are most definitely a critical worker. Then tell them to jog on.

Look after yourself OP. I do a similar job and am utterly wrung out after a day talking to clients. Fortunately just other adults wfh in the house with me, I wouldn’t be a fit parent or worker with 5 year olds around.

I've a similar job but dd is old enough to understand if I tell her not to interupt me or come in the room and can get herself snacks etc. The thought of trying to do it with younger children gives me the fear as so much of it would not be appropriate for her to overhear.

Agree totally fine. I work in safeguarding and there was no provision last time so I had to stand at the end of the garden to make phone calls. Had multiple suicidal teenager calls including having to call the police for young adults in immediate danger all with a 3 and 6 year old. I have taken the keyworker spaces offered straight away this time

The bottom line is most people's jobs are important, if it wasn't it wouldn't still be happening.
Everyone is at risk of being sacked for making mistakes. Some could be sued of negligence for making mistakes.

Parents are being asked to do the impossible work and look after young kids at the same time. That's before you throw in the pressure of Homeschooling.

People should be grateful England is at least allowing nurseries to open. Preschoolers cannot be well looked after by a wfh parent without venturing into what would be classed as neglect.

Also as someone who does a similar job I am often working with extremely vulnerable women whose children may no longer be living with them.
They certainly don’t need to have their time with a worker interrupted by a child - that could be so triggering.
Please use the space.

Schools sadly have to deal with sensitive safeguarding issues all the time, and they know only too well it would be impossible to do your work effectively with small children under your supervision. They probably wouldn't want to deal with someone in your position who was liable to be distracted, for a start. Ignore the carping.

@Iknowwhatudidlastsummer

You follow the rules, you are doing nothing wrong

The rules SHOULD be that parents WFH keep their children, and places only offered to critical workers working out of the house.

My local schools even accept children when the other parent is a SAH parent...

It's just makes for bigger "bubbles", more risks of the entire group being sent into isolation, and less help for children who are staying home. Some parents try to do the right thing and keep theirs, leaving a spot for those who REALLY need it. Others don't care.

As long as the rules allow you, go for it.

So a GP may be able to do phone appointments from home, but by your reckoning because they can do it at home, rather than sitting in the surgery, the rules should be that they should also look after their children and not send them to school.

@ChablisandCrisps my employer isn’t using furlough, just redundancies.

Mute and concentrate on your clients 🐱

The WhatsApp guilt is making feel shitty

Dump the people making you feel shitty. Jealous people just want to drag every down to the lowest common denominator and are not the type of people you want in your life.

Mute the WhatsApp group and send your children in.