I've resigned, manager wants it secret, I don't

[NoOneCaresInRealLife]

Exactly that really, I've resigned from my job end day was 31st December '20 but due to the nature of the business I've agreed to stay until 31st January '21 to help with transition. My manager has been calling people into the board room and telling them individually that I'm leaving and telling them not to tell anyone!
I am happy that I am leaving but this 'cloak and dagger' telling people has really annoyed me. I am part of the senior management team and in my opinion an email should have been sent out detailing my end date. I am quite angry about this stupidness
AIBU -

So everybody will know but they're all being told not to tell anybody1?!?

That is so stupid.

I would send out your own email on the 15th January or thereabouts, to say everything you want to say.

That is a compromise. Two weeks of pushing it underground as per manager's request and then when it's leaked out anyway, two weeks of you being allowed to say goodbye.

So everyone knows but they’re not allowed to discuss it? Bizarre!

My workplace is like this. We call it secret squirrel. It’s actually quite pathetic really.

I wonder if he's secretly spinning it as you being sacked, given that you aren't moving to another job?

This happened in my last job. The head of IT did 4 months' notice in secret. The MD thought people would "panic" because they didn't yet have a replacement lined up but nobody would have given a shit!

This happened to me too, but in a different context. I wasn’t management and the company had a very high turnover of staff, which led to all resignations being hush-hush. Smacked of desperation and only added to the intrigue when yet another employee left.

I feel like a mug when I think about it. The MD told people individually, so I kept getting people sidling up to me to let me know they were in on the big secret. Robbed me of being able to share the news myself, and given how I’d disliked the job it was something to savour!

I should have just ignored, and I think if you can’t get your place to put out a communication soon you should do the same.

Sounds like a (fruitless) damage limitation exercise to me.

This has happened to me twice before when I’ve left somewhat toxic work environments. They are possibly worried your departure will be infectious and everyone will start fleeing. That rarely happens even when a workplace is toxic as there are so many other factors that keep people where they are. But it’s likely a worry they have.

Also, without knowing your industry, would it worry clients or suppliers that a senior manager was leaving? Sometimes it suggests discord/issues at management level and they might be trying to contain the news to avoid speculation...?

Add a line in red to your signature "Advance notice that my last day at x company will be x/x/x."

Job done

@glitterfarts

Add a line in red to your signature "Advance notice that my last day at x company will be x/x/x."

Job done

Except that I'd add "I am resigning and..." Otherwise they still might think you've been sacked.

I've had this in the past, when I left my last role my manager didn't want me to tell anyone either. I told him that I'd already told friends in the company and DP and I had dinner with a couple of people (also employees) over the weekend (pre-CV) and we'd told them already so the news was out. But this doesn't help you now.

One of my friends in the same situation as you sent her boss an email saying "As several people are now coming up to me and openly asking if I am leaving, I'm going ahead and letting people know myself as it's obviously no longer a secret".

You are leaving, what are they going to do if you tell people.
Tell the manager to shuv it and tell who you like.
So glad you are leaving to be with your family.

I can’t see what the problem is personally. This happens in most places with more senior level posts, leaving announcements are choreographed to ensure everyone who needs to know is not blind-sided by a formal announcement. With Christmas and Covid chaos, no doubt 1to1 conversations have taken longer than expected.

Make sure your direct reports team know before the formal announcement, your boss is ensuring the senior team are aware too - I suspect they need to make some decisions about covering your role so this can be included in the announcement.
All perfectly normal.

OP,
What you tell colleagues about your choice to leave the job is absolutely not the business of your manager.

I would openly inform people and if your boss mentions it tell them it is not their decision to make.

Any bullshit and tell them you can leave immediately.

But tell people you are leaving.

You should not allow them to control you like this.

They are not concerned about you.

Take back control.

The key here is to refer to what the employment contract says, really.

If it says nothing, then there's not much that can be done.

However, I've seem contracts that do prevent an employee from discussing conversations with management (including reasons for resigning) which would prevent an employee telling colleagues their reasons for leaving. I'm not aware of any being taken as far as a tribunal, but that's because they wern't breached.

In once case the clause was to prevent a customer knowing the exact status of key staff on a big project.

Why all the secrecy? Could you departure crash the share price??!!

I once worked in a job where I resigned whilst on maternity leave. The management team kept telling everyone I was coming back and that I was on an extended career break, so that when people queried the shortage of staff the blame was laid at my door instead of theirs. Meanwhile I was merrily working away in my new job for about a year before they finally admitted that I had left. It was weirdly bonkers.

This happened to me in a toxic workplace.... they didn’t want clients to find out.
However after I left I found out they had shared details I wouldn’t have disclosed myself (think left for a substantial pay rise) and made some incorrect assumptions about my health which I was quite angry about. They want to control the narrative - it’s your narrative to control though!

I’d just send out my own ‘loved working with you, all the best for the future email’.

What are they going to do about it

Weird
This happened in a place I worked in - everyone knew but no one talked about it in front of the boss
People talk. I’d bet everyone already knows
I’d just mention it in passing now after all Whats the worst that could happen

You’re hardly likely to get fired

Sounds like you've been made to leave. Otherwise why the secrecy. Bet your colleagues think something dodgy has gone on.

They are wanting to control the narrative, possibly for legitimate reasons, as @SilverBirchWithout mentions, but this DOES run the risk of it looking like you have been ‘asked to leave’ or sacked... I’ve worked in places where employees ‘disappear’ and are then gossiped about

As you are planning to exit the workforce and therefore may need these contacts to get a job in future I think it’s important to make your own narrative. If you are leaving to take care of family responsibilities certainly talk loudly and openly about how much you are looking forward to that

Something similar ish happened to me

I gave very long notice and was inexplicably told not to tell anyone till management were ready, which turned out to be a week before.

A lot of people were pissed off at the "short notice" so I ended up telling the truth, that Id not been allowed to tell them. i still don't know why it was done that way but many people felt let down.

Sorry OP there may be no reason other than someone's whim.

No , share prices won't be affected.
Yes, I am the main contact for all departments.
I deal with and negotiate purchasing for my department externally and have an excellent relationship with all my suppliers.
My manager described my going as a bereavement and needed time to mourn.
They had an opportunity to stop me leaving but they never followed through on their promise knowing that my professionalism and commitment would keep me.

I'm going to bring it up in meeting tomorrow am and relay that I will be making a formal announcement at noon.
Yes, take back control indeed.

Someone in my industry was fired for appalling misconduct which was reasonably widely known. They took co trip by issuing their own press notice in the name of the organisation to the trade mags. The public story was therefore a warm send off, and given they were fired, what was the organisation going to do anyway? Absolutely audacious. Quite evil genius.