Aibu to send toddler to nursery in tier 4 when I could keep her at home?

[Plmoknijb123]

As above. I have a place part time just for her socialisation etc but am now second guessing myself as I could keep her at home. She is 20 months and desperate for stimulation so I think for her development it’s worth the COVID risk. Keen to hear what others think...

Nurseries are doing a lot to keep everyone safe. So long as you haven't potentially put her at risk over xmas (and could pass it to staff and other babies) and you have nobody vulnerable she is in contact with then there is no harm in her going. Children gain a lot from being in social contact with others.

I personally would put health over stimulation as you can provide that yourself. All my instincts would be to protect her and others. You have no idea if everyone else has been socialising over the break, followed the rules etc.

Personally I think 20 months is a little young to need nursery so I probably wouldn’t. Might be different if she was 3 or 4.

I'm not sending mine back for another couple of weeks. Them going just expands our contacts to a point that I'm not comfortable with. Better keep them home and safe for now.

I have a just 2-year-old with a part-time nursery place, also in Tier 4. We won't be sending him in for the next month or so. We're lucky we can keep him at home so I'd rather help the nursery out by keeping attendee numbers down and, as I'm a teacher, helping not spread anything I may catch from being at work and pass on to DS.

@IceCreamAndCandyfloss

I personally would put health over stimulation as you can provide that yourself. All my instincts would be to protect her and others. You have no idea if everyone else has been socialising over the break, followed the rules etc.

This. Especially when she's as young as she is and really doesn't NEED to be there. You can provide plenty stimulation at home. My daughter didn't go to preschool until she was 3.5 and she's been perfectly fine.

Our HV was really insisting that DD need to go to nursery. Shes 14months. She is really nervous around other babies so I do worry about her. If they close schools round here I might take her out of nursery

Health over stimulation. She is 20months so nursery isn't necessary at all. That's a lovely age though, there's alot that you can do with her.

I'm sending my 2 year old. My DD is at primary school, so my DS will be exposed to whatever germs she brings home. I disagree with pp that you can provide the same quality of stimulation and socialization at home. You can't.

It's not an easy choice, and I think every family might weigh the risk factors a little differently.

Keep her at home. More space for those where there is little option but to go.

YABVU OP

If you don't need nursery for employment or sanity, I think you could keep her at home.

For socialisation, could you buddy up with someone else nearby with kids the same age and hang out at the park together regularly? I think that's possible under tier 4 rules and would be less exposure than nursery.

I wouldn't if you can keep her at home. This won't be forever but the numbers are very bad at the moment and any situation where you can reduce contact with others, you should.

In many european countries kindergarden is an option/mandatory from 3 years onwards, sometimes only 5.
Millions of kids are perfectly fine without extensive socializing in normal times as well, let alone now.
Why would you do this? It's a pandemic. Keep her home.

My two year old goes to nursery for childcare while we work, if we didn’t need to work she wouldn’t be going especially now. Our nursery is excellent for keeping everything COVID secure but it’s not guaranteed that one of the children (including mine) won’t take it into the nursery. It’s then putting the other children and their families at risk as well as the staff who work there. I honestly wish I had the luxury of being in this kind of predicament but unfortunately I have to work to keep a roof over our heads.

Mine will be going even though I'm at home but he is 3.

I wouldn’t. She not desperate for stimulation or socialisation at that age. What are you doing with her at home?

Everyone's circumstances are different - it's up to individuals to make their own risk assessments accordingly. I'm keeping my 3yo home next week, but my DP is vulnerable. If he wasn't, I'd probably send her in.

Well it’s a totally personal decision. You’re absolutely within your rights to send her. Nurseries are open. To my knowledge there isn’t any guidance to the effect that you should only send children if you have to for employment. Obviously you won’t get any money back if you don’t send her.

That being said... I have to send my son because my employer, understandably, wouldn’t take kindly to me deciding not to. If I could avoid it I wouldn’t do it for the next couple of weeks, my husband has asthma and Crohns Disease and I am concerned about our son bringing the virus home to him. But it’s health vs employment in our case.

Home, keep her safe and play with her at home.
Also keeps other children and staff safe, where families have no other option.

I think yab-very-u.

Do you really think it's worth the risk of Covid

I think it depends on how big your family is, are there any health conditions, if you meet anyone else etc.

In my case, I am sending my toddler back but I am a single parent and he has no siblings. Our support bubble is 2 hours away so he isn't coming into contact with them anymore. He sees his dad who doesn't come into contact with anyone as part of his job and also lives alone.

On that basis, as toddler will have no one really to spread it to apart from me and his dad who are healthy, on balance, it is best he goes . In any event I will be going back to work shortly full time so there will be no choice.

I have no contact with others, no family close by etc so no risk of spreading. I think the risk of COVID is low therefore was thinking of going ahead, but appreciate these responses.

And by risk I mean for children to get a serious case of COVID.

I’m not risking sending mine for a couple of weeks at least.