AIBU To be annoyed at the way M&S staff treat their customers.

[Bridewel1]

I regularly shop in my local M&S and there have been a number of instances where the staff have been rude when speaking to me through no fault of mine. A number of years ago whilst queuing for clothes even if there was no queue you had to wait for a member of staff to check your items (this now no longer applies). I waited no queue no member of staff to check items and empty cubicles. I got fed up waiting for member of staff so went in an available cubicle only to be confronted by a member of staff whilst half undressed a few mins later saying in a rude tone and stern expression ‘Thought there was nobody in’.
Whilst I was nosying at some food a member of staff was reducing on a trolley they piped up in a stern rude tone ‘you cannot take anything until it’s on the shelf’. 2 occasions this happened.
And during this COVID situation which I know is frustrating they told me off and shouted at me for not keeping my distance just before I’d had chance to stop within 2 metres! And recently when they’d just implemented a one way in the store and one way out. I didn’t realise this was in place and when I was heading towards the entrance to leave I was literally rudely shouted at me across the floor from quite a distance ‘you can’t go out that way’!
And the other day I’d finally decided to buy some boots I’d had my eye on and they’d none left in store. Yet next to the shoes I noticed some green stacked baskets with the boots in that I’d had my eye on that looked like they were waiting to be put out. So I asked a member of staff near by who wasn’t dealing with the shoes who said it should be ok to look in basket, so I did. Then a member of staff who was obviously dealing with the shoes noticed and came over and bit my head off saying ‘they’re not in the sale, they’re just waiting to be put out’ I explained why I was looking and she just wheeled the trolley away. So I asked a member of staff on the counter if the nearest store that i saw online that had the boots in my size would if they’d deliver as that store is a bit for for me to get to and she in a rude tone said ‘no it’s not possible, but we may get some returns in here’. I work in retail myself and I understand that stores have there own policies but that doesn’t give staff the right to be rude to customers! I’ve always been told to be chatty and pleasant when dealing with customers. As much as I love M&S I feel as though I shouldn’t be shopping there anymore! Do you feel I’ve been treated badly.

I bet most of you are quick to Complain but when you receive good service you never see the manager to compliment the member of staff

@notherchge As Maya Angelou says " people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did but people won't forget how you made them feel" and I haven't forgotten the feeling of humiliation for being shouted at as a teenager across the store with heads turning towards me as if I was stealing or committing murder . My only crime was taking an bigger sized item for my mother to try on and no staff was about. Do you think this is normal? I don't give a shit if the staff has had a bad day or understaffed, you don't shout. Btw, I've worked in retail and know how hard it is however, I've always treated people with respect.

Yes I normally wait to be seen to when queuing for changing rooms but there was no assistant and was stood around for over 5 mins so that’s why I went in of my own accord. And whilst ogling reduced items I was stood back just glancing to see if anything took my fancy. It’s not as if I was in there face trying to grab items as soon as they were reduced. I do have some common sense and manners.

The other day we went to do our Christmas click ams collect. I am blind and Ryan’s severe anxiety. I started to have an anxiety attack in the store. I sent my DP to get the order whilst I tried to calm down. Three members of staff came to help me. I am so great full they they calmed me down and looked after me. The lovely staff gave me a ,assume tin if biscuits for Christmas. Love the staff in m&s. You sound super sensitive. Maybe follow the rules and you might not be told off!

@SchrodingersImmigrant

I while it’s nice to be polite it should be unconditional especially when it’s you keeping them in a job.

It works both ways.
It should be unconditional if someone wants something too. Customers should stop being bunch of cunts who think it's fine to tell staff how stupid they are, shout at them because they can't fit their fat arse into small jeans, scream because they didn't realise that chipotle sauce is hot, throw stuff and actually trying to punch staff members.

This all day 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

There’s something about the type of person that expects total forelock tugging deference from everyone in the service industry at all time that makes me feel a bit sorry for them. Like their sense of being a worthwhile person is dependent on being able to lord it over people they perceive as being beneath them. Or something. I don’t find it a personal affront to be reminded of covid procedures if i’m doing it wrong somewhere or somehow, jeez why would i? Why would anyone? I don’t get it. I was behind a woman at the checkouts in sainsburys on christmas eve who threw the mother of all bennies at being asked to step back behind the glass shield thingy. I was absolutely cringing for her.

Shortly before the pandemic started, I had a frozen shoulder that was agony to lift. I had gained weight and had no bras that fit, so when I went to the changing room my wife went with me to help me close the back of the bra.

The lady over the changing room absolutely point blank refused to let her come in with me, insisting it was a shoplifting policy. She wasn’t accepting my sore shoulder as an answer, and was very short and sharp with us, which caught both of us off guard so we didn’t react as we should have (or would have liked to) to ask for a manager for a bit of compassion.

I stood stupidly in the changing cubicle for a minute, unable to get the bra I was wearing off, let alone try the new one on, and then left. The lady stood in the changing room corridor (beside where the curtains are) while I was in there, rather than at the front where they usually hang out, but didn’t call to ask me if I wanted help so was clearly hanging out to see if I was going to lift something - there was no one else in the women’s side of the changing rooms at the time.

I actually have not been back to M&S since; we live in a small town, it’s a small shop, and I’ve just been really put off having to deal with her again when there are alternatives.

Well I wasn’t trying to grab items as they were being reduced I was merely stood near by glancing over just to see if I’d want anything and wait till they’d finished. And there were definitely no signs or arrows indicating entrance exit but all I can think is that they didn’t like people who’d just been in the food department exiting through the clothing entrance and vice versa.

Well I wasn’t trying to grab items as they were being reduced I was merely stood near by glancing over just to see if I’d want anything and wait till they’d finished.

AKA, hovering.

@ObliviouslyIgnorant

Well you're barking at me and it's not even an auditory medium we're communicating over.

If you as you have mentioned are a manager, I'm not surprised that your staff are getting assaulted.

Well you seem bloody lovely @ObliviouslyIgnorant blaming PP for customers assaulting staff.

As soon as customers say staff are barking, screaming or screeching then you know they're exaggerating. What does "it's not even an auditory medium we're communicating over" mean? How are staff meant to communicate with you? Smoke signals?

M&S staff are a mixed bunch. Some are ok, some are crap

Exactly! All nice in my ocal M&S apart from one uppity young woman who loves to tell off customers in a tone like teacher to a pupil, whether you aer older than her or not. I did mildly stand up to her though and just avoid her now.

Not all staff are 'poor lambs' - you can correct customer behaviour if they may have inadvertantly missed a rule, but do so in a nice manner. People aer much more likely to listen to your point if you aer kind and polite. Most staff there do manage that, thankfully.

*are

Well I wasn’t trying to grab items as they were being reduced I was merely stood near by glancing over just to see if I’d want anything and wait till they’d finished.

AKA, hovering

I can't see how hovering at a reasonable distance is such a crime?? I can see that a staff member wouldn't want a group hovering around her but if it's one or two people standing nearby at a covid saf distance - does it really warrant a brusque tone that Op was a subject to? In non-covid times it could get a bit too much with people actually stand right next to the staff member, but guess what - most either shrug it ooff or cheerfully ask to be patient.
In covid times no one is acyually crowding, so OP probably would be fine with that person smiling and saying sshe'll be a few minutes yet - or even (God forbid) asking if she's interested in anything in particular. As I say, from experience ,ost staff deal with this in a friendly yet professional manner.

If OP was trying to reach for something or been all huffy and impatient - that's entirely different matter!

Shop elsewhere?

I don't see the hype TBH.

I'm with you OP. M & S staff are rude.
I had to return a box of tea bags as they were not sealed properly and the tea was sat in the bottom, loose.
The assistant counted the empty bags and announced that some were missing!
No shit Sherlock.
They were in the bin with a lot of loose tea that I'd swept off my floor.
They're anal about queuing.
Their online ordering system allows you to order and pay for a product and then sends an email saying it's out of stock.
And when a friend worked for them his uniform arrived open with half missing, obviously purloined by someone else.

It's only the food section that saves them.

@akittyisyou

Shortly before the pandemic started, I had a frozen shoulder that was agony to lift. I had gained weight and had no bras that fit, so when I went to the changing room my wife went with me to help me close the back of the bra.

The lady over the changing room absolutely point blank refused to let her come in with me, insisting it was a shoplifting policy. She wasn’t accepting my sore shoulder as an answer, and was very short and sharp with us, which caught both of us off guard so we didn’t react as we should have (or would have liked to) to ask for a manager for a bit of compassion.

I stood stupidly in the changing cubicle for a minute, unable to get the bra I was wearing off, let alone try the new one on, and then left. The lady stood in the changing room corridor (beside where the curtains are) while I was in there, rather than at the front where they usually hang out, but didn’t call to ask me if I wanted help so was clearly hanging out to see if I was going to lift something - there was no one else in the women’s side of the changing rooms at the time.

I actually have not been back to M&S since; we live in a small town, it’s a small shop, and I’ve just been really put off having to deal with her again when there are alternatives.

I had an experience when I went in once and a customer was trying on stuff inside the changing room. The staff went to one of the supervisor saying there's a man in there trying on bras. I was waiting to be told which room to go in so I froze when I heard this and next minute the staff was giggling. The curtain opened and a woman walked out and clearly she had a mastectomy on one of her breast as I know what it looks like. The woman had a smokers voice, short hair (probably from chemo) and was dressed very gender neutral- she kind of looked like Jade Goody's mum if anyone remembers her. I felt so bad for her and totally disgusted with the staff giggling about it. This was so wrong on many levels. I'm sure there's very nice staff working there but equally there are very mean staff there so I don't see the point why people are twisting and turning and trying to break op's negative experience making it out as if op's wrong. I've never had one warm welcoming experience from M&S ever as I used to work near one and would get lunch there everyday. My local Tesco's are amazing, they used to ask me about my bump and my well-being and the staff there got me flowers and chocolate when I gave birth and took my baby for his first shopping trip there and on the other hand you have M&S and I used to go there everyday and not even a smile by the staff as I'm a regular.

There is NEVER any need to be ride to customers. And I worked in customer services and retail for many years. Customer services is going massively downhill in this country. There is no need to talk in a rude tone, abruptly or to shout at customers. EVER. You can get the same message across while being polite and well-mannered. In fact that message is usually better received and responded to by delivering it politely and with a smile in your face rather than rudely and aggressively, which is just likely to prompt a confrontational interaction.

The responses on this thread are indicative of why customer service has gone so downhill as people are obviously prepared to put up with crap customer service and so the trend downwards continues.

If you hate Marks and Spencer so much, just stop shopping there

It's a difficult time for retail staff, but there have been some staff that have barked at me when I haven't done anything wrong (shouting at me walking down an aisle the right way just incase I decide to turn around and walk the other way), so I think it's a vicious circle for some people who are rude to customers and then get upset when they are rude back. It isn't just them having a difficult time - we need to be polite to each other. You can still have this during a pandemic, but some people have forgotten this. I have still signed a petition against violence to retail staff though as nobody should feel threatened in their job and I have been in these sort of jobs myself. You do need to reflect on what you did and said as much as customers do too though. It goes both ways.

I do agree some customers have been absolutely vile and have seen their lack of belief in COVID as an excuse to lecture and shout at people. There have been dicks at both ends of the spectrum and a lot of us have encountered one at some point. Sadly I can't see this attitude they have changing once the pandemic is over.

To me it does sound like the staff were rude to you, probably through anxiety more than anything, but it's up to whether you shop there. I wouldn't go back if the experience of shopping somewhere was consistently rubbish.

Agree with you RavingAnnie. People respond better to politeness, so it's pointless being rude in the first place. It's more about their personal frustrations and anxieties than the breaking of rules if the message is delivered in a shitty tone.

M&S staff are a bunch of rude old bags. I’ve given up shopping there because of their lack of decent customer service. The minute you ask them something they are pissed off, fuck that I’ll keep to Asda thanks.

The staff are lovely at my local M and S and Resco also. I absolutely hate going anywhere near the reduced aisle though as you have the same vultures every night waiting yo pounce. I walk away as they don't as and tge staff have to fence themselves in to protect themselves.

Tesco. Strange autocorrect change

Sd changed to as. Grr

I've never had a problem there. Its been a tough year for everyone, so cut them a little slack.

On my local Facebook page this morning is a story from someone whose car broke down in Tesco car park in the snow yesterday and had to wait for over 3 hours for the breakdown company to turn up. The staff couldn't have been kinder, and provided food, coffee and a phone charger while she was waiting.