My DM's dodgy taste of clothing

[Ineedteabags]

My DM and my partners DM buy DD clothes from time to time. My mum buys more than my partners mum prob as she sees her more.
But omg what is with their taste in clothes!? My DM must have a checklist:

1. Does it look like it's made from old curtains- check!
2. Does it have lace- check!
3. Is it a frilly dress completely impractical for a toddler to wear- check!

No ends of dresses that DD has never worn go into the pile that dont fit anymore after maybe wearing it once. Mostly because they look like something a bridesmaid would wear with layers of lace and isn't practical for playing in the park or going for a walk.
I've told her to stop buying them but she still continues, do all DM's out there have awful taste in clothes??

How mean.

They sound horrendous. Luckily I have a DS, otherwise I fear we would've been 'gifted' similar crap. My DM dredged up a white lacy baby dress that was mine. I think it was implied that if my baby was a girl she should wear it. It was scratchy AF; I binned it.

Focus on them being impractical nothing else. About 95% of people or even more in the UK have no taste in clothing, your DM is not unique and should not be singled out.

Just say mum she is climbing all over the place these dresses are not practical if you are buying her can you get her leggings etc etc. You need to be honest with her.

Show her what you like. Send a link before Christmas to an outfit you like and your dd will wear.
I’m sure she will be happy to finally see her granddaughter wearing something she has bought.

@Mrsjayy

Just say mum she is climbing all over the place these dresses are not practical if you are buying her can you get her leggings etc etc. You need to be honest with her.

This. You can’t change her taste but a clear direction and maybe some photos of examples should do it.

IIt’s a common enough problem.

Why don't you say something rather than telling the internet?

@flibbitygibbit this is lighthearted so please dont take offence.
If you saw some of the clothes I'm talking about you would understand lol. I'm very appreciative of her buying things but they are just so impractical.

@mrspotatoheadssheewee I have an older DS and managed to escape this problem with him. She still brought many items of clothes but you cant really go too wrong with in practicality when it comes to boys clothes! 😁

I really don't think OP is being mean - lighten up! The odd impractical dress to be worn once for a photo is one thing but if it's happening constantly it's a massive waste.

Just let dd wear them for climbing around. My dd always wore party type dresses until she was around 6 because she liked them. It didn’t stop her painting or climbing trees or playing in the river and if your dms frilly lacey dresses get ruined in the process, win win!

OP see if you can find a similar style of dress in adult sizes and buy one for your mum and ask if she'll wear it so she can match DD?

Let her wear it- and trash it- as part of normal life.

Also no way would my DD put up with an annoying frilly dress at that age, when she was tiny she'd trip up over it and even until about 4/5 she liked to wear super comfy clothes.

Can you identify a time when such a dress would be suitable; a wedding/baptism/party when COVID is over and task your mum with finding an outfit in the size you anticipate needing. (I’m an absolute mug for pretty dresses but do understand they are not for every day.)

@IMNOTSHOUTING

OP see if you can find a similar style of dress in adult sizes and buy one for your mum and ask if she'll wear it so she can match DD?

LOVE this!!!!

My df always bought dd1 dressed similar to the ones you describe, she loved them. She's an adult now with a son of her own. She wears dresses every day and always has since she got out of school uniform. When she was pregnant she wore dresses even though everybody said she would eventually end up in leggings (she didn't) She wore dresses and tights through maternity leave and she wears dresses and tights working from home. She says she only feels comfortable in a dress and tights. I think YWBU not to allow your dd to wear them when she is old enough to choose tbh.

DSis has a SIL whose taste in dresses for small girls is frilly and flouncy and impractical usually with bows and matching socks. If her DD wore one it would make playing and climbing almost impossible. They are always thrown in the charity bin.

There must be many older readers who always wore dresses when young and had no problems in active play, which in my case, often involved climbing trees on the local common with (horror of horrors) no adults present.

How does wearing a dress make playing and climbing almost impossible? I’m pretty sure little girls have managed it for decades.

@VinylDetective

How does wearing a dress make playing and climbing almost impossible? I’m pretty sure little girls have managed it for decades.

Errr no they definitely haven't this is so daft! As an adult would you wear a frilly dress with bow and ribbons to the rock climbing centre? NO!

My mum wore dresses like that when she was little and was definitely NOT allowed to climb trees. Little toddlers tend to trip up in frilly dresses (my DNeice can't even wear normal dresses without falling over) and older kids just find them uncomfortable, the bows get caught on stuff the lace rubs when running around, the skirt bit of the dress is always flying up and showing off knickers.

Come on people if you wouldn't feel comfortable running and climbing in a frilly, lacey dress a kid won't either. Also it's fairly clear from OP's description the dress looks bloody awful so she's probably embarrassed to take her DD around the park looking like a victorian bridesmaid.

[quote Ineedteabags]@flibbitygibbit this is lighthearted so please dont take offence.
If you saw some of the clothes I'm talking about you would understand lol. I'm very appreciative of her buying things but they are just so impractical.[/quote]
It's not lighthearted, it's rude.

I remember going to a birthday party as a child and being majorly pissed off because I couldn’t climb on the (massively unsafe) wooden pigeon coop in the garden like the boys were, for fear of spoiling my dress. We didn’t have much money, so spoiling clothes was a big no. So while it’s fine to say that it should not prevent climbing, it might put some girls off.

I think some grandparents think pretty dresses are a way of treating the child (not boring everyday clothes), and don’t really consider the practicalities. I would prefer it when DD gets clothes she will get lots of wear out of, but if not I shrug and mentally put it in the pile of ‘most likely to go to a charity shop’.

Frilly dresses are not practical for going out for walks to the park etc. but surely you would just save them for occasions like birthdays?

My dd loves anything sparkly and loves wearing occasion dresses but they are just that. I will dress her in them for parties and special occasions, otherwise she prefers leggings to jeans. The main thing is to dress them appropriately for the occasion surely?

I would gently steer your mum away from buying clothes for your dd or just out and out mention that she isn't a big fan of dresses.

Errr no they definitely haven't this is so daft!

It isn’t daft at all. One of my aunts (born 1907) was apparently an ace climber, she nearly gave my gran heart failure several times. I can well remember tucking my dress into my knickers when I was a kid. Women used to ride horses in long skirts.