To think you don’t buy clothes for the person who has just given birth in their pre pregnancy size?

[coralpig]

Thats it in a nutshell really. I used to be small- size 8-10 and gave birth to twins 5.5 weeks ago and I’m probably a 12-14ish/ medium...it’s hard to tell- I haven’t bought myself new clothes and have been squeezing into my old ones as nowhere to go. I have a tummy now that I didn’t and have been wearing a lot of leggings and smock tops. Sister in law bought me two beautiful jumpers for Christmas and of course they don’t fit. Husband bought me a beautiful coat and some lingerie this morning- it doesn’t fit either. In my sleep deprived state this morning, I cried. I’m super grateful and thanked them all but I also feel like crap about my body (I was already very self conscious about) and this has made me feel even more rubbish.

Omg my mum did this in the summer.

She spent a fortune on joules and white stuff dresses/tops my pre pregnancy size (14) and none were bf compatible. I’m was an 18 at the time now dropped back to a 16 but still BFing so can’t wear t shirt dresses, certainly not size 14 t shirt dresses. Unless I want to get my minge out every time baby wants feeding.

I dont think they could have won no matter what size they bought. If they bought the size you are now, thats like saying youll always be this size. That would have insulted me more. Really, buying clothes at all was the poor decision.

Put them to one size and fo us on the fact they were good quality, nice clothes.

Well I’d rather have had this than clothes bought in my 5.5 weeks post-birth size! Wouldn’t that be insulting to assume that you won’t lose the weight? The likelihood is you’ll lose the weight in no time and then have some lovely new clothes to wear ☺️

Chin up, less than 6 week old twins must be insanely hard work.

I totally get it, same happened to me and you feel like crap!!!!! The intentions were lovely but i cried too!!!😂😂😂you are not alone!!!

Why on earth would they buy clothes for a woman who has very recently given birth?! They are either completely clueless or they knew exactly what they were doing. I don't know which is worse.

Be kind to yourself op; your average mother isn't in her lee pregnancy clothes 5 weeks after giving birth!

I'm 8 weeks PP and I've bought some bits and pieces in sales since I had my baby. I bought it all in my pre-baby size 8 as I don't want to own lots of nice new clothes that don't fit as I naturally slim down. I imagine that this is what your family were thinking too?

It's a tricky one as lots of mums obviously take a while to lose the baby weight and some never do. Our hips and rib cages may also be permanently wider and that can mean that we won't be able to physically fit in our pre-baby clothes but I'm sure they had good intentions.

Just so you know, your body is amazing and beautiful as it is!

Lingerie 5.5 weeks after birth is what I'm more amazed at - the other stuff is silly but my god unless it's massive black pants just why would that even cross someone's mind??!!!!

I think they just weren't thinking at all just put them away at the back of the wardrobe til next year or in my case 3 years time!

Don't stress about it and your body is still in early recovery stages please don't forget that! It typically takes your body 18 months plus to recover please go easy on yourself we all have new bits from birth.

I can highly recommend following channelmum on Instagram it's honest about motherhood, pregnancy and postbsby recovery. None of this I was back in my gym routine after 6 weeks bollocks (which by the way is really dangerous for your body!)

What is dangerous about hitting the gym at 6 weeks? Assuming of course there’s no medical reasons why not.

@canigooutyet

What is dangerous about hitting the gym at 6 weeks? Assuming of course there’s no medical reasons why not.

Your muscles are still recovering, healing, your pelvis can be still moving back to position and relaxin still in your body which means you can completely overdo it and cause serious permanent damage. You also risk the potential of a bladder prolapse if you decide to do weights etc.

General advice is first 12 weeks walking and very gentle strengthening exercises such as adjusted pilates (not before 12 weeks if you have had a c section)

YANBU. I kept wearing my maternity clothes for about a year until I fitted into my pre-pregnancy size again, but I'd had a rough CS and I couldn't squeeze, it was too painful for months. I don't think people should buy other people clothes, it's such a personal thing about what's comfortable and what you like to wear. Still, save them for when you get back to your usual size (it will happen).

@canigooutyet

What is dangerous about hitting the gym at 6 weeks? Assuming of course there’s no medical reasons why not.

You're not even supposed to lift a baby in a car seat for extended time let alone hit the gym. And why are you assuming OP's new size is fat-related rather than everything in her body being in the wrong place post-pregnancy (which is perfectly normal). www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-47404140#:~:text=New%20mothers%20are%20being%20warned,pelvic%20organ%20prolapse%2C%20physiotherapists%20said.

You are so, SO NOT being unreasonable. I’m 37 weeks pregnant and warned absolutely everyone NOT to buy me clothes this Christmas- even socks, as the in-laws usually buy me some fluffy socks or pyjamas for Christmas.
It’s just not nice- nobody wants to be reminded that they’re not who they were physically, and with your babies being so new (congratulations, by the way!!) your family should have realised that clothes were a bad idea. Vouchers, great- you can shop for yourself! Is there any way of asking for receipts so you can exchange for a voucher / credit to get yourself something else?

My body has been wrecked this last six weeks. Difficult end of pregnancy, emergency CS, breastfeeding difficulties and then I got sepsis. DH has sent me to bed for some sleep now so I hope I feel a bit better.

I’m sure they didn’t mean to be unkind. Many women are back in their pre-pregnancy clothes within weeks or months (especially if you’re breastfeeding, I went down a size the first few weeks!)
If they’d bought bigger sizes you might have been upset at the clothes being too big or them assuming you were bigger, so it’s hard to win. Although not buying clothes as gifts would have been more sensitive!

Feeding boobs are generally bigger than normal, plus access required frequently, so jumpers (other than feeding hoodies) not very useful.

Ribcage can take about 6 months to shrink down (went from 34 to 28) in about 6 weeks around that point.

Hips also get wider in pregnancy and then tighten as you get rid of the hormone that was there to let the baby out.

This hormone is also (regardless of c section) why you have to be careful with post baby exercise, back ligament injuries are common.

My then 3 year old managed to really hurt the ligament in one of my fingers about a week after DC2's birth...

Wow op yanbu at all.
I think I would have strangled him with the lingerie.
6 week twins and he thinks you want to put lingerie on to look sexy ? Does he understand why you are upset?

Years ago I was a midwife on a postnatal ward and a patient asked her DH to bring her in some clothes to wear home ( in those days you stayed a good few days). He brought her a prepregnancy cocktail dress. She wasn’t all that grateful

YANBU.exchange the stuff for something soft and comfortable that you can wear now.

Enjoy those babies.

Buying clothes for other adults is fucking weird, pregnancy or not.

I'd have no idea what would suit, fit and be liked by another person and surely no-one wants someone else choosing their clothes?

I think the only unreasonable thing here is they didn,t check your size. I fitted in to my pre preg clothes straight away. But many people find it hard to loose pregnancy weight others find they gain weight. They should have checked first.

Buying clothes is not wierd in my family quite standard actually.

They were thoughtless and you are tired. Try to let it go. (Apart from the lingerie 5w postpartum; that is so inappropriate- even if you were feeling sexy who is taking the time to groom and slip on lingerie with 2 tiny babies around?!?!?)

Jumpers I could understand and let go, but fucking lingerie?!?

If anyone bought be lingerie less than 6 weeks after giving birth to twins I’m not sure if I’d cry or just go into fits of hysterical laughing.

How the fuck does anyone thing lingerie is an appropriate gift?!?

I wouldn't buy clothes at all for someone who had just given birth. That close to PP most people are just wearing baggy stuff and not caring. If you buy clothes that fit them now they might be huge in a few months and be a reminder of their new size. If you buy the old size they won't fit and it's depressing.

Ugh, I hear you.
I have only a few weeks of my pregnancy, and my DM bought me maternity clothes a size too small (very poor quality and would never wear) + a mocktail book
I cried when I opened them due to the sheer thoughtlessness.
I shouldn’t expect anything better, she rarely thinks practically . But, I haven’t brought myself to speak to her today, as I’m so annoyed at her (about more than just the gifts).
Don’t buy a pregnant or postpartum woman clothes. It’s just as simple as that.

I don't get why you think they're being thoughtless, sorry. Most people do get back to their pre-pregnancy size within a few months. And if they'd bought you bigger clothes, surely that could have been construed as just as thoughtless?