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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be too scared to have a shower.

32 replies

TVDFan · 19/12/2020 17:09

I had keyhole surgery on Wednesday to remove my gallbladder.

I came home the same day but I've struggled with pain and lack of sleep. The one thing I've been putting off is going for a shower and changing the dressing.

I don't know why but I'm terrified. I'm scared of getting in and out. I'm scared of seeing my wounds. What if they open? What if it hurts like hell?

I know IABU and just looking for some reassurance really ☹

OP posts:
Gardeniaofdelights · 19/12/2020 17:10

I felt this way after an appendectomy - you just have to bite the bullet! It will be nowhere near as bad as you think and will actually make you feel a lot better.

Hope you’re on the mend soon! Flowers

HUCKMUCK · 19/12/2020 17:10

That sounds painful. Have you got someone with you who can stay in the bathroom while you shower? YANBU, having surgery can be scary. Take care Flowers

christmasbell · 19/12/2020 17:11

Hey there I had a c section 2 weeks ago and not that it's nearly the same but I was terrified to remove the dressing I had to get someone to do it for me. My advice is to get it really wet and do it as quick as possible that's what the nurse did with me. And it feels so good to have a nice shower.

Rainallnight · 19/12/2020 17:11

Poor you. My MIL had keyhole surgery last week to remove her ovaries and discovered that her first shower and looking at the wounds wasn’t nearly as bad as she expected. She was so surprised by how small they were.

Good luck.

anguauberwaldironfoundersson · 19/12/2020 17:12

You'll be fine, they look a bit grim but they won't open! I had surgery on a Friday and was out and about the next day. My wounds were stapled and the only issue I had was my belly button wound was over granulating so they had to put silver stuff on it a week later.

VimFuego101 · 19/12/2020 17:12

As a previous poster said, I think you'll be surprised by how small they are.

Redheadedscarecrow · 19/12/2020 17:15

I felt exactly like you after my c section. I was scared the water would dissve the stitches! In reality it won't happen. As PP said, soak the dressing and remove from edges gently. It may help to keep bathroo. Door open and talk to whoever is in the house while you do it. I promise it will be fine.

Tinkerbellflowers · 19/12/2020 17:20

I had a hysterectomy just over a week ago and removed the dressing on Wednesday. I was terrified that the wound would just open up. But it's remarkable how quickly our bodies heal and wounds close. I know exactly how you are feeling. Have someone with you if possible. And have a nice clean towel ready, and a cosy warm dressing gown. Then a nice cup of tea!

Dddccc · 19/12/2020 17:34

I have had mine out and biggest scar is an inch you will be fine remove old dressings and have a shower just don't scrub and gently wipe the area

Chloemol · 19/12/2020 17:48

I had mine out, keyhole, with three very small scars. Just take a shower and change the dressing

Eaumyword · 19/12/2020 17:53

I felt the same when I tried to chop my fingers off earlier this year! Terrified it would hurt more!
The nurse told me wounds heal better when clean and moist after the initial sealing up period and actually the wounds became more comfortable and flexible after they had got wet.
Deep breath, gently wet your dressing, then slowly peel it off. Afterwards, dab dry not rub. It won't be as bad as you fear.

2bazookas · 19/12/2020 17:58

Keyhole surgery entry points are tiny, and have been stitched shut. Mine (3) were so tiny they only had one stitch each and I wouldn't even dignify them as "wounds".

The pain you're feeling is not from those teensy little things, honest. Your internal organs have been moved about by the instruments and camera so there's little bit of internal bruising and displacement which will settle down in a few days. Take some paracetamol for discomfort.

So, nothing is going to unravel or drop out when you take the dressing off. As soon as you see how small the "wounds" are you'll be completely reassured.

Enjoy your shower, you will feel a million times better after it.

Squaddiemum7 · 19/12/2020 18:05

Hi, it's ok to feel worried as surgery can be really daunting. When I need to shower after surgery, I have my DH in the bathroom with me and get him to change the dressings for me. That way, I don't have to see the wounds as this makes me anxious. Is there anyone who can help you with this?

Hoghedge10 · 19/12/2020 18:19

There's no rules on how you have to shower, if it makes it easier for you mentally and/or physically then lie down or sit in the shower. Take a stoot/waterproof chair in. Shower in your underwear if you want nobody else will know or care what you do in your shower. Do whatever you need to make it a little easier for yourself.

The first few times you could shower in a t-shirt if you wanted, it might be a bit awkward trying to clean yourself under it but who cares.

Hoghedge10 · 19/12/2020 18:19

*stoot = stool

My fat fingers strike again

EllaM777 · 19/12/2020 18:28

I had keyhole surgery for my gallbladder removal. I recovered really quickly and the wounds are really small. Please don’t worry, the adhesive on the dressings are worse than the wounds. It must be a relief to be finally free of the gallbladder pain.

Original poster
TVDFan · 20/12/2020 00:42

After putting it off all evening I've finally had my shower.

DH stayed with me and did all the removing and replacing of the dressings. He's been an absolute gem 💎.

Wasn't as bad as I feared. I have 4 wound. Two of which look tiny the other two look very bruised😅

Thank you for all your encouragement!

OP posts:
theblackparade · 20/12/2020 00:47

You smashed it!

After I had a laparoscopy I was absolutely terrified that something would, I don’t know, fall out of me?! For weeks afterwards Grin So well done you for being brave!

SenorFrog · 20/12/2020 00:51

Well done. I dried my c section wound with a hair dryer set in cool, I was so much happier with that than a towel.

Sh05 · 20/12/2020 00:52

Glad to hear that! I remember feeling like I'd been punched after my gallbladder surgery. Its your insides all settling back and like pp said bruising but you'll start to feel more human in a day or two

blueberryporridge · 20/12/2020 01:20

Worth taking arnica tablets for the bruising. I felt they helped me a lot after my 2 c-sections and my gallbladder removal. Hope you start feeling better soon. Also: take painkillers regularly if you aren't already doing so. No medals for not taking them, and taking them regularly will stop the pain breaking through.

CharlotteRose90 · 20/12/2020 01:35

Oh no I felt like this after my gallbladder surgery. I waited a week and once the nurse had taken my dressings off my mum helped me to shower. It sounds stupid as I was 28 at the time but for me it had been a traumatic experience and I felt like my body was worse then it was if that makes sense. Didn’t hurt and my stitches were fine. I did sit in the bath though rather then stand up.

BashfulClam · 20/12/2020 01:38

Keyhole surgery is amazing as it’s just tiny little incisions (I’m confused as to how the pull things out via the tiny holes???). Most of the pain will be internal.

christmasbell · 20/12/2020 02:15

Hope you feel better OP

Whataliberty · 20/12/2020 02:16

Hello there, I had the same procedure two years ago. It is scary but you'll be surprised how small the wounds are and how quickly they heal. Like a previous poster said, I just sat in the bath for the first couple of weeks to wash. Recovery is quite fast. The worst pain for me was straight after the operation in my shoulder strangely, I think this is because they fill your tummy with air and inflate you a bit and the gas is trying to leave your body. Wishing you a speedy recovery Flowers