To ask for your experiences. People keep telling me my 7 year old daughter is going to ‘change’ her personality....

[Flamingo1980]

I’m curious to know what people have experienced/think about this.

My seven year old daughter has always been a pretty laid back and happy kid. Throughout her life people have noticed this a lot and I’ve had them say things like “oh that won’t last” “that means she will be a nightmare teenager” “oh you wait that will all change when she’s older”.

Which is sort of fine, it’s not like I just expect her to be this easy all of her life but i thought I would ask on here for an opinion as I have no idea having only been a parent for seven years. Is it an old wives tale or is there truth in it? I obviously know teenagers are tricky but is it an entire personality change over?

The only things I have to go on is that I read somewhere that children’s personality is set by the time they are three or four. And that I don’t feel like my personality has changed that much in my life. Except when I was 14 and a complete car crash of a teenager.

Would be interested to hear your experiences and and opinions as someone said it again yesterday and it’s starting to get a bit annoying now if I’m honest...

YANBU - Kids personalities stay pretty much the same.
YABU - Kids personalities change- become the opposite as they grow and mature.

IIRC I once read a study that said by 7 a child's personality is set. I think it is a Jesuit saying, "Give me the child until he is 7 and I will give you the man." As a Catholic I'm not sure all boys educated by the Jesuits would share the sentiment. As a girl I just had the nuns.

All of mine were different people at 16/17 compared to 6-7yo, tbh.

Some do, some don't. People are all different. And some changes are more noticeable than other kinds.

I was a very timid, shy, and in some ways arrogant child. Didn't change much during puberty. Changed drastically in my twenties. Now a far more outgoing adult.

Ds has always been a very easy child, contented baby, there were a few toddler tantrums and few after they were not everyday and from frustration

He has his moments and went through a very difficult time but that was to do with our situation and he was desperately sad and became very anxious, he is over that and has now returned to the easy going happy little bunny

He is 13 sometimes a bit moody and back chats, obsessed with gaming but that’s it

I can’t see him having a huge personality change. He really is a lovely thoughtful and kind boy just he has become adverse to showering or cleaning his teeth 😬

My DS1 was a very highly strung 7/8/9 yo with an incredible sense of right and wrong, which would often lead to temper outbursts at injustice. As a teenager, he was far more laid back. He used to try to be a sulky teenager sometimes but he couldn't keep it up with a straight face grin
This! It describes my DS perfectly. Suddenly from about age 11, his anger or sulkiness would dissolve into laughter. He'd joke, 'I'm making angry noises here!'

Take no notice OP. My DD was a lovely laid back baby. I was told to 'just wait' for the terrible two's. She was adorable may 2. I was told to 'just wait' for when she starts school... all was fine. Was told that her hormones would be a killer for me... she's coping with everything just fine 🤷‍♀️

She has her moments, as do I! But generally speaking she's just as laid back as she's ever been.

Ignore people who spout the negative stuff.

I think the McDonald's Christmas advert with the sulky kid in a hoodie is a brilliant description of a child struggling to be miserable. Not sure why some are like that but I definitely recognised it.

My ds was a dream baby and toddler...a very cute, well behaved although very energetic primary aged child...he got to nine/ten and became an absolute nightmare! Rude, moody etc although we sometimes see glimpses of the old him...I'm hoping it's a phase and i will be rewarded with a well behaved teenager...fingers crossed

They don’t become the opposite. They do change, go through easier and more difficult periods as they grow.
My youngest was a highly strung demanding baby and toddler. Once he went to school he became much more laid back and is still at 13.
My 15 year old was the most placid baby and toddler and is basically still very laid back.
In fact my other 4 are pretty much the personality they have always been, for better and for worse.

Yes my ds tries to sulk

But he is too chatty to keep it up for long and will start to laugh at himself

When ds had his first toddler tantrum my mum was looking offer him I came him and it carried on it was so out of character we assumed he was feeling unwell

Well my dd was an opinionated, strong willed little madam as a toddler, and still is at 26. DS was a laid back easy going little chap as a toddler and is the same as a young man. Does that help?

Mine were really hard toddlers. Destructive loud boys. Primary school was hard they were difficult. Now they are calm and placid teens thank god. No idea what happened. My discipline worked maybe 😂🙈

Could never have predicted how either child would have turned out.

1: Difficult baby, temperamental toddler, hard to settle at playgroup and school (didn't like being left); good-natured and affectionate primary school child, well-behaved teenager, happy, academically bright, sporty, sociable and kind. Developed clinical depression at 15 and has bipolar diagnosis as an adult which affects everything. But is lovely, gentle, accommodating, kind.
2: Easy baby, temperamental toddler, well-behaved and polite at school but combative at home as child and teenager, a nightmare at university age (not wild but hostile and difficult). In twenties became an absolute sweetheart, thoughtful and appreciative, and has remained so.
As for me - very easy baby (I'm told!), naughty primary school child, class clown and always in trouble, turned into swotty strait-laced teenager and conformist introverted adult.

Wait and see!

@Valeatqueave well you have had alot of change to deal with. I hope child 1 is doing OK.

I was an easy baby, stubborn toddler, well behaved at school, discovered boys and it all went downhill.

@Valeatqueave, sorry that was rude, I hope child 2 is doing well, I didn't mean to ignore them.

I was a nightmare baby, child, teenager and young adult. So not all personalities change, lol.

My DD1 was a very easy, calm child whereas my DD2 was a tantrummy temperamental wilful nightmare. Once she got to about 10, DD1 became argumentative and difficult, and the teenage years were stroppy. She is just calming down now and she's 24!!
Meanwhile DD2 has calmed down to become much calmer and reasonable and was an easy teenager.
So there may be some truth in what people are saying. Who knows? Enjoy your DD OP and what will be, will be.

@ancientgran

Not rude at all, I knew what you meant and thank you for asking!

Life isn't easy for no. 1 but a good partner and close family relationships do help - along with quite good professional help over the years, some better than others.

No. 2 seems to be doing well (apart from recent medical challenges but not insurmountable).

My middle dd now 12 was so laid back and quite to the point you'd almost forget she was there. Now she just seems to be a ball of anger. My eldest 17 was a quiet easy child. She had and still has her moments but shes still very easy going. All kids differ

@ancientgran
So glad your difficult one turned up trumps in the end!