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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think some people ( like me) aren't great at careers?

58 replies

malificent7 · 15/12/2020 20:23

I do well academically but when it comes to getting and keeping a job ...that is a different thing.
I struggled to get a job as teacher and now I have retrained (NHS) i just got turned down for my 1st job interview. I know I have to try harder but some of my peers just walked into their first role.
Truth be told , I often feel totally overwhelmed at work and am much happier pottering around at home. I just cannot cope with the cut and thrust of office politics but I need to coz of money.

OP posts:

CoronaIsWatching · 15/12/2020 20:25

I'm the same, work fills me with dread I don't get motivated by it at all. I had 4 months off over summer with furloughed and I adored every minute of it. I'm more about work/life balance than chasing the £££ .

Mycircusmymonkey · 15/12/2020 20:27

Teaching and health care are quite challenging areas to work in it might just be you need to find a much less pressured working environment and look at a very different field of work.

SauvignonGrower · 15/12/2020 20:30

I'm fine at getting jobs but I deal with stress quite badly so tend to crash out after a year or two. I wish we would trade down to a tiny house so I didn't have to work but DH doesn't want to.

Thankssomuch · 15/12/2020 20:35

There are lots of people who aren’t career oriented. Or who like working. Why do you think you should be? It’s not a given and you’re not here to live up to anyone else’s expectations ( if that is the case). Just do whatever you want to.

ThursdayLastWeek · 15/12/2020 20:36

Part time minimum wage suits me just fine.

Original poster

malificent7 · 15/12/2020 20:40

However traching and healthcare both offer good, stable incomes and pensions which i need.

OP posts:

Original poster

malificent7 · 15/12/2020 20:42

And I am passionate about the role im training for. For example in my first year exams I got 99%, 88%and 85 in my exams. This year I just missed a 1st...i mean i put my heart and soul into learning ...its facinating.

OP posts:

blubberball · 15/12/2020 20:43

Yep. I don't like/can't cope with work either. I'm off sick at the moment, and I don't miss it at all. I have enough health problems for me to struggle day to day, but not enough to be registered disabled. Some doctors say that I could be classed as disabled, but I don't know. When I'm well, I love my job. But I could quite happily never work again. I'm kept busy looking after my dc, and my youngest has a disability.

blubberball · 15/12/2020 20:44

Need to win the lottery.

GreenGordon · 15/12/2020 20:44

Have two PG Diplomas, one MSc and working towards PhD. Also have part time minimum wage job and own business. Never ever had any success at all working in a job.

Winecheesesleep · 15/12/2020 20:48

Careers are pretty recent things really. Plenty of people don't need a career to be fulfilled in life and plenty do - we're all different

Milkshake7489 · 15/12/2020 20:49

I'm good academically and great at getting jobs... but I can't cope at all in an office environment.

After trying multiple options I gave up and went freelance.

There are some negatives (no guaranteed income or holiday pay!). But I am infinitely happier outside of 'normal' employment

dayswithaY · 15/12/2020 20:49

I feel we are all encouraged to "be something" in the world of work and mundane jobs are often seen as failure. But everyone's different, some people just aren't as motivated as others. I'm usually happiest at home, surrounded by things I love and enjoying the quiet. Work exhausts me and I've never found any job truly fulfilling. There are careers I am interested in but I don't want to do them badly enough to put myself through years of training/studying.

Some people were put on this earth to just bumble about and that's okay. I'm very good at under achieving.

SparklingLime · 15/12/2020 20:56

Can I ask what sort of area of healthcare you have trained in, @malificent7? If you feel such enthusiasm for it, is that may be not coming across at interview?

ilovesooty · 15/12/2020 20:59

Have you asked for interview feedback?

Leaannb · 15/12/2020 21:00

Some people aren't. But I have a feeling this jas to do with some kind of anxiety disorder

Shouldibuythishouse · 15/12/2020 21:01

This is me, I’m in a “career” job and just can’t cope with it. I keep trying as after years of training I should be reaping the rewards and am also embarrassed to admit to family and friends I can’t deal with it. But honestly I l’m barely hanging onto my sanity and would quite happily never work again.

Circumlocutious · 15/12/2020 21:02

YANBU but here you'll get told that you need a minimum 300k pension or you'll die old, cold and penniless on the streets.

Wordblind101 · 15/12/2020 21:02

Me! I’m over qualified for the job I’m in. I know I should be earning more, but can’t face the extra responsibility. I still bring all my ability to the low paid job I’m in. So I’m effectively giving my skills out for free. It pisses me off that I’m such a whiimp. I know the company I work for realises hpw much I bring to the table, but they don’t recognise it financially. which means they don‘t recocogize it all.

thelegohooverer · 15/12/2020 21:05

I was very academic but it all came a bit too easy to me, I think. Dd isn't as gifted academically but she’s got grit and graft and I think it will take her further. I did ok at work when I was in very structured environments but less well when I had to self motivate. I love being a sahm more than I ever loved working because there’s so much time to think now. I purposely avoid SM because it’s really embarrassing how little I’ve achieved (aside from happiness) given my potential.

SarahAndQuack · 15/12/2020 21:06

I do get why it's depressing to get a rejection, but ... you're mentioning you got turned down for one job interview? Who doesn't?

And equally, who doesn't feel (at least sometimes) that they'd rather potter around at home than work to earn money? I love my job much of the time, and I still often feel like that.

I think it's a mistake to take those things and decide you're 'not great at careers'. It's fine to decide you don't want certain things in your life, so long as you can afford to make the decision. IMO, it is not fine to turn it into an 'us and them' situation when you pretend to yourself that you're special and different because you don't enjoy working hard and felt knocked back by an interview rejection or two. Everyone feels like that sometimes. And then most people have accept that and then knuckle down. Unless you have inherited wealth, there's not much other option.

Original poster

malificent7 · 15/12/2020 21:14

I know this SarahandWuack and I do agree....but I wish it didnt make me so terribly stressed.

OP posts:

Original poster

malificent7 · 15/12/2020 21:16

I think its because my mate got offered the job and another one so ahe turned down the job i was after. She is clearly fab at interviews ( and very good at her job) so i will ask het how she did it.

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inquietant · 15/12/2020 21:16

I wouldn't work if didn't need to, it makes me overwhelmed too. Is only recently people startedmeasuring themsves solely by their jobs.

Butchyrestingface · 15/12/2020 21:21

I can't do job interviews. At all. Eventually, I got so sick and disheartened at the feedback and having such a clearly unacceptable personality/character/face, that I gave up.

I've worked freelance for 20 years as a sole trader. Been having the time of my life at work during Lockdown but more generally speaking, I would have preferred salaried employment.

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