Friend called me "salt of the earth" - compliment or not?

[ruthyrubie1029]

I always thought it was patronising but said in a nice way??

This is lovely thing your friend has said good honest person.

It’s very naive to think class is the preserve of the Brits.

I won't disagree with this, but in many parts of the world while there are the wealthy and the not-so-wealthy and some people think they are better than others people here don't bang on about what "class" they are and who went to what school. I've never heard anyone in my country describe themselves as belonging to a "class".

I'd take it as reliable, loyal and steadfast.

Huge compliment. Not at all patronising.

[quote IMNOTSHOUTING]@tinselfest

Actually you're the one who's wrong. People use different phrases in different ways. Clearly lots of people do use it in a patronising 'common but nice' kind of way as lots of us have testified to.[/quote]
As with spellings, people might use phrases in different ways and with different meanings, but it doesn't necessarily mean they are correct.

If the op is English and the speaker from northern Ireland, the speaker will tend to assume that the op is quite posh.
Class in northern ireland is very complex, due to grammar schools, accents, wealth or lack of, religious affiliations etc. England is more straightforward. I don't know about Scotland or Wales as I never lived there.

I’ve only heard it said patronisingly about the working class too, often meant as a back handed compliment

If the op is English and the speaker from northern Ireland, the speaker will tend to assume that the op is quite posh.

Can you explain further?

I’m from ROI and if I hear somebody from the UK speak, I wouldn’t assume they were posh at all.

The only exception would be if they had a RP accent and even then I’d be unsure if it was just an affected accent.

If the op is English and the speaker from northern Ireland, the speaker will tend to assume that the op is quite posh

ah no, not so much.

I have never heard it as patronising. It's a great conpliment. Some people find offence in everything.

I'm from Belfast but lived in England for years. I had a friend in recruitment for UK companies. They had a policy of giving NI applicants extra weighting when scoring interviews, because they were so diffident. Much more recently I asked an Oxbridge tutor about it, and he said he felt this is still true. Not just with applications for undergraduate places, but also in examining viva.
Any opinions from anyone? I am not in the uk, or even NI now.

@stitchy

To be honest I've always found it deeply patronising, the sort of thing middle class people say about working class people. Essentially 'a bit rough but nice despite it'

I thought this too but having looked it up, we were wrong. Or a bit wrong. It was perhaps adopted by middle class people to patronise working class.

eggandonion

I think some Irish people are modest and shy.

Can we go back to your statement though please where you stated -
If the op is English and the speaker from northern Ireland, the speaker will tend to assume that the op is quite posh

Please explain this?

That is the implication of the two discussions I had - almost an implication that being English is somehow superior. I agree there is a modesty, but beyond that maybe a lack of self esteem?
I hope things are improving - Northern Ireland media people like Andrea Catherwood, Patrick Kielty, Ian Woods, Eamon Holmes are good role models for anyone who feels they have to hide their light under a bushel! Modest and shy aren't useful at interviews.
Being dead on has to be displayed!

(I still think being salt of the earth is a good thing to be in Northern Ireland whatever your background).

It's a great compliment, sure, but not when given by someone you fancy.

Egg I find it a bit odd that the conclusion you've drawn from two conversions with people who live in England is that NI people generally find English people posh and have a lack of self esteem.

I know lots of English people who've moved to NI and they're generally all lovely but I wouldn't say they're considered posh or a danger to their friends and acquaintances self esteem

It's natural to have differences between countries in manners and self presentation isn't it? So an interviewer who acknowledges differences to their own national background or whatever is surely making an active choice not to unconsciously favour candidates from the same background?

I thought it was a lovely compliment.

Oooh I'd always understood it to mean 'not very posh, but very nice' hahaha. So a compliment, but with class connotations!

@stitchy

To be honest I've always found it deeply patronising, the sort of thing middle class people say about working class people. Essentially 'a bit rough but nice despite it'

Exactly how I have thought of it...meant to say you're kind, honest, down to earth but comes across as being looked down upon.

Actually you're the one who's wrong. People use different phrases in different ways. Clearly lots of people do use it in a patronising 'common but nice' kind of way as lots of us have testified to.

As with spellings, people might use phrases in different ways and with different meanings, but it doesn't necessarily mean they are correct.

Clearly this thread has been a bit of an eye-opener for you @tinselfest

You can keep saying that ‘salt of the earth’ is only a compliment, but that doesn’t make it true.

To me it’s a compliment, no edge to it. A couple of people spring to my mind when I hear the phrase and they are decent, thoughtful non-pretentious people - the do anything for you, but love a good party sort. For me the class of the person is not relevant to the phrase.

I think the self esteem issue was considered innate, it wasn't something English people did to the Ulster folk. In a way it is good that the people doing the interview were aware, through experience, of the way people tended to put themselves down a bit. Despite being as qualified on paper as the other candidates.

In my mind it means a bit "common" but lovely at the same time. I wouldnt be overly pleased to be called it personally as I think it's a but snobby, but that's obviously just my take on its meaning

That is the implication of the two discussions I had - almost an implication that being English is somehow superior.

I am raising my eyebrows at the conclusion you have drawn to be honest.

Perhaps this is reflective of your own beliefs and self esteem?
I did not grow up in NI but I can’t imagine it is very different to ROI. I don’t know anyone who thinks a UK accent is posher.
In fact I find it quite bizarre that anyone would think that.

Likewise I would not imagine that, despite their different accents, that Canadians think Americans are superior to them or Australians think New Zealander’s are superior to them.

A RP accent is the exception but again in ROI this would often be as likely to be seen as ‘put on’ in an effort to appear posh.