To put off conceiving another year...

[hellymissy]

I Had a miscarriage age 32, I'm now 34 and have had a huge opportunity career wise come about.

This is a One in a million opportunity I can't say what it is as it would be outing but it's seriously a big deal and if I could say what it is I think most people would agree.

It means if have to put off trying for 6-12 months which means I'd be conceiving age 35.

Am I mad to prioritise career for another year over conceiving?

I’m not a medical professional so feel free to ignore me - as I’m assuming that your fertility would not massively decline between 34 and 35? If so, I’d say go for the job.

I would say go for it too. Personally I don’t think 35 is too old to try and conceive but I suppose you just never know how long it is going to take. And I suppose also a factor would be if you want to try for more than one child too. Congratulations with the job news!

TTC after 35 declines and may need assistance. I'm 33 and have been TTC since March. It's something that can happen straight away but may not. If you want to wait until age 35 then there's nothing wrong with that, just be prepared for things to take a bit longer than you think.

I think it depends. Picture yourself at 70, what would you regret more:

• taking the job, putting off conceiving and potentially it not happening (what if you struggle etc)
• or not taking the job and never getting a similar opportunity and falling pregnant

Granted you might take the job and easily fall pregnant no problems but I find making life decisions based off what I will regret more helps

The different between fertility at 34-35 is marginal

Also please consider how many children you want. If you do conceive at 35 and have the baby at 36 want another, you may have to conceive again at 38 to 39 ish.

If this job is decently paid and if you have trouble conceiving in the future, you may be in a more financially secure position to afford help such as private healthcare etc perhaps?

Thanks guys you've made me feel much less selfish and at leave with going for the job - DH says the same it is going to make marginal difference. When we conceived last time it was successful second month so fingers crossed it means it might happen quickly again.

Absolutely go for the job!! Fertility gradually declines, it doesn't just disappear overnight.
I took 5mths to conceive my first at 39 and 18mths to conceive my 2nd (currently 30wks pregnant at 42).

If it is not for the same organisation make sure you have the same maternity provision. I had to work for my company for 2 years to get full requirement.

I put off trying a baby from 31 to 33 for work as my view was if I did not try I would never know. My role is not conducive to having a young child but wanted to feel fulfilled in my achievements before having a baby as I will not be able to give work my everything like I have to date.

Maybe get a fertility examination privately if fertility is a concern.

Go for the job!

No harm in putting it off a year but I speak from experience in that's it then took us 2 years to conceive and now I fear I am too old to go for number two. So just think about the possibility you may only have one child if you wait too long

I had kids at 25 and 35, the biggest difference was my energy levels. At 25, sleepless night were a breeze, even as as completely single parent. In my 30s, even with a completely supportive partner who shared all duties/feeds etc, parenting a new born nearly broke me. I am 40 and she is a bad sleeper and I look 10 years older than I did when I gave birth. Personally I so wish I could've given birth to my second at a much younger age.

As long as you only want one more it is unlikely to make a massive difference. Would a general fertility check up - ovarian reserve etc be a good idea to help weigh things up?

Your fertility really starts to decline at 40, not 35. Go for it! I had my two at 37 and 39, and my career defining moment came at 35. It changed my life and I’m so so glad I had that opportunity.

Thanks so much everyone honestly you've stopped me having a major panic!!

The Job is only a short term contract a few months but it's the kind of thing where big big doors can open after. However, after it I am not postponing again! That's it, it's baby time lol!

Go for the job. Its tangible not hypothetical

I conceived much easier at 33 than I did at 28.

I'd say go for it.

For me it would depend what you want more, career or baby. If you really want the good career opportunity go with that as you’ll regret not doing it. If a baby is more important to you then don’t put it off, if you need help successfully having a baby (and a miscarriage could be fluke but could also point to problems) then you don’t want to be over 35 as a lot of councils stop NHS funding for fertility issues at 35 and it can also be harder with more risk of issues over that age. Personally I decided a baby was more important and I don’t regret it at all now she’s here. But there’s no right answer it’s up to you which you feel is more important to you.

Am I the only one that is DYING to kmow what the job is?! Go for it OP!

I'm also intrigued by what kind of job is that outing.

I'd normally say go for the job, but a friend of mine has just found out at 32 that she has significant fertility issues that she had no idea about until she started trying to conceive. Could you pay for a private test to see where you stand currently?

Go for the job x

Is it a TV role any chance? =)

I’d go for the job!

Personally, work isn’t that important to me. I got pregnant one month into a new job. But you have to do what’s right for you OP.