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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want my living room back

53 replies

kitkat6 · 06/12/2020 19:15

We have a 5 not far off 6 year old DS, he has all his toys in a downstairs cupboard and in the living room. His brother is 11 so they rarely play together therefore he plays in the living room with his stuff. How long before I can reclaim the space and evict everything upstairs to his own bedroom?

OP posts:
Mintjulia · 07/12/2020 03:41

Ds was 10 when I finally tidied the last of the Lego away. It's lovely to have a tidy sitting room but I preferred my ds to play downstairs with me rather than be on his own and lonely upstairs.

There are still chargers and cables and spare mice under the sofa cushions though. Smile

flowerpotsandrain · 07/12/2020 04:37

We kept all but teddies in the living space till about age 3, then it was 50/50 living room and bedroom. Around age 8 about 80% of the toys went upstairs, but the other 20% and a games console were in the living room as they like to have company whilst playing sometimes.

I'm still happy with the console and 20% in the living room as it is their living room too, and they can play there whilst I'm working from home. I would hate our family living room to only be about adults, and would be sad if my 5 year old didn't have anything of theirs through the rest of the house. Toys like lego that they like to leave set up for days need to stay upstairs, but things that can be happily tidied up at short notice can be played with in the living room.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 07/12/2020 05:05

Nope. Its mine and husband's. They just get to borrow it from time to time

I can't tell if that's sarcastic or not, but if so, I don't quite get the point - sorry.

They can play in the living room without storing their toys there. That is what their room is for. Storing their things

So do you have a completely empty living room, then? Do you keep your telly, PC/laptop/tablet/phone, books, ornaments etc. etc. in your own room, bring it to the living room to use or look at it and then take it back again out of view?

Children don't just play with toys to make a mess or annoy you - they're how they learn, communicate and are entertained, just like you are with a telly, laptop, books or whatever.

You run your household the way you think best, but I personally would hate to think that my DS might grow up feeling that we tolerate him, blame him for being a child and resent his very presence being observable in the home that is for all of us in the family.

Tsubasa1 · 07/12/2020 05:40

We have a large kallax unit in the living room. 90% of the toys are kept there, paper and stuff for drawing and books (cuddly toys in the bedroom). They keep themselves busy all day pulling out books or different toys. And its so easy to tidy up as nothing needs to be moved from room to room and the toys don't seem to migrate very far from the living room!

grafittiartist · 07/12/2020 06:25

I do get it- I remember that feeling- but Its their space too.
My stuff is in the living room, so their stuff can be too.
It won't be long until they want to be in their rooms all the time. Goes quickly.

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 07/12/2020 06:33

In our current house we turned our dining room into a playroom because our 3 have to share a bedroom but we move to a 3 bed on wednesday so my son 5yrs will have all his toys in his room in trofast units, my daughters 2yrs and 3yrs will have theirs in their room in kallax units and the only toys downstairs will be the play kitchen and dolls prams.

CeeceeBloomingdale · 07/12/2020 06:36

We've got toys in every room in the house. They are hidden in ottoman in the living room and all toys have to go away before bed.

KatharinaRosalie · 07/12/2020 06:44

Now. I have a 5 year old, all the toys are upstairs. If she wants to play downstairs, she can bring the toy she is playing with down, not the entire collection.

Mamanyt · 07/12/2020 06:54

@kitkat6

Yes they do. 11 year old has the largest room it has a sofa and TV in there plus his Xbox.

5 year olds room is a decent size.

Spare room is an office for my work

Right now. And don't let him spill over into your work space. He is more than old enough not to need direct, eyes-on supervision every moment.
HuntedForest · 07/12/2020 06:55

Youngest was 6 when we got rid of the toy corner in the living room and insisted most went to their rooms. It was also when they started to play more together. They can have one toy set which is allowed in the corner of the living room (currently playmobil nativity and police Hmm ) and one jigsaw puzzle out. Lego stays in their rooms. They sometimes bring it out if DH is out but it goes back before he gets home.

DD has found lockdown hard and doesn't want to be alone in her room.

All craft supplies are in a cupboard in the living room and all craft is done at the dining table.

polkadotclip · 07/12/2020 06:55

Another vote for encouraging children to play in the communal family area where you can get involved in their play and projects and enjoy listening to them playing.

Plenty of time for them to hang out in their rooms and be monosyllabic when they are teens. This is the time you get to enjoy them. Just get a nice looking box of some kind and make then stick their toys in it.

kavalkada · 07/12/2020 07:05

I used to live in a small apartment, 36 square metres, and the only storage I had was in the living room. I had storage space under sofa, coffee table with storage and storage on wheels under my sofa. Maybe things like that could help to bring your living room back.

These are not my pictures, but random pictures from Internet, so if it is not allowed, please remove them Mumsnet

To want my living room back
To want my living room back
To want my living room back
SimonJT · 07/12/2020 07:09

@SquidInALid

I'm bucking the trend here. I let my DC have toys in the living room, well stored and kept tidy, as it's their space too and I'm not a fan of kids being relegated to their rooms only.
I have all of my sons toys in the living room, a bedroom is for sleeping, making it a place for fun is bad for sleep hygiene.

If adults have anything fun in the livingroom like TV, radio, books etc, then children should have the same. It also makes it easier to steal their lego.

nannybeach · 07/12/2020 07:37

I lov e that SimonJT, brilliant, people wonder why kids cant/dont sleep with a room for of tech.When my gKs stay they take over lounge/conservatory AND their room, only thing that is allowed at bedtime, is cuddly toys and a book.

user1493494961 · 07/12/2020 07:40

I think it's a shame that kids are banished to their bedrooms, I don't suppose you see much of your older child if he has a sofa and TV in his room. Let your youngest play downstairs if that's what be wants to do.

DappledThings · 07/12/2020 07:43

90% of our toys are in the living room. I've sometimes felt their rooms seem. A little bare because they don't have many toys in there, although they do have a lot of books.

I have no desire to be spending time playing upstairs or carting stuff up and down stairs.

Candiekane · 07/12/2020 07:49

It won’t be long before he’s in his bedroom wanting nothing to do with you so I’d let him have some toys in the living room. It comes round quicker than you think
Doesn’t need to be loads.

JillofTrades · 07/12/2020 07:50

We are fortunate to have a huge playroom for ds but he just prefers being in the main living room with his toys because he wants to be with us. I had a storage bookcase thing in our previous home so I use that now in our living room. I really hate toys all over the place so this works well.

reluctantbrit · 07/12/2020 07:54

Depends on the amount of toys and space you have.

Our first living room was tiny compared to the bedrooms upstairs so DD always had her toys there and we played with her in her room. There was the odd doll or trains downstairs but that was then taken upstairs at bedtime.

When we moved (DD was 3) we just carried on. The only exemption was Lego but that sat in a corner and didn't really caused issues. Board games and craft material was also downstairs.

DD could bring toys down when she had friends over but all was cleared away.

BoyTree · 07/12/2020 07:57

All my kids' stuff is in the living room. I love listening to them play and they call me too come and join in with them, take pictures on things they've built and I can also help them resolve disputes etc. I was brought up in a house where there were no toys anywhere downstairs and I longed for a playroom like my friends so that I would be closer to the action!

Newstart20 · 07/12/2020 08:27

At 5 I'd probably keep most upstairs, with a few downstairs for now. Allow him to bring them down to play but they must be returned.

FinallyHere · 07/12/2020 08:31

How long before I can reclaim the space and evict everything upstairs to his own bedroom

I took this to mean the storage of toys, rather than the playing with a particular toy.

It's entirely reasonable, especially if drilled from an early age, for one toy to be played with at a time and the others tidied back to their rooms in between times.

Macncheeseballs · 07/12/2020 08:39

I don't mind kids stuff in the sitting room as I like the family to be together and sometimes play together! And we have no screens in bedrooms

Camomila · 07/12/2020 09:21

I'm bucking the trend here. I let my DC have toys in the living room, well stored and kept tidy, as it's their space too and I'm not a fan of kids being relegated to their rooms only.

I'm the same Smile I also don't make them stick to one set of toys out at the time - I find it a bit restrictive (used to be a preschool teacher)

(I'm strict about the art stuff, the teeny lego pieces and moving the chairs about to make forts - its not complete anarchy)

OP, I'd get a storage ottoman or a kallax (with the nice wooden baskets rather than the cheaper fabric inserts - I have the fabric ones and they get dirty/ bent quickly - can't wait till I can go to ikea again)

Whyistheteacold · 07/12/2020 09:27

Yanbu. I would reclaim living room as soon as child is old enough to walk up and down the stairs to get their toys themselves.

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